I do nothing all day at work and it’s draining the life and soul out of me

[ZombieWorker]

Hi all. Posting here for traffic. This will be long so I apologise. The TLDR is the title.

I graduated 7 years ago and this is my third job since then.

My first job I did nothing. I didn’t mind because I was a young graduate on a big team of people my age, and spent the day talking on the instant messager and having long lunches. When I left I said to my boyfriend (now DH) ‘finally, the real work begins’.

My second job I did a little more, but still vast amounts of nothing- think 1-2 days of work a week max. I was in a corner with my PC facing the wall behind me, and wasn’t being overlooked, so I used my downtime to write a book and do some online courses- learnt a bit of coding, French and some advanced Excel. This suited me very well, but I was still chomping at the bit to leave by the end, as the monotomy of doing nothing for 5 years was really starting to build up.

My third job I started 18 months ago. I was over the moon to get it, and AGAIN said to DH ‘it will be nice to finally start doing real work’. The first 8 weeks were a whirlwind of being taught things, but after that I was told ‘we work responsively’ and ‘you’ll be trained ad hoc as and when things show up’. Clearly, they don’t show up much- I am less busy than I was at job 2.

I’ve mentioned this before in other mumsnet chats before and the answers are always ‘talk to your boss, create your own work, get a new job, fill your day with other things’. So to address those points;

I have talked to my boss many times, always asking for things to do, and about two weeks ago it came to a head as I was nearly in tears telling her that I feel useless, that I don’t know anything more than when I started. He seems to be trying to address it and has mentioned more training, but nothing has materialised yet. I suppose it might over the next few weeks, but I can’t be confident, and it doesn’t help where I am now.

I’ve created so much work at this stage that I keep getting commended for my efforts- why nobody can see this is happening because I have NOTHING ELSE TO DO I have no idea. I’ve gone back through old folders and tidied them up, created new projects to work on, created filing systems, procedural documents- it all gets me through a few days then it’s done and I have nothing to do. I am at the point where I can’t think of a single thing to do myself. I spend a lot of time filing my emails, of which I came in this morning to a grand total of zero, triggering this post.

I could of course get a new job, this seems the logical solution, but this one is very close to my home, with a walking commute. It’s also a good wage, and I have a mortgage to pay. I like my boss, even if nobody is overly friendly here. I don’t know how I could find anything on this wage nearby. Plus, this is my third job that has been like this, so I have no faith jumping ship would leave me in a different spot.

Filling my day with other things is how I have spent my entire career to this point. This worked brilliantly at previous jobs, but I am very overlooked here and don’t feel it’s possible. We are all sat very close together in an open plan. I can listen to podcasts, and get through hours of them a day, but that still leaves me the issue of what to do with my hands. Yesterday I genuinely stared at a blank excel page for about an hour. It’s soul destroying.

My DH tries to help but what can he do. He gets upset with seeing how drained I am on coming home, and how miserable I am getting ready in the morning. He has been looking for jobs for me and sends me links but it doesn’t help that he has no idea what I do, what I’m qualified for- all the links he sends me are either not enough money or vastly past my knowledge grade. I work in a very niche area of planning regulation which I kind of stumbled into, and have no idea what my transferable skills are.

I feel stuck and it’s affecting my quality of life. I’ve gained two stone as I buy large quantities of food on my lunch to eat all afternoon. I know this is boredom but I can’t stop myself- I’m working on this now as I know a bad diet will be effecting my mental health too. I feel like a zombie trudging through the same routine every day, eating to give myself comfort, and it’s shameful. I’m at breaking point here and am really hoping somebody can magic up the answer. Thanks for reading this far.

Just wanted to add that I have had lots of jobs like this, including my current one. Am currently studying for another degree through the open university so spend a lot of time reading this books in pdf format online or with word docs open writing or planning essays etc...

There are a lot of people almost competitively posting about how their job runs them way beyond ragged and they have to lick the roads clean before paying the mill owner to go to work etc; and how they would give anything for OP's role.

Why don't THEY just "get another job" like that then as suggested, if it's so awful?

I feel for you op. I had a job in admin for the council. I was proficient and fast to do tasks. I was just a pot plant in the end, totally at a loose end most of the day. I learnt to touch type. BEST SKILL EVER! Every cloud op, every cloud.

@BuzzShitbagBobbly erm, because being busy is the complete opposite of not being busy?

Because being busy implies that somebody needs your time and skills, i.e. you’re being useful?

We’re allowed to complain about being busy without wanting to leave our jobs. The solution to being too busy is to have more people share the workload, not to quit (which would make it worse for everyone left).

Many of us are making the point that people employed in not-busy jobs that they hate should instead be employed in busy jobs, instead of complaining about it. It’s a luxury to be employed but not busy, IMO, and embarrassing to complain about it without doing anything. (OP is trying to do something about it, so that’s fine).

I am seriously considering looking for a job with the local council on the basis of this.

there was a novelist who admitted to writing his first novel while on a temp job with Westminster Council, I think, can't recall who.

@0lapislazuli most people- including myself-have been speaking about their own experience of public sector jobs, not guessing based on rumours. Yes OP works for a private firm but it was a while before this was confirmed and Her job sounded local authority based (I personally thought town planning)

However, as a public sector employee you should be more pissed off with these non jobs than anyone else (and they DO exist) they take support and resource away from front line staff and they provide poor infrastructure to the front line.

You should be angry that there ARE staff in the NHS back office who are being paid (low salaries maybe but HUGE benefits making them overall expensive employees) to produce/ complete nothing. It should be an absolute source of rage, not angry defence of the system. You are working your arse off and they are doing nothing!

I think jobs like this are common in the public service - i suggest you get out into the real world

I was in local government for over 20 years, and the only time I didn't have enough to do was for about 3 weeks, at one authority. And that was only because all committees were suspended in the run-up to local government elections, and I'd got everything else up to date, sent all my minute books to the bindery etc.

OP- Haven’t read all the replies but hear me when I tell you that I was in EXACTLY your position throughout my whole 20’s. I had 4 jobs after graduating and I only lasted in each one no more than 2 years as I had absolutely nothing to do in any of them.

I can remember sitting in open plan offices, where everyone can see your screen and I had absolutely NOTHING to do, looking at the clock at 9.10 and wondering how the fuck I was going to get through the day.

I honestly was going demented as time after time, like you every time I started a new role I thought ‘At last I’ll be busy.’ Nope, same thing. Thank GOD I had good work colleagues in each!

I left my last job and went self employed 3 years ago. In a non-professional role that I NEVER dreamt I’d do. But y’know what, I’m absolutely manic each day from 09.30-16.00 and the day goes so quickly. Plus I’m my own boss so can do what I want. If I had the type of job where I had not a lot to do but could work from home then I wouldn’t have cared! Perfect! But it was the fact I was in offices full of people and had to try and make myself look busy. Utterly soul destroying.

My advice would be to apply for other roles, even if it means a pay cut initially, maybe try a WFH role so if it is more of the same you haven’t got to sit in an office trying to look busy!

Or do what I did and go self employed in some fashion!

I wish you the best of luck, it’s just awful and I really feel for you.

Dp at his school (public boarding school) had a careers tester come in before they had to choose their options for O levels
The results were sent home to their parents

Dp never saw the results but his parents said it had come out that he should study to go into a particular career.

Dp who is very very bright studied for that career and has spent his life in that career

He has never been particularly happy given this was supposed to be, according to the careers test, his dream job. In fact it has caused him untold stress but his parents would tell him to stick with it.

Anyone who meets him outside of work cannot believe he does what he does.

It is the equivalent of meeting Del Boy and him telling you he is a Chartered Accountant.

I was going through some boxes his parents had given us when they moved into a flat. They had been left in our garage for some time

In one box was the results of the test Dp had done all those years ago.

Dp should never have done the staid but respectable job his parents had encouraged him into on the basis of this test. That career had only scored a low mark

He should have been a salesman. 10/10 No question. No debate. He can sell anything. I fully admit I am crap at selling so on a few occasions he has taken over even when I have already agreed a price he usually comes in with more money

Dp is going through a lot right now and seeing this has upset him more.

What I am trying to say is sometimes doing the safer option will just make you miserable.

If you don’t do, or at least have a crack at what you want to do then how will you know you wouldn’t be successful.

Atm op you are a round peg in a square hole and it is making you miserable.

Yes you have bills to pay and a lot of free time on your hands.

I would use that time wisely to get you on the path you want to be on.

@Oliversmum, that's really horrible for him

I can't believe his parents were willing to make him miserable, just for "stability". That's a really sad story.

Oh and just to add to lefields excellent post, I found when I had the same jobs, I was depressed. Not everyone can cope with being uninspired and unneeded all day. It manifested itself in extreme tiredness, I would be late to work because I couldn’t peel myself off the bed. I would get home at 6 and go straight to bed. I also used to get massively drunk a few times a week and go in with massive hangovers, because why not. Massive waste of a couple of years. I just felt crap about myself all the time

I've been where you are as well OP. It is utterly soul destroying and I found I just sank into a type of lethargy where if something came in that I needed to do, I couldn't be bothered to do it.

First job my boss was away a lot, and then I got my own office so I discovered forums (and also did a lot of the work for my evening course). Fortunately my boss knew and was supportive of me changing career, so that was fine.

Second job I was training for the career change job. Little did I know I was going to be training for a firm that wasn't doing too well. First 6 month seat was awful - looking back I realise that none of the partners had anything to do either, so they couldn't exactly give me stuff. And the worst part of it was that I had to stick around until 6pm every bloody day even though it was entirely pointless.

It’s always public sector....

....It’s quite extraordinary how many useless jobs there are in our enormous public sector

Except it isn't, on either count.

Local government, education and the NHS have been cut to the bone, and the service received by the public is the worse for it. All 3 are starting to experience retention problems because staff are under so much pressure, they are leaving despite their (supposedly) "cushy" jobs, "gold-plated" pensions and long holidays.

I don't know so much about the civil service, but the 2 departments I do know about (HMCTS and DWP) have huge backlogs. I find it hard to believe that working at the DWP is a cushy number when the time waiting on hold averages 45 minutes whenever I ring them, and HMCTS currently has a 50-week backlog of tribunal applications.

DP is a payroll manager. A few months ago, he started working in the public sector (one of the emergency services) for the first time. He can't believe how hard the staff have to work. He can't believe how much is expected of them (he reckons a large company running its own payroll for a workforce of equivalent size and complexity of shifts etc would have a staff of 30-40, he has 10), and how poorly supported they are in terms of things like IT.

I don't deny that there are some cushy numbers in the public sector, and that there are still some jobs that are pointless, but the days when you could spend half the morning reading the Sporting Life, then pop out to get a haircut and take your library books back are long gone in most of the public sector.

Hi OP, I haven't read the full thread (got far enough to establish you are in the private sector!) so apologies if someone else has flagged this up, but have you read the book "Bullshit Jobs" by David Graeber?

I am in a similar position - it's crazy because I'm in sales which is always go-go-go, but my company literally can't keep up with incoming orders so the whole sales team has been asked to slow down and travel less. No one will be fired though because the owner likes the status of having a high-flying sales team and doesn't want to pay unemployment (I'm in the US). I'm finishing soon to have a baby and do an MBA and can't wait for the change of pace!

For what it's worth, I've been doing a lot of working from home and conquering lifemin and housework while getting paid. I don't feel great about it.

Wishing you all the best and hope you can find an exit strategy!

Go and work for an SME

No hiding there!

There are budget cuts every year and I’ve been through multiple rounds of restructuring and voluntary redundancies. People that leave never get replaced, so workload is always increasing.

And in local government, central government are always introducing new shite and never giving local government the resources to deal with it!

The new homeless prevention legislation is massively time consuming and labour intensive and there was no extra money for staff to implement it. It's a fairly specialist role, which requires a good deal of legal knowledge, and is hugely stressful: they regularly deal with people who are very distressed and in tears, and are often on the receiving end of threats, and sometimes violence.

Experienced staff have got burned out and left. Almost all the caseworkers at one council near me are now agency staff, who cost far more than permanent staff and don't know half of what they're talking about. And they've been told they have to identify savings because they're at risk of overspend because of all the agency staff ...

If anyone wants a job that's mentally challenging and always busy, here's a few: homelessness/housing caseworker, nurse, independent domestic violence adviser, social worker, teacher, probation officer or whatever they're called this week, carer, benefits adviser, paramedic.

Is there a possibility you could take on another, additional, role in your company when someone else leaves or is promoted? Maybe speak to your manager about this possibility and also check your company's intranet site for possible jobs? The second role doesn't need to be located at your office, given the capabilities of remote working these days (eg Skype and other video conferencing facilities).

Alternatively why not look at either recruitment or management consultancy? I've worked in both and our feet rarely touched the ground as there was so much work to do, client based as well as in-house support roles.

You are right not to just accept the status quo. This is not good for you either mentally or professionally.

Good luck OP. 🌹

FieldsOfWheat but if you read ops post she admits to going for the safer option all by herself.

Dd is trying to break into a career that is thought of as very risky.

She does other jobs as well a couple of which if you looked on websites or on the job description they say you have to have a degree.

Dd has a handful of scraped through GCSEs but can talk her way into most jobs.

Op when you look at higher pay grade jobs if they took away what qualifications they want would you be able to do the work.

If yes then why not apply.
As Dd says they only put they want a degree to weed out those without one who aren’t confident in their own abilities

Also have you thought of paying for an some appointments with an external Executive Outplacement Consultancy?

These are often used by companies to benefit their outgoing staff (usually at a reasonably senior level) to reposition their thinking, objectives, goals and skill sets whilst looking for new positions. Why not have a google and see if that might suit you as a place to get unbiased (but paid for) professional advice? Along the lines of a counsellor but professional career advice rather than emotional, marriage, etc.

Might be more successful than speaking to a recruitment consultancy who may be more results led by placing you in a new company for their commission?

That must be soul destroying. I had one week of this and that was bad. I can't imagine how terrible it must be to do this for several years.

Either change jobs, ask to work from home (at least you can do something useful or something you like while there isn't any work) or, controversial: stop looking busy and just do clearly nothing. Bring some knitting, a book, crafts, what have you. I bet the manager will find work in no time. If they do come with disciplinary, you can clearly state they have been paying you for literally doing feck all. It shouldn't happen. You can also send an email to the entire department/company stating you have nothing to do snd will anyone with work please send it to so-and-so. Or threaten your manager with that. I'm sure it will make them look bad, so they'll try to help if only to save their own skin.

@onemouseplace - I've been where you are as well OP. It is utterly soul destroying and I found I just sank into a type of lethargy where if something came in that I needed to do, I couldn't be bothered to do it.

^This.

Go into teaching- your problems will disappear overnight! Seriously- I love the fact I’m always busy but then have long holidays.

I could have written your post. Right down to the putting on weight due to boredom. Also had a heavy handed HR dept so you couldn't surf the net, use your phone anything. I finally left after staring at an empty inbox for 3 hours. We also couldn't take long lunches, you were expected to be there.

After leaving my mental health spiralled downwards.

My advice would be to put serious energy into looking for a new job.

Well I must say, this is quite a reassuring read because I thought I was the only one.
I moved from a fast paced but rather low paying industry 5 years ago to an office based job and honestly 6 years later and I don't really know how as I am still here as I am only ''busy'' 60% of the time

I, too have planned all sorts of things during work hours - my wedding/honeymoon/general life admin sort of things

The reason I stay is that my husband and I are TTC and this company have an excellent maternity package. I also have ridiculously good holiday/can book it off easily.
I have a ''side hustle'' that keeps my brain active is highly paying and wouldn't fit around any other job.

When I first started I stupidly thought this was my forever job (they don't exist) because the conditions were great (I have worked in places with very bad conditions before) but the day top day boredom gets to you after a while

I also found myself gaining weight but nipped this in the bud by using the stairs at all times (we are based on the 6th floor) and other small changes like that

I would definitely try talking to some recruiters.

Your skills could well be transferable - for example to regulatory affairs in a pharmaceutical company, if you don't mind working in that industry.