AIBU to tell you that you don’t need to be unhappy with your body.

[Iwalkedaway]

I’ve just been reading another thread where lots of posters talk about how attractive they were when slimmer, as though being overweight is out of their control!

I definitely don’t want to come across as negative or patronising, but for the vast majority of people (excluding those with health needs, of course), weight is entirely within your control!

I’ve always been moderately slim, but in the last few years I’ve lost about 3 stone. At almost 40 I’m the smallest I’ve ever been! To achieve that I;

Got into yoga.
Eat less calories than I burn (monitored on fitness tracker)
Swim and weight train sometimes.
Drink less alcohol.
Will do random, ad hoc exercise through the day, squats whilst the stirring the food etc.

So many people seem sad about their weight gain on here, but it’s absolutely a choice! If you’re unhappy change it! It’s absolutely possible

OP - I’m not in the least bit interested in your weight loss tips. But I would LOVE to understand where you get your inner confidence and self-belief.
There is no part of me that thinks I could inspire a stranger to change their lifestyle by offering some unsolicited chatty words of encouragement along with a sentence or two about my experiences.
I just cannot conceive of how anyone could think that doing that ”could inspire even one person”.
People seem unimpressed by your dieting theories. You should give out advice in how to increase self-confidence. You have got some chops on you.

All I have to do is get up early to fit in exercise? So if my toddler wakes up at 5am, I need to be up at 4am to do yoga and get a shower. You're right, this sounds like a piece of piss, why didn't I do this sooner?!

Sets alarm.
Switches off an alarm because there's more to life than being slim.

OP when people get into their forties they tend to look haggard if they are thin. I definitely wouldn’t want to be thin at that age.

Seriously though we live in such a crappy society that judges women based on their looks. Who cares?

lovelylondonsky Time for a new kettle

FFS. Possibly the most patronising post I've ever read. Thank you OP for your words of enlightenment - because we had no idea. What a bunch of ignorant fatties we must be.

I listened to a radio thing recently and the gist of it was, your body will always try and get itself back to the largest you ever were (an evolutionary fat storing thing from back when we only lived to 30 and didnt have ready food sources available). So if you've ever been overweight it will always be much, much harder not to be over weight again in the future. A very depressing thought for many of us who feel like we have to permanently be on a restrictive in order to maintain a normal weight. And something smug twats like you might want to consider when preaching to us.

*restrictive diet

If we all had to move of planet earth to somewhere that weighing 600lbs was the healthiest weight could you do that Op? I would struggle to eat the calories required no matter how much helpful advice I was given.
I have only ever been between 10 st.and 12st even pregnant. That’s my range.

If you want to be thin then truthfully it does require massive discipline and zero interest in eating. All the properly thin people I know have small portion sizes and say no to food as much as the rest of us have just a small slice of office birthday cake.

most people who are really unhappy with their weight don’t need to be!

Wow. And you know these people personally, do you.

Can you cure disabilities and turn water into wine too, @Iwalkedaway?

YABU. DFOD.

people are being very jokey and lighthearted with you.and they are much better people than me becasue frankly youve given me the rage!
what a oh please fuck off post.
how about comeing on and helping people see past this fucking obsession with weight and how you look.about seeing your goodness past the scales. about you are not your number!
yes there are health problems yes some people needs help to change.but they are also people.with so much mroe to them than their number below them on a chart.fuck me people are feeling so shit about themselves becasue of how they once looked beautiful slimmer.but why?why did they?becasue of societys ideal?who sad slimmer is more beautiful.posts like this ingrain that this si the right thing.when its not.we are all beautiful and unique and should be proud of the body we consantly demonise and damage due to it not being good enough.
i dont think our weight troubles comes from this sugar,bad meals,overfeeding crap people spill.but stems from this self hatred we all start to feel which spirals into body shaming and self shaming and then disordered eating.
when did this obesity 'crisis' come about.when we focussed on bodies.diet culture became huge.mental health problems were on the rise.fat shaming.pressure from work and life.the obsession with bmi and fad diets.families struggling.money struggles.
and then vunerable people lost their balance.
but hey if i just wiggled my toes whilst having a piss maybe it will all go away

Iwalkedaway please tell us more! Do you have any more life tips?! I just know you're living your best life! I just want to type more sentences about how wonderful you are! So that I can put more ! at the end of each one!!

!

ODFOD

So Iwalkedaway joined us a couple of days ago, probably specifically to tell us this fabulous news! Its too good not to share! A quick scan of her contributions to other threads will confirm, she REALLY IS FABULOUS!

Shame on those of you who didn't see it!

I mean, your username fits to be fair.

Off you fuck

I know what you mean to an extent op.
I definitely feel that there is so much more to being overweight than less calories in weight reduces. It’s so much more emotional than that.
Plus issues re lack of time to exercise/disability/lack of opportunity to exercise (I.e living in a small flat, few safe outdoor spaces locally and can’t afford the gym).
However I do agree that if someone is unhappy with their weight and wants to tackle it, they would have to take responsibility and find something that works.
Same as a smoker needs to take responsibility for stopping smoking, an alcoholic needs to take responsibility for their drinking to stop. People with various other physical and mental health difficulties need to find a way to manage their condition and recover.
Constant excuses/avoidance will never solve a problem.
It is not an easy thing to do however, I disagree with you there, especially for those with emotional attachment to eating.
I’m glad you found what works for you op.

Don’t be so patronising. You think you telling people who don’t like their bodies that they should, and everything is easily changeable? It’s so easy to lose weight? Says who! You? So easy to just ‘love’ our bodies. What an absolutely misguided and silly post. If only things were that simple.

Metoooo
no its not the same with mental illness.would you say that to someone having a stroke or with cancer?mental illness isnt a choice.just like choosing to recover isnt choosig to do so or findnig somethign that works!

So my back injury means I can’t squat or lunge or do a lot of yoga....what is your wisdom for me. Fuck off 🖕🏼

So someone who has no real issue with their weight gives advice to us fatties on how to be slim?

Did you mean fewer calories?

I am going to start an advice column on these lines.

I have a great happy relationship.
My advice is to choose a partner who makes you happy and is thoughtful and kind.

I enjoy my job.
My advice is to hold out for a job where the people are lovely and the work is meaningful and makes a difference.

Totally missing the point OP, I'll spell it out for you. What about the people who think 'I want to be slim but I want cake more and I'm sad about that because I don't want to want cake more'

Maybe you should consider becoming a doctor, high all this unique medical insight you have😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I have one, if you are dehydrated try drinking more water.

And so disheartening when you do have a health issue and everyone around you assumes you are stuffing your face, I exercise 6-7 hours a week, gym (cardio 2 hours per week) aqua aerobics 2.5 hours, zumba 1 hour, pilates 1 hour and a couple of walks. I eat soup for lunch and dinner Monday to Friday, prob max 1200 calories including everything such as Skimmed milk in my tea, I rarely drink, poss once a month and then it is g&t, (slimline tonic). I am still putting on weight, ffs I stuck religiously to 1000 cals a day for a month and put on 4 pounds, I am totally fed up and posts like this somehow make it feel worse 😐😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭