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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be cross about visitors not liking my dog

444 replies

calamityJayne1 · 14/06/2019 19:03

I have a Labrador who is the daftest dog you’d ever meet.

Due to my work children and parents visit my house. They know I have a dog who is harmless yet people still make comments like why is he barking and I don’t like dogs and physically wincing if he comes near them.

This is only on arrival and I put the dog in a different room for the duration of their visit, but I am getting really tired of anti dog people making comments and someone even asked me to ensure the dog was locked in a different room on arrival!

Given the fact that new people are informed I have a dog and he’s playful and barks I don’t understand people’s reactions. I understand not everyone likes dogs but why can’t people stop act like snowflakes and move on?

AIBU to feel totally fed up and only invite dog friendly people to my house?

OP posts:
MaverickSnoopy · 14/06/2019 19:18

I like the idea of dogs but in practice when I'm with one I feel anxious and sometimes scared. I try my best to hide it though but sometimes it can't be helped. I have a friend with a lovely dog who will run to the door barking with excitement and will jump up at me. I feel sick when she does it and like crying. Does that mean I'm anti dog or hate dogs? No.

You're being very black and white about this.

justbeniceplease · 14/06/2019 19:19

I don't like dogs. Why should I like yours?

givemesteel · 14/06/2019 19:19

I don't know what kind of work / business you have but having a dog barking like a maniac whilst you're trying to hold a meeting is very distracting and unprofessional.

I like dogs and so do my dc but my dd gets very upset when dogs bark at her. She's too young to understand that it's harmless.

If you work with families I'm surprised you can't see this as a problem.

mbosnz · 14/06/2019 19:20

We have a tutor who comes to our house twice a week. He doesn't like cats. We love our cat. She's a very curious and social siamese, who loves new people. We lock her away before he comes.

Pinkmouse6 · 14/06/2019 19:21

YABU. Barking dogs are annoying, I also hate jumpy dogs. If your home is also your place of work, the dog should definitely be kept in another room before customers walk in. Some people are scared of dogs, others have allergies and some just aren’t keen.

Topseyt · 14/06/2019 19:22

Is it family doing this? Tell them that they either accept your dog or they don't come to your house.

You probably do need to work on the barking issue, as it would make some people feel uncomfortable. I would be tempted to put a house line on the dog at first, rewarding when quiet and calm, and keeping them largely with me.

Overall though, I think that people who are obviously hostile to the presence of the dog would not be regular or invited guests in my house.

Excited101 · 14/06/2019 19:24

Or you could train your dog not to bark at people?

I was phobic of dogs as a child, now I generally like them but if there’s barking I’m instantly incredibly worried, same if they jump up unless I know them very very well.

Dogs dominate very easily, it’s a lot for people to put up with if they’re not ‘dog people’, it’s quite fair really.

crazyasafox · 14/06/2019 19:24

Why does your dog keep barking at people in your house? Confused

Sounds like he needs his behaviour looking at.

People with dogs always think their dogs shit rainbows, and anyone who isn't comfortable with having a dog slobbering over them, jumping up them, scratching them, putting mud all over them, and barked at them; is a miserable animal-hating twat. Hmm

YABVVVVVVU!

Aberforthsgoat · 14/06/2019 19:24

YABU OP. Why should everyone like your dog? Why aren’t they allowed to be afraid of dogs? Or not be comfortable with an unknown dog barking at them?
Why don’t you just put your dog away before they arrive if you put him in another room anyway?
Then you won’t have to get tired of the comments

I always roll my eyes at people like this who just assume the world must love their pets/kids/hobbies as much as they do or they’re being “precious”

Doilooklikeatourist · 14/06/2019 19:25

I don’t like dogs , and wouldn’t go to your house if the dog was allowed to bark at me , and came up to me

Put the dog in another room before visitors arrive if you know they don’t like him

Powerbunting · 14/06/2019 19:25

I like dogs. I have a dog that barks and is playful.

That's my dog. My relationship with her. My training issue.

I always insist a dog no matter the size or sound it makes is put away before I enter a client's house. My dog is always away when anyone other than close friends/ family visit.

If you don't like people wincing or seeming scared of your dog, train it better so that it doesn't scare people

adaline · 14/06/2019 19:26

YABU.

Your dog shouldn't be barking all the time - and he obviously does if loads of people complain.

I have a barky dog, so he goes in the kitchen or outside when we have guests.

RagingWhoreBag · 14/06/2019 19:26

YABVU I’m not a dog lover, I hate them jumping up at me, licking me, sniffling my crotch, barking (you see it as playful - to someone who doesn’t know your dog it’s intimidating and comes across as aggressive). Even if friendly, I don’t want to feel obliged to stroke its fur as I then want to wash my hands the whole time I’m there. For non-dog lovers, the smell of dog is a lot stronger than I suspect it is to you (much like smoke to a non-smoker).

If I came to your house and your dog was bounding around ‘playfully’, barking, I’d also feel uncomfortable but probably wouldn’t have the nerve to say anything - the fact that people are voicing and showing their discomfort says to me that your dog is more annoying than you realise.

madcatladyforever · 14/06/2019 19:26

I adore my cat but she is dangerous and bites people and children so she is locked up now when anyone comes over.
I do home visits all the time and i love seeing other peoples cats and dogs but some folk just don't like animals. My parents wince whenever they see one of my cats.

Expressedways · 14/06/2019 19:27

It sounds like your dog needs training- he shouldn’t be barking at visitors and playful, unless it’s a puppy, sounds like another way saying badly behaved.

I’m also confused about these families coming into your home. If it’s work related and you’re being paid for this then it’s extremely unprofessional not to put the dog in another room for the duration of their visit. If these are friends/family members then it’s a bit different- if they don’t want to go to a home with a dog presumably you could meet up elsewhere e.g. their house, a cafe etc.

TantricTwist · 14/06/2019 19:28

YABU.

Train your dog.

DM1209 · 14/06/2019 19:28

Where did OP go....?

General for dogs AND for children:

  1. No one will love them as you do.
  2. No one will find them as adorable and entertaining as you do.
  3. People will often tolerate them and will be polite about them but no one wants to be licked, sniffed, jumped upon or barked at by them - kids or dogs!

Sort your animal out, train it better or move to a secluded Island and live happily ever after, just the 2 of you.

LeavesAndGreenTrees · 14/06/2019 19:28

YABVU. And selfish.

FizzyGreenWater · 14/06/2019 19:29

Your dog does not sound very well trained.

SinkGirl · 14/06/2019 19:29

Sounds like people are coming to your house to pay you for a service - piano lessons, tutoring etc

Can you afford to only work with people who love dogs as much as you do? If so, knock yourself out.

If not, you need to train your dog so it doesn’t upset your clients and make sure it’s shut away. And not refer to the people who put food on your table as “snowflakes”

You don’t sound like someone I’d make the mistake of visiting twice, to be fair.

saraclara · 14/06/2019 19:31

This is only on arrival and I put the dog in a different room for the duration of their visit, but I am getting really tired of anti dog people making comments and someone even asked me to ensure the dog was locked in a different room on arrival!

If you put the dog in a different room for the duration of their visit, why can you not put it in that room before you open the front door? Adds only a minute to his confinement, yet makes them much more comfortable/less scared.

mummyhaschangedhername · 14/06/2019 19:31

Hmmmm ... I am not a dog person, I don't mind them but I'm certainly not a big fan.

If I was going to a friends house I would to,erase a dog, maybe greet it but I wouldn't want it jumping up on me or hovering around me.

If I was going to someone's house for a non-friendship purpose, then I would be irritated. I don't like the noise of barking, I were hearing aids and they screech when there are sounds like barking, so it physically really annoying/painful. I dog hoovering around is really unprofessional too.

So, if you were my friend I would tolerate your dog because you were my friend and you love your dog, I wouldn't love your dog though. if it were in any other circumstance though I would be annoyed. I think a dog should be kept out of the way of you have clients.

codemonkey · 14/06/2019 19:33

Thank fuck you're not my friend. Luckily all the dog owners I know aren't twats.

Thehop · 14/06/2019 19:33

One of my dogs is perfect, the other is a twat that jumps and yaps. I lock them both in a utility when people come unless they’re (idiots) people who like them and want to see them.

It’s u reasonable to expect people to put up with a barky, jumpy dog I’m afraid. If your job means visitors you’ll have to have a safe place that you can put your dog.

Kazzyhoward · 14/06/2019 19:33

Some people have a real phobia about dogs. If you expect them to come and visit you, then you have to respect that and make what are very minor/trivial changes to accommodate them. How hard can it be to put the dog in another room?

If your visitors were vegetarians, would you still insist on feeding them meat? I can't see the difference.

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