Never been abroad or on a plane at age 35!

[SalemShadow]

There was a woman on dinner date yest. She is 35, never been abroad or on on an aeroplane. She was telling her date he will have to take her on a holiday. Aibu to be completely shocked? I couldn't believe it. Seems a sheltered existence

I personally can't understand wanting to go overseas and not doing it, unless it's due to financial reasons or other constraints. Even if you only pop over to France, travel is very convenient and cheap nowadays. That said, people have incredibly different interests and it would be boring if we were all the same.

Kennehora

a couple of weeks on a package probably won't increase their empathy.

I really don't think that poster was talking about people who go on package holidays.

Well, the poster I was quoting was myself (clarifying a point I'd made).

I'm 47 and I'm going on a plane for the first time next month.
I've been abroad to Europe before but not for over 20 years and that was by ferry.
Never been able to afford it before. We've always done really budget caravan holidays in the UK.

I'm embarrassed to admit this in real life because of judgey people like you OP.

@FionasWineShow Your world is as narrow as someone who doesn't want to travel abroad. It's just a different narrow. Your 'achievement' is surrounding yourself with people only like yourself, which to most would be rather dull.

All Foinaswineshow is doing it mixing with average people. Because the overwhelming majority of people aged 35 or more have travelled abroad or been on a plane.

Like her, I don't know anyone of that age who hasn't.

I understand some can't afford it, or have a fear of flying, but people actually boasting about being 55, never flown, never been abroad, no plans to change it, are like people who like to boast about being crap at maths. That insular parochial mind set is nothing to be proud of. Quite the opposite in fact.

Because the overwhelming majority of people aged 35 or more have travelled abroad or been on a plane.

but the point you are ignoring despite it being repeated many times is that "being on plane" or "abroad" doesn't mean you have "travelled in the way you are trying to give it.

So again, some people are smug because they have been on 2 package holiday to Magaluf or a campsite in France and they've "done Spain and France", whilst others have had much more interesting holidays staying in the UK.

@morondelaFrontera

I don't see anyone being smug about being on a package holiday - that is your interpretation. I more see people being baffled about not having any interest in travel if they are able to do so. Obviously it is different if you can't afford it or have physical or mental limitations but just having no interest is strange. It is like people who don't want to try new food or anything that isn't the norm.

I don't see how sneering you about people who go on packages to Magaluf is any better than expressing shock about people not having any interest in the world we live in.

I’m more shocked that she told him in 2019, that’ll he’ll have to take her. FFS!

MondayTuesdayWednesday
again, you are completely missing my point. I don't care one way or another, but people who limit themselves to package holiday AND pretend they have an interest in travel as more worth of judgement than the one who don't travel by choice.

Posters pretending to be "surprised" that others make other choice, meaning they think they are superior, but not having done any real travel themselves should keep quiet. That's all I am saying.

I would be surprised if someone in my neighbourhood had never been abroad as it would be unusal for that demographic.

Within 10 miles, I've worked in schools where kids are shocked that I drive a few miles their small town every day. That's a big trip to some to be done on a few special occasions a year. They may get a holiday to the nearest traditional seaside town. Those that do go abroad will tend to have a cheaper AI package holiday to a Little-Britain-in-the-sun type resort.

You can be well travelled within the UK. You can visit the same or a series of generic resorts and have little sense of the wider location, and while abroad, it's not well travelled.

Personally, I have the opportunities and a desire to experience different places both around the UK and beyond. Some countries have made me appreciate the landscape and culture of the UK even more than I did already. (Free speech, no fear of (armed) corrupt police, diversity of landscape and people etc...)

I personally would find it odd, but that is because it is normal within my circles to travel. I completely understand not being able to due to finances. I struggle more with simply not wanting to.

You can be well travelled within the UK.

Yes you can, but that would not make you well travelled.

Even people who go on a package holiday to Magaluf encounter new experiences; different food (even if they don't eat it), cars on the wrong side of the road, different shops, working in Euros.

There is much to enjoy in the UK.

I agree. I keep discovering bits that I never realised were utterly beautiful.

Until about 10 years ago, Dorset was just a county we drove through on the way to the south-west. Then we went to the Isle of Purbeck for the weekend and I was gobsmacked by its utter loveliness.

So we went a lot more and found it utterly amazing: the incredible etched windows at the church at Moreton, atmospheric Maiden Castle, the lovely walk from Seatown to Golden Cap, quirky Bridport, Beaminster (how had I never heard of Beaminster? It has a gorgeous town centre), the campsite above Dancing Ledge with views across to the Isle of Wight.

I was over 50 and had lived less than 100 miles away for 15 years or more. It was almost on our doorstep but we'd never explored it, heading generally for areas better known for scenery, like the Yorkshire Dales or Lakes.

I bet there are loads of areas of Britain that I would be utterly enchanted by, but just haven't discovered yet. I think it's a shame people often know so little about their own country, and I count myself among those people.

Until about 10 years ago, Dorset was just a county we drove through on the way to the south-west. Then we went to the Isle of Purbeck for the weekend and I was gobsmacked by its utter loveliness.

Nah, not for me. I live in Devon and I have never left. I'm 103, never been to Dorset and I have no intention of going now. There's so much to see in Devon, and I think it's very snooty, all you snobs expecting people to have travelled to another county. I've been all over Devon, I am very well travelled.

Thanks @Lifecraft - exactly.

If you are one of these people who think they are "well travelled" because they took a couple of holiday in the fashionable Brit resort, "done a country" because you spent 10 days in it, you are not as clever as you think you are

You can rest assured, that's not me. I'm not a 'Brit', for one.

I come from a culture where anyone worth their salt goes on their 'big OE' (overseas experience) once they hit their 20s. They head off overseas for a couple of years to live and work - could be one country, could be several. Could be 6 months. Could be 10 years.

Getting to 35 and never even getting on a plane is just beyond insular to me. No curiosity or interest beyond your own little world just seems incredibly dull-minded. This is an anonymous forum, so I'll be honest about what I think, even if I'd never vocalise it in real life.

My Mum went off on hers in the 1960s - back then it was by ship, and it took months instead of days, just to get there. But it was still about wanting to see what was out there, and a curiosity about what's beyond your own back door.

The stories she told, and the friends she made, had me itching to head off myself. I'll be encouraging my kids to do the same, although they've already had their fair share of adventures. They have triple citizenship, so again, the likelihood of them staying put is pretty slim.

Hopefully this explains a little why it's quite so outside my 'normal'.

but people actually boasting about being 55, never flown, never been abroad, no plans to change it, are like people who like to boast about being crap at maths. That insular parochial mind set is nothing to be proud of. Quite the opposite in fact

Not boasting Just stating a fact.

Yes,I am crap at maths ,again not boasting about it,just stating another fact

I never said I was proud of it. It's just not something I've done for a number of reasons. Being petrified of flying(yes I know there are other ways to travel abroad),enclosed spaces and lack of money to name just a few.

FionasWineShow
but why can't you understand that your "normal" doesn't have to be everybody's "normal"?

You do sound like a kiwi I have to say (and that's not an insult at all )

I had lived in 3 countries by the age of 4, but as I said above, I have heard of lot of criticism and negatives because I don't "settle" or "have roots" in one particular country.

I don't agree with the criticism and judgment of people who make different choices. Their life is just as valid.

My sister says Mexico is the best country to visit in the world. Not sure how she came to that conclusion when her trip involved plane, coach, hotel, coach, plane, home.

Everyone is different though. Some people
Like the UK. To be honest I prefer it but don’t like the weather.

I don't agree with the criticism and judgment of people who make different choices.

I bet you do. I bet you make judgements about people based on their political views, their facial tattoos, the way they talk or the way they parent their kids. We all make judgements about all sorts of things, but on MN it's taboo. No one can judge anyone for anything. It's utter cobblers.

I'm perfectly free to judge adults who have never been abroad, for no other reason than "I don't want to go". They're not short of money, they have no fear of flying, they just don't want to.

I judge them to be parochial dullards. There...I've said it. Sue me!

fact not boast that , Im 55 and never been on a plane and the only time iv been abroad is to the European cup final many years ago
at least in England if things are crap you can get in the car and drive home

My MIL-to-be is 51 and has never been on a plane. It really doesn't matter.

You do sound like a kiwi I have to say (and that's not an insult at all )

Clearly it is!

We all judge things - if you tell me you don't judge anything, I'll say you're lying.

Lifecraft said it way better than me.

FionasWineShow

of course it's not. I just happen to have met plenty of kiwis friends who insist that it's a rite of passage to travel and that "everybody" spends a couple of years abroad. I have no way of knowing if it's true or not.

well, ok, Lifecraft you have moved and worked on several continents, explored many countries for months at a time, speak several languages, possibly have double or triple nationality so that makes you superior of others who have different life experience.

Judge away. I am still not sure how it proves how much open-minded all your travels have made you though

my point FionasWineShow was that many of the people who judge others who are not "well-travelled" are nowhere in a position to do so.

You can even be an expat and mix exclusively with others from the same nationality or culture and not speak a word of the language of the country you are in. I have met some. It's all relative really.