Dentist in tesco tackled me

[Spiceb]

Shopping with 3 year old yesterday. Stopped by the raisins. Old woman came up to me and said "excuse me but please don't buy them. They are terribly bad for teeth" I must have looked incredulous because her husband stepped in to say she was a dentist

Aibu to think go away and let me shop in peace? I'm a sensible grown adult who can make choices

@Ghanagirl
yes indeed, it happened to someone I knew

I was looking at the cakes in Co op, and a man of indeterminate age I'm not telling said that I looked like I had eaten all the cakes

I would have told her to fuck off

Would you? Really? Are there women out there who use language like that to complete strangers?

I always tell men and boys (it's always men and boys) who cycle on the pavements that they should be cycling on the road. I ALWAYS get told to fuck off.

Pah, I thought this was going to be about the OP literally being rugby tackled to the floor by a psychotic dentist. Rather more mundane!

I think it was cheeky of her to step in and effectively criticise the OP's shopping. I understand why she said what she said, but it wasn't her place to comment.

I would have been annoyed if it had been me, but would have been polite and just got on with my shopping.

We put raisins, sultanas or other fruit with cereal for breakfast. They add nice flavour and aren't eaten willy nilly throughout the day. They are part of a balanced diet when used in moderation. They aren't empty calories like sugar itself is. They do contain fibre and some other vitamins.

My DDs have grown up fine eating that way. Still have all of their own teeth and as far as I can remember none have any fillings. They are aged 24, 20 and 16 now. Only DD3 needed any tooth removed, and that was only because a milk tooth had failed to even loosen and had been forced sideways by the emerging adult tooth.

@JinglingHellsBells, yes I said something stupid. I just found the idea of animals having their teeth brushed funny.

I was hardly at a conference professing to be a dentistry expert, no need to get so upset....

I'm going to start going up to fat people in the supermarket when they stand near the biscuits, and say "excuse me, please don't buy them. They're terribly bad for someone your size and you'll get diabetes or heart disease"

If my child needed raisins because of their condition I'd explain that politely to the person. Telling them to 'Fuck off' is so aggressive and rude.

"Elderly" is relevant. I've had and seen more silver haired men and women think they can tell younger parents what to do than a different age group.

It isn’t at all relevant to OPs AIBU.

I gave my oldest tooth decay from eating raisins, introduced as a potty training reward, luckily his adult teeth are good. My youngest breastfed until 3 and had fed to sleep, I'm convinced his teeth were damaged by this

I think you guys just have bad genetics

I was trying to get my head around having an “elderly” dentist! I think elderly might be a suitable descriptor for someone who is over 80 but otherwise it is plain daft to apply it.

It's true though it's awful for kids teeth. Parents think they're giving a healthy snack and they're not

Harassing? Aren't we getting a bit carried away with the language here? The next post will say bullying, the next abuse etc. Keep it in context! Harassing would be following the poster down the street , keeping on at them day after day, not taking no for an answer, that sort of thing. This was just a comment, which probably wasn't intended to wound at all.

My friends, a married couple, both dentists, once admitted they occasionally had toffees for lunch. I was most cheered!

Oysterbabe, I too have had strangers making comments about (disabled) ds's behaviour/him watching an iPad/the contents of my fucking shopping basket and the fact that he was in a buggy... that I'm sure were supposed to be helpful/wise/educational for their children or whatever the commenter wanted to say to make themselves feel better and pat themselves on the back.

Being assertive, smiling sweetly and calmly explaining about your child's medical condition (not that one should have to...and actually often completely inappropriate in front of your child and their siblings) then letting it go and carrying on as if nothing happened is a cracking idea. But in reality encounters like this, especially when they are a recurring theme, or you are at a particularly vulnerable time, can leave you feeling pretty raw. People don't need to pass comment, people don't need to judge, people can just carry on about their day and act with kindness.

Yes if a dentist approached me about buying raisens I could politely tell her all about DD's bowels. Doesn't she deserve some privacy though? Or should her medical conditions be fair game for a chat with a stranger in co-op? Maybe I could have handled the situation better with the extremely rude and patronising woman who told us off for DD not walking but we were a bit blindsided by it. DH and I spoke a lot after about what we wish we'd said.
I think it would be good if these people are shut down in a way that makes them think twice next time. All this smiling sweetly and politely explaining doesn't go far enough to make them realise that they need to wind their fucking neck.

Haha,
Not quite the same but I was once out shopping and looking at a pack of ‘cauliflower steaks’ (I was never going to buy them). Another shopper approached me and said I really didn’t need to buy those, did I know I could just buy a cauliflower and slice it up?
I must look really dumb 😀

I came across this article, concerning a link between extended breast feeding and tooth decay. So that previous poster may well have been right about knowing someone who had a tooth extracted because of this.

Obviously not exactly the same but someone just shared this poem on my FB and it made me think of this thread.

advice on swearing

you called me vulgar
after the gig
said it softly like a mother
as if it were advice

your head weighted to the side
sympathising with
something missing in my life
which i was obviously
filling with these obscenities

you gazed at me
the way my grandma did
softly tucking my hair
behind me ears
to let keep it off my face
saying things like
i wish you’d make something of yourself, Hollie
or
don’t you want to be pretty like your cousins
or
you look nicer with mascara on

you didn’t ask me
for my reasons
just advised
the lack of need
to swear inside a poem
as if a poem were a
a planet crust
unsuited to volcanoes

you suggested I channel a
‘little more Virginia Woolf’

i thought of stones in my pocket
i though of Plath in my pocket
i thought their beautiful poems
i thought depression and solitude
i thought how Aidan Moffat
was on the fucking stage just
after me swearing like a trooper
and you didn’t soap his mouth
i thought how few of my friends
who have dicks and read poems
have been advised against swearing
i thought Chaucer and broomsticks
i thought Robert Burn’s shagging
i thought Dylan Thomas
I thought Lord Byron
i thought orgies and heckling
in Shakespearean theatres
i thought how swearing
has been scientifically
proven to release oxytocin
so stop fucking advising
me not to swear in my poems
as if i know nothing about language
and have not chosen those words
deliberately because i find them
expressive and beautiful
and very fucking useful
sometimes you arrogant
arsehole

i didn’t say that though
i don’t like awkward
conversations

so i breathed in
for the
thousandth time

smiled like
a good women

smiled like a good girl

smiled like a good
female poet

smiled like a child

till you finished
your lesson
and nodded at me
like an ant you had
saved with a delicate leaf
in a literary puddle

then you went

I stood for a second

I said nothing
out loud

I said fuck you
very loud
in my head

and immediately
felt better able
to breath again

I would have thanked her for her advice and moved on.

If it helps just one person not to have dreadful teeth I suspect she will be happy.

FWIW my dentist says he'd prefer kids to have chocolate as at least it melts off teeth at body temperature than dried fruit which tends to stick.

Ha, she sounds like a total wanker. I’d have been inclined to shove ten packs in my trolley just to make a point.

Thankyou for posting that poem Oysterbabe...I will be thinking of it next time I am smiling and shouting fuck off in my head. Is it Hollie McNish?

Yes it is

If you saw a mum letting her child play on a railway track with a train bearing down on them, wouldn’t you shout to warn them? Or would that be “ interfering”?

This is EXACTLY the same as letting your kid eat raisins. Fuck me!

These threads are always comedy gold, bring out the rabid crazies...

I hope you weren't giving your 3 year old Haribo...

Errr, why? What misery could possibly come from letting your 3 year old eat haribo, do tell??