Raisins are pretty shocking for your teeth tbf, it's the stickiness and all the sugar and the fact they are often a snack. Snacking on sugary, sticky foods rots your teeth, and of.
I'm a dentist and sometimes I really cringe when I see children eating loads of raisins. I wouldn't say anything(in a non-clinical setting), because that would be out of order but it gets me.
Maybe she remembers all the children she's referred for GA extractions, or the 9 years olds she's had to take adult molars out of? Or children she's done GA extractions on.
The first child I ever extracted on, was 3 and under GA. I remember how tiny she was, her little hand flopping and her little head head moving, and all the blood over her face. I'm not squeamish at all with blood and extractions but it really upset me, it's one of my most upsetting memories.
I'm not saying that OPs children will end up having GA for extractions, or that this woman is right. But a "lol my kids eat Haribos" attitude is pretty shit. Sure all children eat sweets, and controlled access to sugar is better than none at all, but it's that throw away attitude.
Every parent always has an excuse for why their child has fillings, and its never too much sugar or not brushing their child's teeth. Except it almost always is that, and if you can prevent your child need fillings or extractions why wouldn't you?