To start a thread for the sleep deprived parents?

[Ifeelbloodyawful]

That's just for supporting one another and is a place to offload about how truly shit sleep deprivation is?

Not a thread for being told to try this/do that/CIO/read this book/try a dummy/try formula/my babies have all slept beautifully since X old (), etc?

Sometimes I don't want "solutions", I just want understanding. Just want a place to be understood, consoled, have a moan, and to remind each other that "this too shall pass" (please!) and in the meantime there is coffee...

So is it just me? Currently surviving on 3-4 hours a night, if I am lucky, and I want to give up, but obviously not an option!

I'm with you OP!

DS (4.5 months) has slept no more than an hour at a time - and even then sometimes only in my arms - since he was 10 weeks old and I'm shattered! Also won't settle for anyone but me and cries inconsolably whenever I leave a room, which doesn't leave much opportunity for a break, despite numerous willing volunteers. Coffee is my best friend

How old is/are your LOs?

3yr old twins. Average 5hrs broken sleep each night I am so tired. I never had caffine before children . . . Now I need it to function! I have no solutions (obviously or I'd have done something ) although slightly worried I'm not helping your possitive it will pass mentality

I've had 3 hours of broken sleep and LO is now asleep in my arms. I'm too tired to try & put him in his cot (& don't want him to wake so I have to entertain him!) Really wish I had a coffee nearby

I had 2 DC. Oldest never slept until he was 7 months old and then never disturbed us at night again. Youngest slept 12 hours round from 6 weeks until she turned 18 months and has never slept the whole night since.

It passes and you turn back into a regular human being again, eventually!

My LO is only 19 days so was prepared for the sleep deprivation, but for the last two days she's decided she's not interested in daytime naps, she prefers falling asleep between the hours of 7-11pm which makes for a fun night!

What is sleep!?

Currently feel like crying with joy as it's finally the afternoon and I'm drinking my 5th ish coffee hot as DS (up since 5 and about 5 wake ups overnight) has finally gone for a nap. Guaranteed tomorrow morning when he goes to the childminder ill have to wake him up to get ready. Never thought I'd be the kind of person who would say that their ideal day was anything that followed a good night's sleep, but here I am!

Yes I would like to join please! Mine isn’t completely due to DS, I am also having a Crohn’s flare which is getting me up every 2-3 hours to go to the loo. I am bloody knackered.

7 week old will only sleep at 9.20pm, no sleep in the day at all - just screaming 👍🏻

🙋🏻‍♀️

12 month old ds regularly decides to that 3-4am is a delightful time to wake up. He also takes great pleasure in waking every hour or so to be nursed until I get into bed with him, then I can hope for a solid 3 hours.

I got more sleep during the newborn stage!

I have found my people 🙌🏻👋🏻 pfb has never been a good sleeper - it'll get better they said - at 4 months - at six months when you introduce solids - at 8 months - yada yada yada. 19 months in not one night has been a sleep through - the best I can hope for / get is up six times and can be shushed back to sleep after 20 mins - oh and that's with a 5.30 start . The worst - awake at 12 ready to start the day .

I'd like to join please! 19 month old who's only slept through the night about 4 times in his life.
So, so tired and also tired of peoples/In-laws 'advice'

Can I join? DS is 4.5 months and going through sleep regression. No predictability to his wake ups at all. And now I can't bloody sleep because I'm lying there waiting for the next wake up. It seems pointless falling asleep for half an hour. Which means on the odd night he does sleep well I can't fall asleep anyway!

I hear you about the advice. Teach him to self settle they said. I have painstakingly taught DS to self settle using the baby whisperer techniques. He is perfectly capable of settling himself back to sleep. Does it beautifully during daytime naps. Just chooses not to at night so after all the bloody pick up put down, all I have to show for it is a sodding bad back.

18 month old who's hit a lovely sleep regression, and has molars coming through, and has an ear infection. I've seen 4am pretty much every morning for the last 3 weeks.... he was such a good sleeper before, so I know we've been spoilt. But still 😭 plus husband has been ill and in and out of hospital, so doing it all by myself.

@DoveBlue Ditto on all of that, except I only have one and he’s nearly 3. Killing me. Absolutely killing me. Power to you, sister.

I'll join! Youngest ds is almost 3 and slept all night for the first time last night!! Though i kept on waking up in expectation No expectation it will happen again but i would love it as I'm sooo tired...

13 month old DD.

She woke and fed every 3 hours as a newborn (not bad I thought), still 3 hourly now.

for everyone.

Hey there mumma, I know how you feel! Deep sympathies! My little man is 10 months, wakes up every 2 hours on the dot at night. Has done since four months old love him to bits but it’s breaking me! I’m actually like a zombie most days.

I get so wound up by people telling me ‘have you tried...[insert stooooopid suggestion here] ..’

I honestly believe they will sleep through when they are ready. It’s so unbearably tough... but hang in there ❤️

@rottiemum88 my youngest is 4.5 months too. My eldest is almost three. In hindsight eldest was a pretty good sleeper (and was self settling by this age but with no "training" he just did it - but then he went back to feeding to sleep at around six months) although he didn't sleep through until he was two and a bit.

This new baby is sent from HELL go kill me I swear. A good night is four wakes. But often it is much more and when she does sleep she has to touch me so she wakes me constantly shifting in her sleep (and likewise I have to stay still or I wake her, even if I am horribly uncomfortable). Beyond tired now! And it's so much harder being sleep deprived with a second child to look after. She doesn't much like being with anyone but me, so no one can really help!

Sending much love and solidarity to you all. Although it is nice to feel less alone (everyone I know with babies a similar age to mine seems to have a sleeper!). I feel utterly hopeless right now and too tired to really try and tackle the sleep issue, even if I had a clue how.

My eldest also trying to drop his nap now so that's fun. Nevermind though, I just managed a hot cup of tea and a few hobnobs while DC2 napped in sling and eldest played in sandpit and now he's watching a movie (bad mum!).

@tympanic I keep telling myself it will get better someday keep going . . . one day they will be teenagers and we won't be able to get them out of bed

No more babies for me. Dentist asked if I could be pregnant the other day (needed an X-RAY) and I went on a long rant how it would be a cold day in hell before I let my husband near me again. I bet he wished he hadn't asked.

Thank you for this! I'm just trying to drum up the courage for the torture that is to come. Number 3 due any day, number 1 was what I thought was a terrible sleeper, but then number 2 came along. In my delirium I actually decided at one point that going to bed was futile and depressing as I wouldn't sleep anyway. My family didn't believe me that I was living on 2-3 hours of broken sleep a night. I've never prayed before but I'm giving it a shot that this next one is more understanding of my needs

You are not a bad mum for letting them watch TV. Remember that sleep deprivation is used as torture. Enlisting some technological help is not a weakness!!

I feel you op. I feel you.
My youngest didn't sleep through until past age 3 and that was two years ago and I'm still recovering.
He needed cuddling to sleep every night. Fine when tiny, but awkward when he was a heavy sweaty preschooler. Any form of sleep training just resulted in extended periods of crying and I was too broken to battle it out with him and it was affecting his older brother.
There was no solution. Nothing worked until one day the little git just decided to go to bed on his own and then slept through till morning. It was the same day he also relented and decided he would potty train after all.
Everything has been a fight with him. We're almost at the end of reception year and he still thinks that of he argues enough and behaves badly enough I'll let him off school. It hasn't occurred to him that the worse he is then the more determined I get to get rid of him for the day make him go.
I love him, but he tests every nerve I have.