If you're female AIBU to ask if you're ok with male health professionals at all times and in any scenario?

[DockerDre]

It's just that question really.

“Can you really see no reason why a woman might want a woman examining her?”

None whatsoever.

I think the men see you as an object.

None whatsoever

Fair play to you owning being thick.

Are we including transgender doctors? :) I think all that matters is that they are trustworthy and a great doctor

I went to Uni with medics and knew them socially for a few years after they qualified - I heard the stories at the pub and the fact that they were male did matter, I never heard any of the females tell similar stories - I prefer to see a female. Professional they were not!

To be honest I tend to go with whoever can see me soonest / at the most convenient time. Male or female I trust that they will give me the same standard of care. I've had a breast exam undertaken by a male GP before but any gynae exams or smears have always been undertaken by a female hcp, purely by circumstance. My mum tends to be my chaperone (28 and perfectly able, but I love my mum and she's a nosy cow who likes to know things as they happen!) but she always bristles and feels uncomfortable whenever she finds out the hcp is male. I am trying to convert her to my gender-neutral mindset but she's difficult to convince!

“It is about feeling comfortable and relaxed when you are in a vulnerable situation or talking about something deeply personal. Having someone the same sex (gender not relevant) can also make people feel better understood, because the person has the same biology so will 'get' it.”

We are talking about strangers who are medical professionals. The shape of their genitals should never be relevant. Nor should their age or skin colour.

“Feeling more comfortable” isn’t an excuse for discrimination at the public purse.

Streetwise Hercules, a total lack of empathy isn’t something to be proud of!

I used to be bothered. Then I went into prom at 6 months pregnant and ended up in hospital on bed rest for 4 months. Gave up on bothering who it was after a couple of days

Fair play to you owning being thick.

Hear hear.

“Fair play to you owning being thick.”
Are you always abusive to anyone with a differing view?

Interesting OP as I assumed you were talking about intimate exams. Not a perspective I have heard before but whilst I don’t believe in generalisations I can see why their bed side manor upset you.

Personally I’m not bothered, ivf and an elcs with about 20+ people in the room put paid to that, but I fully support the right to choose either way for any reason.

Doesn't matter to me at all so long as they are qualified and good at their job.
I had an elective bilateral mastectomy last year had three surgeons involved - all Male. It was 12 months of consultations before the surgery requiring clothes off, photos, measurements etc. All were excellent and gave me the best surgery I could ever have expected.

I couldn't give a toss who they are, what gender they are or identify as, my concern is that they're qualified to do the job. I've had amazing male and female HCPs and I work with amazing male and female HCPs.

Everyone deserves to feel comfortable and safe though when seeing an HCP so my DH for instance asked for a male GP when he had a testicular lump and lots of the residents where I work are ladies who only have female HCPs.

No.

Sex is a lot more than just ‘the shape of their genitals’. There is a lot more to it. But even if that were to be the only thing that was different, the form of those genitals still matters. Because the vast majority of violent crime and virtually all sexual crime is carried out by those with a penis shape, you know. And plenty of those offenders are professional people.

I can discuss anything with a man , but physical exam, no

I have no issue, I've had a baby and it was men that sorted me out then due to some complexities.

You sound like you've had a bad time, but I'm struggling to believe all the Male doctors were abusve as you describe. One bad apple, Male or female sure, but a number of them, all Male, abusing you, being angry at you? That doesn't sound right if I'm honest, especially as others would have been present.

@StreetwiseHercules So, based on my experience which I shared up thread, a 9 year old who wants her mummy should have that wish denied and it’s perfectly fine for her to be held down and have her legs held open by two adult men whilst another inserts a speculum, leaves her bleeding and in pain whilst her carries out an internal - is a bigot and there’s no reason she should have wanted a female there to explain what was happening to her or to reassure her?

I prefer female and choose female GP/obgyn but I wouldn't really be that bothered if I had to see a male doctor. The male intern at my son's birth was way more understanding of me and what I needed than my female obgyn (his wife had just given birth and I think he was still in the Prince Harry phase of awe and amazement).

I think it’s bigotry to have an issue with the sex of the person providing healthcare

You are a bigot if you don't think women are entitled to bodily autonomy.

Tits, arse or fanny - don't want a manny

“Feeling more comfortable” isn’t an excuse for discrimination at the public purse

Why do you have such an issue with consent and boundaries? Why are you wanting to force people into situations where they might avoid seeing a doctor altogether due to having no say in who gets to perform intimate examinations on them? Why do you lack any emotional intelligence?

It doesn't bother me, however I think it probably would have in the past

The only time my heart completely sank because the doctor was male was when I referred to have them try to find my coil - and that was because it was a male doctor who I both knew and found very attractive (he did immediately offer to get someone else when he realised it was me and we knew each other but I declined - still very embarassing when I saw him a few days later

Happy to see HCPs of either sex, for anything.

What I'm more concerned about is that they should be competent and that fact doesn't appear to apply to one sex over the other.