If you're female AIBU to ask if you're ok with male health professionals at all times and in any scenario?

[DockerDre]

It's just that question really.

For anything intimate/where I am feeling physically vulnerable I prefer women. Having had multiple surgeries in the last year it has twice been male nurses who argued with me when I wanted to get up and put at least underwear on soon after I came round. They simply couldn't comprehend why I might feel vulnerable and uncomfortable lying in a cubicle with just an untied gown on and unknown men (staff, patients and visitors) walking past.

For any appointment or examination that may make me feel uncomfortable I request a woman doctor or nurse. That's woman by sex not gender.

Also I've been in emergencies with women who only want women treating them. If the crass bell is pulled, everyone piles in no matter what state of undress you are in or if you've requested female only.
I think sometimes we do them as disservice as they are not expecting this and are then traumatised by all the men in the room.
I've also seen them (and their husbands) complain.

I take it you’re referring to labour and childbirth emergencies? I agree it should be talked through with women beforehand so it’s not a shock and so that they’re actually properly consenting to have men come in the room. I also think certain things can be done to make the situation less distressing. When the emergency button was pressed for myself in labour the midwife threw a blanket over my waist before everyone piled in, I was then explicitly asked permission for the male dr to examine me, the other people in the room also stood back to allow privacy. Anything else would have been below standard care in my opinion.

Although if it is completely usual for women to be leaving ‘traumatised’ from having males involved in their care then that is extremely good reason to consider whether it needs to be a female-only sphere.

I would much prefer a woman (sex: female) to do a smear and anything that might hurt down there.. I just think they get it and are a bit more careful. My mum's breast cancer was treated by a male consultant, I'm bloody grateful to him and would happily have a male or female consultant for anything.

I never had a problem with this until I had a male nurse perform an ECG on me and ask that I be topless. I tried to cover my modesty and he gave me a lecture on how me being embarrassed was potentially stopping him from finding out what was wrong with me he made me feel pathetic. 6 months later I had another ECG by a female nurse in a different hospital who ensured I was covered at all times, told a colleague off for not knocking before entering and then locked the door to ensure we wouldn't be disturbed by anyone.

I've never been in a situation where I've not been ok with it, but can only think of a handful of relevant examples where the HCP happened to be male:

Male GP examined my breasts when I was worried about a change.

Male midwife did a sweep with DS1.

Male GP checked stitches at my 6 week check.

Ds2 labour - Male doctor and his male student shadower, examined me a few times during labour, supervised delivery of DS2 and stitched me up afterwards, with doctor giving student full running commentary of my complex tears!! I think if I hadn't just given birth I might have cared a bit more that they were openly discussing the mess down there in front of me!

I am but I think everyone should be allowed to make their own choice

If I have a choice I choose female especially with more intimate things. I just feel more comfortable. I'm happy to see a male dr for most other things. I would hate a male midwife for example.

Yes

Apologies I've not read the thread as the last page of replies implies that people are still just answering the OPs question so....

Yes I wpiod be comfortable with someone of either chromosomal make up to provide me with medical treatment of any kind.

I have never experienced any kind of abuse (sexual or otherwise) or trauma by any other human so I'm sure that influenced my feelings.

I've had a breast exam by a male doctor and a smear performed by a male doctor.

I also chose my language carefully as these days its not just as easy as saying I wpiodnt mind a man, I also wouldnt mind a trans woman, trans man or gender neutral individual, however that's my personal choice because of my set of circumstances but I do not agree that I shoiod not have that choice.

When I was 18 and first year uni student I was registered with the university doctor and went to see him suffering from severe anxiety which presented as nausea and stomach pains. Doctor (male) asked if I could be pregnant. Explained impossible as I hadn't had sex. Doctor then said I needed an internal. Told the female nurse she could leave. I've never forgotten the look on her face as she refused and said she needed to stay.

It wasn't until years later when I heard that he had been struck off for misconduct that I realised I had been sexually assaulted by this doctor.

This happened years ago. Sometimes I see a male gp. Sometimes a female gp. Fortunately my gp practice has both, so I make my choice depending on what I'm going for. In an emergency, there's usually plenty of other health professionals around so I probably wouldn't care that much. But I want the choice.

I am happy to have an appropriately qualified and experienced HCP of male sex in most circumstances.

However I once had to have a barium enema x-ray so a tube inserted into the back passage held in by a balloon. I was then on a table that spun and turned me upside down etc. I saw a male member of staff going in and out of the room where this would take place and, I can't explain why but I found him repulsive. There is no way I would have had the procedure if he was to do it. Thankfully, when I asked if he would be present, I was told it was females who were doing mine anyway. It wasn't males I objected to per se, it was this particular male.

I've also had a cervical polyp removed privately by a male gynaecologist who also carried out a smear test afterwards. I continued to pay for a smear every 6 months for a few years because it was so painless. I'm more embarrassed and in great blooming pain when the female nurse at my GP practice does my smear test.

I'm more concerned about competence than social constructed ideas about privacy.

Yes

I'm conflicted on this. I'd feel more comfortable with a female HCP, but the two worst gynaecological experiences I've had were both inflicted on me by women doctors. Both very rough, and one simply didn't listen when I told her that she wouldn't be able to take an endometrial biopsy without anaesthetic as my cervix goes into spasm. She tried to shove a sound through anyway, it was agony and I passed out. The male gynecologists who have cared for me have been much more gentle and listened.

I think for me, it isn't about sex. It's about respect, empathy and kindness.

I had a male consultant have to artificially break my waters. My cervix was high up - it was incredibly incredibly traumatic - I was on gas and air in stirrups and he was a big strong guy - he was so forceful my whole body shook and he was pushing and pushing - he did catch and break them - but he had to use a lot of strength I don't know the procedure and how necessary it was - but I was bruised really badly

It didn't used to bother me but as I've got older I prefer a female device intimate examinations. Having said that, last week a female Gp examined me wearing gloves and hurt me. I had to ask her to go get some ky jelly !! Following examination it was uncomfortable to sit down..... And I told her so !!

I'm not fussed. Have had a man doing my smear, didn't care - they're doing a job after all. Having had female and male GPs, I'd take the male - three female GPs dismissed a long-standing mental health issue before a male doctor was the one who followed it up for me, kept me involved and engaged with the process, and who advocated for me when I needed it.

Personally yes I would be comfortable with a male hcp in any situation.

However I understand why some aren't and respect the right of others to request a hcp of their same sex for medical procedures.

Also I am a hcp and am sometimes asked to take over a patient from a male colleague, as the patient has requested a female - I am fine with this.

I'm female and don't mind male doctors at all.
I figure it's their job, and they've seen it all before lol

I had a male midwife
To be fair I didn’t like him very much and he made some mistakes one of which could have been serious
Not because he was a man he was just not a very good midwife IMO

My last gynae was also a man and he did not fix my womb problems either

But apart from those 2 instances I have no issues seeing a man for anything

I've had a lot of interaction with the medical profession for various things throughout my life. I have never felt uncomfortable with any Dr or other hcp of either sex for any procedure. So yes I would be okay with a male,in any scenario.

However, obviously people have their own issues, horror stories, anxieties and I absolutely think that everyone has the right to ask for a male or female if they choose, regardless of their reasons for doing so.

It doesnt matter to me if I am the one needing care however I work in an environment where I might be required to carry out questionnaires with men regarding their sexual health/ activity and I have to say I would not be comfortable doing that without another colleague present.

I remember in labour while not dilating, this man ( a doctor) came in and shoved his fist up me to check whether I was dilating (despite the midwives telling him I wasn't). It was only then that I was sent for EMCS. I'll never forget the pain of it, nor just the sheer feeling of helplessness when he was doing it to me. My consultant was a man (who operated on me), I have a vague recollection of there being other men in the room, but mainly I recall the women there - my nurse and my aunt (also a midwife). I don't have a 'thing' about needing only women, but I'd like the option I guess.

Yes