Partner planning weekend away soon after birth

[bangbingbong]

Quite honestly not sure if IABU in being annoyed that my DP is currently planning a weekend away with his brother soon after I give birth.

My 2nd, DPs 1st, child due September 15th and he's currently planning a Friday - Monday trip away to Ibiza from the 27th September.

I've made it quite clear how I feel about this. That it's unfair to leave me so soon after I give birth, potentially by C-Section (my 1st was delivered by section and I was in for a week after delivery). He says it's not bad, that I'll have family for support and it's only for a couple of days.

I don't think I'm U at all but I guess I'm just looking for perspective. Would you be okay with this?

No! Not okay at all. The baby could be late; anything could happen. Sounds like a ridiculous idea to me....

No, of course not. Why can’t he go before September?

I wouldn’t be ok with this. You might have family to support you but you’re having his child and he should be the main figure of support- especially so soon after the birth.

I would absolutely NOT be OK with this.
It doesn't matter how much support you have, he should be babymooning and bonding not fucking off on a piss up.

That's incredibly selfish. You'll need all the help you can get, especially if you've had a section. If you're overdue you might be giving birth that weekend.

So what if you've got family to help? It's his own child!

No, you could still be pregnant at that point!

Is he mad?!? Totally unacceptable.

@TheGrey1houndSpeaks
I asked why he couldn't go before and he said the reason for the trip is for his brothers 21st birthday.

Absolutely not. I would be making an ultimatum at this point so he could assess his priorities.

Not ok.

No you are not.
He is crazy to even contemplate such.
He just hasn't a clue, baby may well have a due date, but how many arrive on them?
It's his place to be with you and the baby.

What are they going for anyway? You are the one carrying the baby and going through birth. The least he can do is support you.

Nope. Not on. He has other priorities now. Tell him to get his act in order 😳

Nope. I was fine physically after my three and could have coped, but why the bloody hell should i?

YANBU!!!!

That is utterly ridiculous and unbelievably selfish. Perhaps you should tell him that you're planning a week away straight after giving birth, leaving him to look after the baby on his own. Maybe that'll help sharpen his mind.

All these inconsiderate selfish men on MN. Why do women breed with them & then complain.

I'd be OK with it if there was good reason and I would have alternative help available. I'd be pissed off he just planned a regular weekend away so soon after the birth for no reason.

Good reason would be along the lines of best friend's wedding, family funeral, accompanying elderly mother to hospital.

Holy shit. What’s he like otherwise?

lord I thought I was lax on the boys trips but hell no!!! He’s ok missing the first few days of his child’s life wtf

Is there a large age gap? I did ibiza when I was 19 and childless

If mine had suggested this I would have left him. Just shows how much he cares about you and his new baby, not a good start to parenthood. When will he let you down next?

His priority should be with you and the baby. I think it says a lot about him that he could so easily leave you on your own to cope with HIS child, so he can have a holiday.

Oh and I also agree that you should leave him with the baby, "just for a couple of days" as soon as he gets back. How hard can it be right?

Has he always been selfish and thoughtless OP? Why are you with him?

Oh my god, what a dick.