To think that if you private rent your life should not be dictated to by the landlord whose mortgage you are paying

[Nursejackie1]

So many of us are stuck in private renting with no choice paying over the odds, while landlords are making a mint. Most landlords have all these rules that you can’t decorate without permission, can’t even put a wall hanging up without asking. Often can’t or need permission to have pets, have regular inspections. I pay loads for my home and due to that cannot save a deposit. My kids have never had their bedrooms decorated in the way I would like.. having to stick with plain magnolia. Why should somebody else decide whether my kids get to grow up with a family pet or not? AIBU to think that if you are paying somebodies mortgage for them then while you are in that house you should be able to treat it as your own within reason and not have your life dictated to and controlled by them?

Lots is this debate is about luck of course. My sister bought a 3 bed house in 2000 for half of what I paid for a one bed flat in 2006.

And that was just life circs. She met someone so could get a mortgage for 2 whereas I was single and it took me much longer to save up, only managed it just when the prices peaked and then I lost out. Lots of this is luck and personal circs

It’s not about areas being not perfect it’s about them being complete shit holes. Also, renters are a huge part of society. Not every can or wants to buy a house. It’s impossible for some. If renters could feel that the house they are paying for is their home while they are there there would be more people happy to rent. Instead renters are treated like the scum of society, have silly rules imposed on them by those lucky enough to have bought a house and rarely feel like the vast amount of money they are spending is going anywhere, not even towards a home for the limited time.
My choices are this - move to a shit area which nowadays I mean really shit. Rubbish bags and mattresses etc strewn all over the paths, people crammed into flats in converted houses on top of each other, loud disrespectful neighbours, loads of the homes in these areas a houses of multiple occupancy for offenders and the schools are poor performing and even the kids eventually going to school is a bloody risk. Sorry but I work in these areas that people are suggesting I should move to to save and that’s the reality. Even if I did do that it would take a few years to save a deposit and that would be the kids childhoods done. I don’t think it’s a great choice. I grew up in council houses but I am telling you now the areas available around here that I could rent cheaply are not what they used to be. No I work too bloody hard to give my kids that kind of life. All you homeowners preaching ... if you happened to lose your home would you 1) rent in the area I described above for years to save another deposit or 2) sacrifice becoming a homeowner and private rent to give your kids the best life and chances you can and therefore the best chances for when they are older? Even if you are living an illusion. It’s disgusting that these are the only options for many. And as an extra kick in the teeth you are made to feel inferior and like an unwanted guest in the home you are paying for.

dancingbear why is charging people to live in a property capitalising on anyone’s misfortune? The reality is everyone has to pay to live in a property, whether via mortgage or renting. What do you suggest a landlord do? Bearing in mind we have established private rentals are very much needed. I was paying my landlord £550 pm rent - should I have paid £300, £400, nothing?

@Tobe123 9 years ago ... sorry

What I’m saying is that being a home owner should not be the only way to have a “home”. There will never be a time when everyone in the country is able to buy. There are many reasons why. But do believe me when I say that it’s got nothing to do with how hard I work or what I contribute to society because whoever you are and however many houses you may own at the end of the day you are always going to need an experienced and skilled nurse at some point in your lives. Renting is a way of life for a massive section of society and everybody should have the right to have a “home”. As long as you are respectful, look after the property there is no reason to be made to feel inferior and to have the home owners having power and control over every day aspects of people’s lives.

You're taking this too personally OP.

No one is doing anything to make you feel inferior or like an unwanted guest, if you feel like that then it's down to you. You're doing a valuable job, doing the best by your kids, nothing inferior about that.

You call the LLs rules silly, but refuse to acknowledge why they exist. They exist because of crappy tenants, not landlords making up rules
just for the sake of it. You are likely to have luck in life that some property owners don't.

Why do you feel like your money isn't going anywhere? It's actually doing a pretty important thing by housing you and your children in a place that you actually want to live. It's buying you a service that means you don't have to worry about it when any of the many things that can go wrong with a property do go wrong.

Have you even asked your landlord about doing the things you want to do, or are you automatically assuming the answer will be no because it's in the contract?

NURSEJACKIE1

I really object to your vitriol about LL, many here have given balanced views and opinions, explained calmly the other side of the coin, and you still sound full of hate..

I have yet to meet a LL, (or indeed anyone else) who believes tenants are inferior...that is frankly just your issue.

It is not LL's fault you are unhappy about the situation you find yourself in, what exactly do you want to happen, someone to GIVE you their home? Wouldn't we all?

You are rude and agressive to a group of people who are not doing anything illegal, or immoral, and paying their taxes. you should redirect your anger.

It’s hard not to take some of the responses on here personally. Have you read them?

Has something happened to make you feel so sad and angry about it recently? Or just the build up of worrying about having to move out potentially at every renewal? (That's the bit I hated the most. That and the impending battle with every LA over returning deposits, hence my obsessive photographing when we moved in!)

It shouldn't be impacting this much on every day life. Is there one thing the LL could do to make you feel better?

How am I rude an aggressive exactly can you quote me? A lot of rude people on here I don’t think I am one of them and I don’t think I have said anything rude or nasty towards landlords. I am discussing the situation ie the system and how people who rent are most often not able to feel they are at home even though they are spending most of their salary on their rent.

I’m not losing sleep over it. You are all dramatising everything I am saying. I have an opinion and I am discussing it not sitting here hyperventilating over it. Calm yourself down dear

Why do you keep mentioning the money?
You are paying for a roof over your head. That's the same as someone with a mortgage.
The percentage of your salary is dependent on area, house size and style.

All your choices.

It’s not about areas being not perfect it’s about them being complete shit holes

But that was our reality.

The studio flat that had a black painted shower room (I.e everything painted in black gloss including the toilet, basin and shower tray and glass) in a complete shithole area was at the time all we could afford but the mortgage was cheaper than the rent we were paying in another studio flat in an equally shit hole area.

We were there 6 months did it up then sold and made a few thousand (more than we could have saved in the time) and moved onwards and upwards.

Lots of people I know rent. Even those who would be considered home owners.

I will more than likely rent after we sell our house.

I wouldn’t want to have the inflexibility of some European countries.

I want a 6 month rent at the most then I should be in a position to move on. If the choice is signing up to a 3 year rental or going in to an Airbnb then an Airbnb would win every time.

Having looked around I think a lot of the rental market is shrinking because of the government policies (hence the higher rents)

However the flood of properties on the market due to the government policies to reduce landlords isn’t happening.

A lot of people are just turning their rental properties into an Airbnb

Oliversmums army would you like that to be your reality for the entirety of your kids childhoods?

. Because I don’t have that I have to be treated like an inferior member of society that has to go asking like a child to hang a frigging picture up in the home I pay to live in.

Pretty rude.

contraceptionismyfriend how is renting and paying a mortgage the same thing, a mortgage you have something to show for it, renting you have fuck all. Stop saying it's all about choices omg!!!! Not everyone has a choice on their life! Turn it around if someone came into money and won the lottery and brought a house that is not a choice that is luck so stop making out people's misfortune and buying a house is a choice! Some people work more hours than others and they still have less to show for it! That's not a choice that's just luck and the way life works for some and not others

Of course I've read them.

It comes across as nasty when you show no understanding of the reasons why the rules are there, instead just calling them silly and making out as if landlords are doing this to you just to make you feel inferior.

Tenants will never feel completely 'at home' because that feeling also comes with downsides and responsibilities that tenants simply don't have. It's up to you whether you choose to look at the benefits of renting along with the downsides, or if you choose to focus solely on the negative.

And you still won't answer whether you've actually asked your ll if you can put up pictures or not. You're complaining about something that might not even be a problem now that youve proven yourself to be trustworthy as a tenant.

Pretty rude.

I don’t see anything rude about that. Pretty accurate.

Because you have to pay to have a roof with heating, electric and water. That's the deal. You want a house you hand over money.

As long as you are respectful, look after the property

Therein lies the problem.
Because the house doesn't belong to them, tenants don't always look after the place as if it were their own.
Standards of decorating for example vary wildly. A house can be ruined with poor workmanship.

It's up to you whether you choose to look at the benefits of renting

For the lifelong renter there are precious few benefits. Or perhaps more accurately the negatives significantly outweigh them.

I’d hate to be in the OPs position. I can’t imagine many homeowners would.

@Tobe123 how is it luck ? My daughter currently has a job in a Chinese takeaway she doesn’t like the hours and do she’s got another one. It’s not rocket science and at 16 she’s as unskilled as they come

nursejackie1 ignore the assholes on this thread

Also, for put pictures up on walls, these are ace...

www.amazon.co.uk/Command-17205-12PK-Picture-Hanging-17205-12pk/dp/B00OI6NQUI?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

I want a home for my money. Is that too much ask? Seems it is