Zebra crossings

[TheZebraCrosser]

I was under the impression that when driving, stopping to let a pedestrian cross on a zebra crossing (white stripes on road, big flashing Belisha beacons) was in fact mandatory, not discretionary.

So why did some twat in a van holler 'could have put your hand up to say thank you you ignorant sod' as I (a pedestrian) sauntered across the other day.

I have noticed (as a motorist) that more and more pedestrians are now scuttling across zebra crossings almost apologetically while mouthing thank you s and waving.

This is all very well and sweet of them but it leaves me a bit bemused as they have a right to cross anyway.

I'm wondering now, if, when I get to the end of temporary traffic lights, would I be advised to 'thank' the person waiting at the other end for not jumping the red light? To thank someone for giving way at a roundabout if you gave right if way anyway?

And then there are people who step out into the road with no crossing at all without so much as batting an eyelid and scream abuse if you don't dodge them by a wide enough margin.

Help needed.

OP I agree that thanking drivers for stopping at a zebra crossing has only become widespread in the last few years.

And the Highway Code says

Zebra crossings. As you approach a zebra crossing

look out for pedestrians waiting to cross and be ready to slow down or stop to let them cross
you MUST give way when a pedestrian has moved onto a crossing
allow more time for stopping on wet or icy roads
do not wave or use your horn to invite pedestrians across; this could be dangerous if another vehicle is approaching
be aware of pedestrians approaching from the side of the crossing.

So yes you stop if someone is waiting to cross.

Well thank you all (or 95 % of you) - that last post from notmypuppy has actually reduced me to tears.

I have fought really hard all my life to do my best and over come my disadvantages. And still cowardly bullying bitches abound. Truly well done MN.

As you were.

OP, I think it’s similar to when you accidentally bump into someone. Yes, it was an accident, but it’s nevertheless good manners to apologise. I have to keep repeating this to DD1 (10) when she accidentally hurts her little sister or a friend, that I know she didn’t mean to do it but she should nevertheless apologise.

I'm sorry you're upset, OP. AIBU can get a little too snide/personal sometimes.

And I agree with your point OP.

I remember in the 70's when a school friend of mine was killed on a Pelican Crossing in my village. They're just too dangerous for both drivers and pedestrians because everyone has to be on double alert.
My local shopping town has five of these stupid crossings in less than a mile through the main street. Can you imagine how many people are just wandering across them on a Saturday?
Nightmare.

@Lizzie48 That's exactly how I see it too. In fact most British people will say sorry if you bump into them, too. Incidentally the book "Watching the English" is a great read for cultural norms like this. There's often no rhyme or reason to them, but they're just the done thing. Might be interesting to you, OP?

Notmypuppy You should be ashamed of yourself with that last disablist post, which I’ve reported. That was downright nasty.

Everyone has to be in double alert??? It is not hard as a driver to be aware of people waiting to cross or crossing. You just have to be ordinarily alert. And I live in a place with lots of zebra crossings.

If you get people just standing on the edge of a crossing chatting but looking like they're going to cross the road it becomes a game of are they, aren't they? Then if you stop, because you think they ARE going to cross, you get irate drivers behind pipping at you because you've stopped as you are waiting to see if the people standing at the edge of the crossing.....

Actually thunderpunt was the original disabling who needs the shaming. I've reported it / her too.
Not my puppy was just re posting.

Well done both of you. Your're both obviously very lovely people.

They don’t have to stop unless a pedestrian is actually on the crossing. I always thank drivers for stopping and letting me cross.

So big of you to make yourselves feel better by trying to make someone else with a disability feel bad.

Really big mature behaviour @Thunderpunt @NotMyPuppy.

Feel sorry for any DC you're bringing up. Do you let them feel it's ok to mock and belittle disabled people trying to do their best in the workplace?

I might be autistic and pedantic but I'm not a bullying coward.

You should feel ashamed.

jessica I stop always. And if drivers behind peep you, they are in the wrong.
You should always stop if someone is waiting. If I have a young kid whose hand I am holding, I am not going to step out and risk a car not stopping. So stop if someone is waiting.

I was always taught when I was learning to drive that you have to slow down when approaching a zebra crossing and stop if a pedestrian steps on the kerb preparing to cross the road. And that is what drivers mostly did then. Drivers have become far more impatient and entitled since then.

Drivers pretty much still drive like that where I live. Friends visiting from London always comment on it.

In answer to your actual (rather painfully worded) question, technically YANBU. The driver shouldn't have shouted at you and you shouldn't have to thank him.

But It's a shame that you're dismissing a nice thing that most people do (i.e. the thanking) with such disdain and vitriol.

Is that aimed at me St Charlotte? Have you RTFT? You think I am disdainful and vitriolic?
While having a nice little dog about the perfectly fine working of the op.

Why do so many of you get a kick out of being gratuitously nasty?

Does it make you feel better?
What is wrong with you?

*dig

I rest my case.

I rest mine also.

Can you not answer a civil question?

Guilty as charged I take it.

And if you think reasonable discussion and expression of opinion is disdainful and vitriolic - ether (a) you don't understand the meaning or (b) god help us all.

And you say YANBU

The AIbu is whether it's reasonable to cross the road at a zebra crossing without abuse if you don't wave your hand to the driver who has graciously decided to follow the law and stop to let a pedestrian cross.

Actually I hold my hands up - my answer should simply have been "yes". Apologies for not recalling the exact wording.

But I have read the whole thread which is why I stand by "disdain and vitriol". Now directed at me I see.

You have an odd understanding of disdain and vitriol in that case, if you have RTFT.

Nothing has been directed at you so please don't project your own feelings onto me.