To ask if you call your DH everyday when you get off work?

[Justcurious1]

A colleague of mine phones her DH everyday as soon as she gets off work, literally as soon as she gets out of the door. We get off at the same time everyday, and she phones him aswell in her lunch break. I know it's none of my business, but I'm just curious how many of you do this? And if it's a done thing and I'm the odd one out? I sometimes wonder why she doesn't just go home without calling?

DH usually calls me to see how my day is going. I usually only call him for a practical reason.

I message my DP, but I only call him when it's urgent. So twice in 8 years. My EXH made me call him all the time and he was abusive.

No but I do text him a fair amount atm because I’m at home on mat leave. I don’t really like phone calls all that much so if I phoned him, it would be an emergency situation usually.

No, we have never done this. Probably because we got together pre mobile phones so never developed a need to be in constant contact.

DH often goes away for a few days to pursue his hobby and it's rare that we contact each other while he's away. Maybe, just a quick text at bedtime to say goodnight/love you.

We can drive for miles and miles and not speak, but it's an easy silence. I would find it slightly oppressive if he messaged me several times a day, if I'm honest

millythepink, we too can spend time with each other in silence. We like to keep in touch when apart though.

I really don't understand why you would not contact each other when one is away. Don't you miss each other at all? Don't you want to know that everything is ok with the other?

We got together 40 years ago so well before mobile phones. My DH goes away for work sometimes and if he didn't contact me I would be upset and slightly annoyed. He does contact me though because he wants to and likes to speak to me

Some people seem to have a problem with people communicating with each other throughout the day
My husband and I love talking to each other.
It is not a case of co dependency, abuse or all the other reasons people have given .
Some people just enjoy talking to their other halves .

No biggie

I wouldn't do it every single day and definitely not at the same time of day but DH and I do tend to touch base - usually 'I'm on my way home, do we need anything from the shop?/ what do you fancy for dinner?' type of thing.

and sometimes I'll ring him to vent about someone in work who's pissed me off/ tell him something funny that happened.

I dont really see it as a big deal to be honest.

My husband and I speak at least every third hour, maybe more, every day.

We're slightly co-dependent, I guess!

Honestly, I always imagine people who feel the need to be in contact that often are either the type of people who need to narrate every single thing to someone ('Here I am turning on my computer, and now I'm going to make a nice cup of tea while it's starting up, oh, the kettle's already boiled, how nice, now where are the teabags? Oh, here they are, I must be blind? Now, spoons, spoons...' etc etc) or half of the kind of joined-at-the-hip couple who like to go about wearing matching fleeces and don't have many other people in their lives.

Not at all.
We only really speak or text if there's a purpose. we have been together so long that there not much idle chit chat left to say.🤣

@mydogisbest, yes I do miss him sometimes if he's away and I suppose that's when I'll drop him a bedtime text, or he'll send me one. But it's a very fluid thing, there are no set rules. To be honest, I always just assume his day is going fine because he probably would get in touch if something had gone horribly wrong. But we've never been the type of couple who go in for idle chit chat, it's just not us.

Helvetica, we are certainly not joined at the hip nor do we wear matching clothes!

We like talking to each other. Why do some people find that strange? I will talk to others during the day but prefer to talk to DH. We are on the same wavelength, are interested in the same things, get each other's silly jokes etc.

I am surprised too at posters who say after so long there is not much to say. We haven't run out of conversation after 40 years so doubt we ever will.

I often have a whole list of things in my head to tell DH or talk to him about when he gets home from work. He often has a lot of things too and we have to take it in turns to talk about them!

I agree mydogisbest I think DH and I chat a lot/ check in a lot is not because we're joined at the hip or very co-dependent but for the opposite reasons - we each have a lot going on in our separate lives; things that don't involve each other so we find we've a lot to tell each other if that makes sense (different jobs/ different interests on the side/ different friends etc)

We both work from home but in the past dh worked outside the home and we would be in contact for most of the day lol WhatsApp and a phone call or two.

I don’t think it’s why everyone does but we miss each other when we’re not together and I wouldn’t like to go a whole day without speaking to him (and him me)I could if I had to, but I don’t so we don’t!

Honestly, I always imagine people who feel the need to be in contact that often are either the type of people who need to narrate every single thing to someone ('Here I am turning on my computer, and now I'm going to make a nice cup of tea while it's starting up, oh, the kettle's already boiled, how nice, now where are the teabags? Oh, here they are, I must be blind? Now, spoons, spoons...' etc etc) or half of the kind of joined-at-the-hip couple who like to go about wearing matching fleeces and don't have many other people in their lives.

Why the need to run people down just because it's not how you and your DH/DP communicate?

Anyway, yeah sounds like the same as me and my DH @mydogisthebest and @HarryPottersSecretSister

When I said earlier I wouldn't have enough to talk about I suppose I could just talk about really (to me) mundane things but I prefer to save all that for night time. Plus my job is really really busy, don't always get a break so no time for talking or texting unless absolutely necessary. I'm on the phone talking at work nearly all day and I purposely don't have hands free in my car (just so I don't have talk to anyone for a while during commute). Me and my OH haven't run out of things to talk about.

HelveticaSurprise
i am sorry that you have such a dull life and nothing to speak about but some of us have more interesting things to say to their partners

I call after most shifts, see if we need anything from the shops, I work 3 days and the other 4 days when I’m home he’ll give me a call, see how the day is going and just for general chat. Each to their own, we like it.

We used to call and text throughout the day, then we had children and now we do it much less.

Sometimes I do & sometimes I don't. He'll often call me if he's popped out of the office at lunchtime. I don't call him because he may be recording & phone may disturb that (works in TV). He usually lets me know when he's on his way home (so I can start bedtime/get dinner in etc). I do if he's at home when I'm working but not if he's not. We also often send a quick message during the day, just a 'x' or a 'Love you'.

@HelveticaSurprise we aren't like you describe at all,we genuinely like speaking to each other.Maybe all this touches a nerve because you dont communicate with your partner..

I adore my husband after 28 years together, but when we're at work, we're concentrating on work. I suspect that there are very different ideas of both 'communication' and 'work' on this thread -- some people think sending a .gif of a cat playing the guitar and replying 'lol'is communication and presumably have enough leisure at work to do this.

Actually, it would be interesting to hear what the obsessive communicators do for a living.

Definitely not, that’s a bit too clingy for me.

Er no. Don’t speak him during the day whilst at work. Might email occasionally if he needs to know a date of something, kids sports day for example, or to remind him to book holiday off, but that’s about it.

I had a work colleague once, she was married, no kids. Her and her husband used to speak to each other endlessly at work. When he got to work, when she got to work, just before lunch to ask what he wanted for dinner 😂, mid afternoon, when she left work ... yawn.