To think entertaining kids is way easier outside the house?

[Teatimeted]

It's been lovely weather here since Friday afternoon so we've barely spent any time in the house - done a few parks, wildlife zoo type place, Gruffalo hunting (basically a walk in the woods) picnics etc...

On the phone to DM tonight who asks what we've been up to so tell her. I then get ten minutes of "you spoil him, kids have got to learn to entertain themselves, if he got used to playing with toys you wouldn't need a cleaner, what's the point in all his toys if you take him out all weekend, we never did that, you had to entertain yourself"

For info - DS is 2.5, me and DH both work full time (me four days) and we find it really hard to control him indoors. I love being able to take him
places and do fun things - and I won't lie, when I see him charging about outside, I feel relieved because I know he'll sleep well that night.

He just has boundless energy and can't/won't sit drawing or colouring or crafting.

AIBU to keep him outside (with us, engaging, not on our phones, not with one eye on the washing up) for as much time as possible? Or should I be trying to encourage him to enjoy 'quieter' and more 'independent' activities??

My dd likes to run. Not walk, not look at anything. Just run!
We're out every morning for the whole morning regardless of weather doing toddler things. She naps with me (otherwise theres no nap), the in the afternoon I do chores/run errands/play with her.
If we stay in the whole day i spend the whole time from 10am trying not to loose my shit as she tried to jump off the windowsill yet again!

But to answer your actual question, I don't find it easier outside the house, DS tried to run away and falls into nettles/climbs up hills and falls down/chases dogs/generally gets into everything he shouldn't and tries to injure himself

I love to take the kids out and they actually entertain themselves better if they’re outdoors. So I provide the location and they crack on!

When ds was 2, we spent hours in the park while he dug up stones to throw in the river for example. I didn’t come up with this idea - he did. It meant I could collect my thoughts while he busied himself. He never did that sort of thing at home!!!

I think it entirely depends on the children and the activities to be honest! A mix of both is perfect. Mine love to be outside but the equally love to play in the playroom together or snuggle up and watch a movie.

MouseTheDog hope you're joking, though with mn you can never be quite sure

All this talk of boys and girls being totally different is utter crap. My dd is a nightmare at home, but beautifully behaved, engaged and happy when we're out and about getting mucky as possible.

What the heck is this - does she only have girls - stuff? It’s much easier to entertain my two girls outdoors. They love to run and jump and hide and wrestle and get grubby and play football and rugby...

What I would say though is, boys or girls, I see so many kids who are herded about on constant activities and I do think you need a balance. If is really important that kids learn to ‘just be’

Boys and girls are, generally, totally different. Yes, There are some exceptions, but generally. I actually get quite bored of people pretending they're not different.

I was indeed joking. My daughters are like yours, much better out the house than in despite their lack of penises

My two toddlers (17 motnhs apart) can only be entertained outside really. Being inside with them gives me awful anxiety after too long. My girls are fucking lunatics though.

I like to get out. If I don't Ds1 will stare at a screen for hrs and DS 2 will trash the house.

It is ridiculous to say that boys need to be taken outside and are harder to entertain.

When my dd was the same age as your dd(and younger) she needed a lot of input from me. Never sat still. Could play outdoors for hours. That's not unique to boys.

Now she's 4.5, she can entertain herself in the house quite well. It comes with age.

Depends on the kid. With DS1 we used to joke that we had to exercise him as regularly as a puppy when he was young, he loved being outdoors and it tired him out so he slept well. As an adult he still likes to be on the move. DS2 was happy playing indoors.

I think a balance is best . You don’t need to be out all day with a 2 year old . It’s important that they learn how to entertain themselves.
Your mother is just pointing out that perhaps you’re pushing yourself to do too much. I doubt it makes that much difference wherever they spend their time .

Bring on the time when my DS will sit (never mind for Hours..ten mins would be an achievement ) and entertain himself, like others have mentioned. I am told that will come with age.

I totally agree that a mix is best, but I prefer getting my DS out of the house. He is so inquisitive he just loves being outdoors getting up to mischief. Although I know, I do need to make a conscious effort to give him more time to "just be" as we are always so busy and I possibly don't have the best mix.

Two girls - eldest almost 3 and has always been great at independent play, potters around for hours with her toys. DD2 is the complete opposite and cries every single time someone opens the door because she wants to go outside. She exhausting! I knew I could t get that lucky twice

Fellow mother of boys once joked to me that the kids are like dogs - they need to be walked outside at least once a day to stop them from going stir crazy and destroying the house. She wasn't wrong!

Fellow mother of boys once joked to me that the kids are like dogs

I think that applies to everyone. We all sleep better and have better moods for being outside. I know so many mothers of girls who complain that their kids don’t sleep well or not until late at night etc yet they fail to give them decent exercise.

Mine was and still is exactly the same! He has never been one for sedate activities and needs to charge around and burn off energy, otherwise he's a nightmare.

As a result, we've always done a lot with him. Before preschool I would be out several times a week with him and now we usually do one weekday trip somewhere and also at the weekend, often both days.

To an outsider it might look as if he's spoiled but to me it's necessary and I much prefer doing that, than having a shit day trapped in the house!

It doesn't apply to my dd2 iggly.
All day colouring and playing with dolls, then out like a light for 12 hours.

When I was a childminder I spent most of the day outdoors or at sofplays/ village halls.
My house would have been destroyed otherwise! Always had high energy boys and they would be wild indoors.

we never did that,

And there is your answer! You have dared to parent differently to her and she's taken it personally.

I may be wrong, but thus is what jumped out at me.

Its also good for kids to be bored sometimes.

I'm completely with you, OP. I go out with DD (nearly 3) as much as possible and she gets so much out of even just pottering around the park with some sticks!

I think your DM is unrealistic about a 2.5 year old learning to play independently. That's for a bit later.

I don't get her comment about the cleaner, though? What's the connection to DS playing with his toys? (Does she have an issue with your lifestyle generally, do you think?)

and generally speaking - boys are more high energy and boisterous than girls, certainly at a young age.

Of course there will be some girls who are, but from my own experience of friends and families children and observing them at pre school, the girls are generally engaged in something, playing calmly. Whilst the boys are charging about and rolling around on the floor.

Definitely and there’s less mess involved too so it’s a win-win .