Why do some people think paying their childminder is optional?

[ShiveringCoyote]

DSis is a child minder, has been for years. Two sets of parents have asked to leave off paying her for April until next week because "expensive month for them" and " car needs repairs". Its not the first time its happened and she said its very common amongst minders, especially at this time of year and Christmas.

Because society still doesn't generally value 'women's work' or children.

I meant value, not favour. Same thing in practice though probably.

It's the same with school dinners.

She needs to have strong terms in her contract and (difficult bit) stick to them. So no payment, kids turned away if need be.

We are looking moving our daughter from nursery to a cm. one of the questions I ask is how do they want to be paid. They are looking after one of two things most precious to me so want to treat them well. Don’t understand these parents mentality. Your sister still has bills to pay. I’m sure the parents would be onto their employers ASAP if they didn’t get paid.

Does she have contracts with them? Need to state that late payments will incur 10% (or whatever) on top of their fee, and make sure she sticks to it. It's not on at all

It's absolutely not OK and extremely rude! Also smacks of lack of empathy, as these parents should realise that CMs earn a lot less than them, so are less likely to have a buffer. Not that that would make it OK! There was a Twitter campaign a while ago about the crap excuses people give freelancers for not paying. It went along the lines of "Would you say this to the man running the corner shop?". Does your DSis have contracts with each parent? She should include clauses about the consequences of late or non-payment of fees. It's so selfish of these parents!

I agree, woman dominated roles are very under valued.

She does have tight terms in her contract but that's with non payments, these parents are asking to defer payments.

She should have a month in hand, not paid at the end of the month. Then she wouldnt be out of pocket. But she is like millions of self employed businesses who have to wait for their money. It isnt child minder exclusive.

I have no idea. It's partly that those people are probably just CF in general but I do think it's what a PP said though that the work isn't sufficiently valued. I doubt they offered to pay for their car repairs in a few weeks instead as it's been a "expensive month".

My kids nursery adds 10% for late payment - she should try that, they’ll probably find the money if being late will cost them an extra £60

If they're not paying when the contract stipulates they should, it is a non-payment, surely?

OP- what does your DSis say to these parents?

Does she not have a contract with the parents in which her terms are stipulated? Can she not refuse to care for the children in future until payment has been made? Having no child minder might focus their minds on making sure they pay her bills promptly.

It's not a 'deferred' payment, it's a non payment.

She could add a line to contract saying that no credit for any length of time is possible, you're either up to date with payments or in arrears which is chargeable at £ per day.

I think some people think of CM's wages as 'pin money' - obviously they all have husbands to pay for all the important things in life like mortgages and food.

I presume she’d say no and then refuse to look after the children until debts were paid? My childminder friend bills weekly and has then refused to mind children when their parents are more than a week late settling their bill. Funny how they can come up with the money when she threatens that!

Some people view childminders oddly - my friend is often asked to pick up children at short notice by parents who don’t have a contract with her. She then has to explain she can’t due to her ratios or that she can but she has an hourly rate that the parents aren’t keen to pay as they’re just asking her to “help them out”. It’s baffling!

Have just realised your DSis charges in arrears. She should really change that, as she's in a much stronger position then: refusing care due to non-payment of fees is much easier than chasing money for services already delivered, especially if the parents decide to stop sending their kids to her. TBF, the parents are probably the types that think life on a 60k+ income is so much tougher than that of a low earner because "benefits" You haven't said what your DSis currently does in these cases?

She should ask how they would feel if their employers wanted to defer paying their salaries for April.

Expensive month for them but not for the childminder!

She needs to add a clause that any payment more than X days late will be considered a non-payment. If she wants, she can add "unless arranged by prior agreement", but I wouldn't. And make sure the consequences are clearly set out

In my experience, these people are like this with a lot of services. It's just selfishness and a lack of basic decency, pure and simple. If you can't pay that month, don't bring the kids that month.

its the same with my rental house....no rent for 6 months and no way of getting it back.

And agree with the PP suggestion that she charges interest on late payment.

Welcome to generation entitled.

My friend used to be a CM but she got sick and tired of chasing money. I can't believe people think it's acceptable to do.

Very common unfortunately.

I remember doing a bit for a friend for a few months when she went back to work and I was still a sahm. She would often forget at the end of the week to pay me and whereas she was sorry, there was no sense of urgency like there would be with other jobs. It was just a "bah, I did it again! Can we sort it next week?" type reaction.