People who look so polished ... How???

[birthdaymayhem]

Posting for traffic and maybe in the hopes of finding a wizard who can tell me how to achieve this.

So in my immediate circle of friends I know 2 couples who always look so polished and put together they could've jumped out of a Next catalogue!
For me it's like dark magic. They always have clean, ironed and up to date clothes.
Especially the ladies, hair always blow dried or very neat, ridiculously smooth skin even up close, and clothes which must've come out of the brand new next collection (they all dress in a very similar way).
None of them are "would look good in a bin bag and a pair of crocs" type of beautiful but they are just so well put together they always look amazing!

But how can you look so good, fresh and put together all the time with 2 or 3 small DCs in tow, a house and job and all the stuff that comes along with that?

My put together is clothes that passed the sniff test and makeup hastily slapped on whilst DCs are having breakfast before we are out of the door.

BossAssBitch (great name) I think you're right about taking care both of yourself and your clothes. This spring, I've had several items mended, so I can reuse them and they are in good condition.

Someone once said to me, “Lelly, you always look like you’ve just had a bloody great shag

That’s a good look.

Someone once said to me, “Lelly, you always look like you’ve just had a bloody great shag

Possibly the best thing I've ever read on MN.

@JustCallMeSliths yes it's like a spray foundation

My sister always looks polished. She’s relatively tall, fabulous figure, thick healthy hair and tanned skin. I could do exactly as she does but at 5 2”, overweight, pasty spotty skin and thin limp hair I will never achieve that level of polish it’s just not possible. I laugh when people say all you need is a bit of tinted moisturizer and lipgloss - I’m guessing these people are like my sister and are simply genetically blessed. Of course everyone looks better when they put in the effort but only a few will achieve polished perfection and that requires genetic luck

A friend who dresses lovely said I wear the nicest clothes of all our friends. But when I said to DP that I used to try and look elegant, he laughed - with some justification. Some people never manage to pull this off. I am one.

Planetian, with all due respect, from the list of reasons you have given that you are not as polished as your sister, the only one that is not in your control is being 5’2”, and it is perfectly possible to look smashing at 5’2”. All the rest can be changed/worked with if you really want to (and believe you deserve it).

I'm curious about this "deserving it" comment that's been made a few times on this thread. There are numerous other ways to treat yourself well because you deserve it. Why does it have to be make up/clothes/beauty? I don't want to spend my time and money on these things. I'd rather stick the money away and then go off on trip somewhere. That's what makes me feel good. I don't really like this point of view because it then implies someone who doesn't spend time and money on "looking good" has low self esteem or something. I don't have low self esteem, I just have different priorities and different interests. Sitting in the hairdressers bores me silly. A spa day would be my idea of hell. If people like those things, then that's absolutely fine but it doesn't mean I love myself any less because I don't.

Absolutely right Asta19, refusing to go to a spa day or spend a lot of money on clothes is by no means necessarily a sign of poor self-esteem. If you’re content with the way you look without doing any of that stuff then carry on!

But a great many of the PPs here who are looking for ways to improve their appearance are not happy with how they look and they feel powerless to change it. One of the stumbling blocks to changing it is believing they don’t deserve it - often, someone else has convinced them that the relatively little amounts of time and money involved in changing the situation are better spent elsewhere (usually on them). I don’t think it can be said they are suffering from an over-developed self-esteem.

1. Be slim.
2. Wear neat, unfussy clothing - and make sure it’s well ironed.
3. Have perfect skin so you can wear minimal make up.
4. Don’t have big boobs, or any body part that deviates from a slim model type.
5. Have a good swingy hair cut, preferably straight or in tonged waves.
6. Short but not bitten and well manicured nails.

I never look polished. I’m too fat, I have rosacea (even if my skin actually feels gorgeous) and my hair is wild and curly. I normally have short well manicured nails though.

People say I look polished and smart, even when not trying. I use good skincare products, moisturise my hands all the time and I make sure my clothes fit. I see a lot of people wearing cothes that may have fit 10 years ago but do not now. You'll never look like you give a shit if your cothes are too tight

Millions - probably billions - of people around the world do not have ironed straight shoulder length hair!

According to MN wisdom not one of those people could ever possibly be called ‘polished’ in appearance.

Not. One.

Completely agree with @mommybunny, if you are content with your appearance either with or without grooming then that's great.

But a lot of people are unhappy about their appearance and seem to think they're stuck with it. If I stopped the teeth whitening, pedicures and good hair cuts and just lived in mum jeans and a fleece then I wouldn't look polished obviously. Even if you're not genetically lucky there's 101 little tricks that will make you look so much better, but you have to make the effort.

I usually go out looking okay by the time I get back I look like I’ve been harassed by gulls and run home. Probably partly due to having a toddler lol

LennyBelardo
BossAssBitch can I just ask about your lashes? Do you always have them done and do they make your natural lashes fall out?

Always. Although sometimes I wear stick ons (Benefit do amazing lashes) when I want to give my lashes a rest. If you go somewhere decent, your own lashes shouldn't be compromised too much. There is no getting away from it though, having glue applied to your lashline doesn't do your lashes any good. However, I am addicted to how awake and fresh they make me look so it's a price I'm willing to pay

I’m just wondering if some of the people who are despairing at not looking good are not correlating that the good skincare regimen can then lead to only needing to apply basic makeup to look good.

What an amazing thread! I’m a very very long time lurker, but reading this has kicked my butt into making small changes as many of you have pointed out.

So thank you to everyone who had contributed - great top tips, best post ever X

I appreciate what you’re saying mommybunny but perhaps I phrased it wrong. My weight of course I can control, but my figure still isn’t wonderful even when I’m at my thinnest. My skin will always be paler than pale (not English rose type pale, more pallid grey sadly - fake tan on skin this pale always looks frightfully orange so that’s a no go too!) and my hair is naturally really thin, even more so since I had children. I can try to make it look somewhat volumised but even the babyliss can’t work magic on my limp locks! So I can look “better” with some effort, but I will never look fabulously polished. It’s not that I don’t think I “deserve” it, it’s just a statement of fact really!

I think polished as an adjective is really subjective, it seems that it goes from Love Island to Kate Middleton in terms of personal style.

I think wearing clothes that you feel great in, confidence, and good posture work whatever your goals in style are. The rest is all personal and a matter of taste.

I admire a lot of women's looks, some dress in really cool, individual ways, some in really classic, timeless, but they all exude confidence and have good posture.

If money was no object I would 100% get lash extensions on a monthly basis. The two times I have had them (my hen & wedding day) I felt amazing & the closest to polished I have ever been

happy I used to get lash extensions done all the time for years. Then I taught myself how to do it with individuals - it’s not that hard once you have got the hang of it, I’m happy to tell you which products I use and my technique if you want more info :)

I’m just wondering if some of the people who are despairing at not looking good are not correlating that the good skincare regimen can then lead to only needing to apply basic makeup to look good

It’s just truly amazing how half the world can get by with the bare minimum in terms of skincare and still not have to wear make up to look good isn’t it.

With the hair, if you dye it then get your hairdresser recommend the right colour for you. I love blonde but it is too expensive & difficult to maintain. I switched to dark brown with a few other shades & knocks years off my face! Keep a nail file in your bag..my nails split & break dispite wearing rubber gloves doing chores & hand cream. You can spruce up you nails in seconds with a file. Keep make up minimal, touch of mascara & tinted lip balm xx