To complain about this swimming teacher?

[Stillpinching]

DS is 9 and still at stage 3 which I know isn't great. I'm a single parent and can't swim, which obviously limits the amount of practice he can get in between lessons. I have repeatedly asked ex to take the DC swimming when he has them but he is a lazy areshole who prefers to let them sit on screens the whole time he has them as it's easier and cheaper.

DS had lessons booked in ex's contact time for a while, though I paid for it, as the pool is minutes from his house and he doesn't work, making it easier for him to take him after school, but he repeatedly 'forgot' so I take him again now.

This week they were doing the thing where they push off from the side then do a roll. Ds's attempts weren't great TBF but she was so harsh on him. He wasn't messing around but she told him he wasn't trying (I'm a sec school English teacher and have yet to master the art of knowing beyond doubt whether or not students are trying when not misbehaving) and told him he must practise more, helpfully suggesting he come after school and/or weekends. DS wasn't motivated by her tirade and I felt like an even shitter parent than I normally do. Only four kids were there and the other kids all did the manoeuvre. It was so awkward - parents were giving me sympathetic looks etc.

Aibu to complain? A 9 year old has no control over how often he is taken to practice and, given my circumstances I have limited control also. I don't pay good money for sale and I to be made to feel like shit...

I'm sorry that your son was treated badly - it's not his fault (or yours!) that he was struggling with something. Maybe it will just take him a bit longer to click with it.

My son is younger than yours (5) and we were having issues with the council lessons too - too much waiting around and lack of actual help to correct poor technique. I'm also a teacher and although I do my best to take him when I can it's limited and he just wants to play!

Obviously I don't know your financial situation but could you stretch to one to one lessons, even just for a term? I only ask because after a particularly be council lesson last week, I took my son to a trial one to one lesson with a different pool and it was great. So much guidance with technique and he did more swimming in that half an hour than he's done in months with the council. It's £20 per lesson which sounds extortionate but the level of tuition is far superior. Would ex play half? Or grandparents?

You don't need a pool to practice the roll. Just let him lay on floor in streamline and practice turning over! He may have poor core which would also explain why the co ordination is harder for him to grasp and master.

At the pool my younger two have lessons in there’s sort of bench out of the water that I’ve seen the teachers lie the children on and move their bodies for them till they get it. Could you ask his teacher to actually show him what she needs to be done?

It’s interesting how the lessons differ between countries. My DC have all had lessons in Australia, in various cities and in various pools and I’ve never seen an armband. The infants use noodles.

Is the teacher usually overly strict or shouty?

My dd is 9 and quite avcompetent swimmer although we stopped lessons a while ago. However, our local pool has family splash sessions at weekends. They are in the teaching pool so warm and shallow, they have floats, balls, things to dive for etc. It's great for water confidence which is half the battle in swimming. You would be able to go without him and just have a relax or play silly games, catch etc in a relaxed way which would be of benefit to you both. See what's available to you in your area. My dd loves these sessions even though she is capable of swimming lengths in the big pool.

I think challenging someone on their approach - if done correctly - is fine.

My ds is autistic and generally throughout his school career he's had fantastic supportive and understanding teachers.
He's had some who think if they shout at him a little louder he'll suddenly understand their non literal language, nuances and his executive function skills will develop.
I know as a parent it'll make him more anxious and make him less able to understand and comply.
So I teach ds you'll come across people like this in life whilst also speaking to teacher and empathising with how frustrating it is suggesting ways he may respond to better.

Nolonger yes to being physically shown. My ds is club level now and their coach still uses this technique at times to refine and improve their skills. It's so hard to teach a physical manoeuvre without physically demonstrating it!

In Scotland, to move from swim skills level 1 onto swim skills level 2 they need to be able to swim 10 meters front and back crawl unaided. And there's a bunch of different floats they need to demonstrate and some other stuff. So at the end of our level 1, they should be swimming completely unaided. Level 2 is then more intensive and building technique and strength. By level 3, they are competent and doing diving for bricks etc. Seems her different from the English programme.

www.swimming.org/learntoswim/asa-learn-to-swim-awards-1-7/

This is helpful hopefully as explains each stage

I agree with the poster who says that even those using the framework interpret it widely In order to get the level 3 here, you have to do 50m breaststroke, front crawl and backstroke, get a brick from the deep end and do 10 m butterfly (amongst other things). My second child has his 5 m badge with the same swim school and isn’t yet into the pre-level 1 class

It's such a shame that every swim school doesn't adhere to the national plan of stages. That's the whole point of the national plan; so that any swim school, anywhere in the country a stage 3 is a stage 3. Then swapping would be easy. But, alas, they don't; some are stricter than others, some make up their own stages. I've worked for 4 swim schools, and every one stage 3 is something different (even those who adhere to the national plan!

I disagree as a swimming teacher and a parent who has a dd in our school she’s a far more compent swimmer now that if she had been using th ASA framework, it’s guideline it’s not conplusory programme and it says a lot many places alter and adapt their own. Personally I believe our staging programme is far better than the national one.

It's her job to teach swimming. Children who make progress more slowly bring in more income. It's ridiculous to get cross.

There's no way she can tell if he's trying and only people who enjoy the power of their position say things like that.

She sounds horrible and her attitude will make it harder for him to learn.

If there's an option to move to a different teacher/pool I'd take it. He needs a teacher who enjoys the challenge of connecting with children as individuals and working through the difficult bits while building upon their confidence.