Moaning about being ‘poor’ when rich

[freetone]

AIBU to think if you are childless, go on 3 holidays abroad per year and live in a 4 bed detached house on a private road then you don’t have the right to moan about being ‘poor’? My DF and his wife have been like this recently. He earns over £150k a year. It shows how far away from reality they are imo. Really gets on my nerves when there are millions of people genuinely struggling. Anyone else experienced people like my Father?

Whilst I agree that a 100k salary is a great salary, I also get that a 5.5k household income does not go far in London (also that 5.5k is not taking into account pension or student loan repayment) if you are renting or got on the ladder later & have children. Someone living near me these days would pay 2k plus a month for a flat & easily 1.5k plus childcare for 1 child.

However your DF sounds like a pain & is wrong.

Whilst I agree that a 100k salary is a great salary, I also get that a 5.5k household income does not go far in London (also that 5.5k is not taking into account pension or student loan repayment) if you are renting or got on the ladder later & have children. Someone living near me these days would pay 2k plus a month for a flat & easily 1.5k plus childcare for 1 child.

So their monthly income would be £5.5k and they’d have £2k left after paying their rent and childcare bill. How on earth is having £2k leftover after you’ve paid housing costs and childcare not rich?

Also, there are plenty of areas within London where rent on a 2 bed flat is considerably less than £2k a month. Someone whose salary permits them to live in an area where rents are so high is, you guessed it, rich!

I remember being in a meeting with my boss and others. He was bemoaning the fact that his Private Medical Insurance had gone up. The other people in the meeting were on minimum wage.

I really wanted to say something, I regret that I didn't.

He's now head of that (Charitable) organisation. What an idiot.

See I disagree that they would be classed as rich & it would be more like 1.5k after pension provisions & that’s only if they stick to 1 child. So out of the 1.5k has to come food, bills, travel etc. Not poverty by any means but not rolling in it either.

There is a massive problem with housing. There are huge swathes of zone 2/3/4 London where it now costs 1m plus for a bog standard terrace. It’s not sustainable imo.

Wow! £2k for food and living expenses alone is well off.
Also hate when people talk about large pension contributions. That is a choice and means you will have a comfortable retirement. Many people do not have that choice.

See I disagree that they would be classed as rich & it would be more like 1.5k after pension provisions & that’s only if they stick to 1 child. So out of the 1.5k has to come food, bills, travel etc. Not poverty by any means but not rolling in it either.

So this imaginary family can also afford to spend £500 a month on their pension? Again, being able to make a choice like that is a pretty good indication that someone is rich. A family who have an income of £5.5k a month are rich, that they choose to spend a lot on rent, childcare and pension contributions doesn’t change that. If having “only” £1.5k a month for food, bills, travel, etc is bothering them then they’re at liberty to cut back on their other expenses. The vast majority of families have no such choice.

I had a colleague who dabbled in stocks and shares and used to say things like "Well, everyone's got a spare £5000 in their bank account haven't they?"
Erm, no.

I wouldn't class them as rich either.

To me rich means at least a couple of massive homes, several cars, probably some sort of largish yacht etc.

Someone earning £100k a year is nowhere near that sort of level. They're doing nicely, thank you, and yes, will no doubt live better than the average person, with a bigger house and not having to think about it too hard when it comes to buying stuff, but rich? No.

Yeah, the woe-is-me poor posse who are all "We are so poor, our nanny is poor, our cleaning lady is poor, our housekeeper is poor, our chauffeur is poor, our gardener is poor, the personal trainer is poor, the Yoga teacher is poor...

A family who have an income of £5.5k a month are rich, that they choose to spend a lot on rent, childcare and pension contributions doesn’t change that

Yes they should definitely choose to move away from the high-paying job market or reduce their hours or quit work to reduce childcare costs & they shouldn’t choose to pay into a company pension scheme & instead rely on the state giving them a pension & homing them in their later years as they won’t have enough to pay their rent. Let’s put more burden or the shrinking tax paying population. Why hasn’t anyone else thought of this?

Just out of interest, where does the “they’re not rich because their rent/mortgage/pension costs are high” argument end?

Can someone who earns £500k a year say they’re “not rich” because they choose to rent a flat in Mayfair for £10k a month and save £5k in their pension so they don’t really have much left for food, bills and travel?

Yes they should definitely choose to move away from the high-paying job market

Why would anyone need to leave their high paying job in order to rent a two bed flat for less than £2k a month. There’s plenty of rented accommodation for far less than that in London, it just may be in a less desirable area. Being able to choose to live in a nice area is one of the privileges of being rich.

The pension argument is somewhat irrelevant. If they can choose to save £500 a month for retirement they’re rich. Whether they should or shouldn’t do that is a separate question.

Oh god, I totally
Agree, I have a friend who constantly moans about having no money, comes to my house, let's me buy takeaways. Buys the cheapest of the cheap of everything and wonders why clothes etc don't last.
Turned out she had savings of £150,000
I asked her about it and she said "well I am skint after I put £1500 a month into my saving"

Or maybe, just maybe, people on £100k should pull their heads out of their arses and realise that they are absolutely not poor and if they run out of cash, it’s due to poor financial planning.

Instead we get ridiculous “whatabouttery”, as if someone on £100k+ struggles like someone on the minimum wage.

The problem with society is that the gap is far too big between rich and poor. Many jobs just don’t pay the bills. That’s not the fault of the employees as not everyone can get a high paid job!

Can someone who earns £500k a year say they’re “not rich” because they choose to rent a flat in Mayfair for £10k a month and save £5k in their pension so they don’t really have much left for food, bills and travel?

Saving / investing 5k a month would make them rich over time.

If they spent all their income on rent, school fees, golf club membership and anything that can't be sold later or doesn't produce an income, then they are not rich. That is their own fault, and they'd be stupid and insensitive to moan about their lot in front of people on low incomes.

But rich means having a lot of money, and money spent us money you no longer have.

PigsDOfly

If that’s your definition of rich then could I ask what you’d define as poor?

As soon as that money hits their bank account, they’re rich. End of. And it will hit their bank account every single month assuming they’re in secure employment.

A very different position to someone working all hours on a minimum wage job having to scrape by.

The richest people are often the ones who feel the poorest and are the least generous- or so it is in my family.

I know a couple who are both Drs. He is a top surgeon (Mr) and she is a Dr, not sure of actual earnings but I reckon it will be over £300k and they have the cheek to complain about being poor!!!!

The flip side also gets on my nerves. My SIL who has never worked brags about being able to get cheap holidays out of school time to me. We can’t because DH is a teacher. People just forget each others situations. Also sometimes people who appear rich are supporting others. Eg we pay out a load each moth for my daughters rent. If I earned less we wouldn’t have to as my DD would get more in student loan.

So what’s is the maximum figure you are allowed to earn before you are allowed to moan about not being able to afford to buy a house?

Years ago when we lived hand to mouth I remember another mother saying she was feeding her children on bread and jam because they had no money. They had no money because they had had a top of the range kitchen refit. I had to make choices daily about whether what I could buy to eat. I had two t shirts and two skirts which I alternated all summer, and a pair of sandals bought by MiL.
We are comfortably off now, and yes I am grateful.

decormad Yes but your DD would have a bigger debt than your daughter does.

fancy You can moan about not being able to afford to buy a house, just don't claim you are poor around people who actually are.

So what’s is the maximum figure you are allowed to earn before you are allowed to moan about not being able to afford to buy a house?

I thought you were saying £100k wouldn’t make someone rich because their rent might be £2k a month for a 2 bed flat.

On the positive side, on £100k a year you could definitely buy a 2 bed flat in many areas of London.