Moaning about being ‘poor’ when rich

[freetone]

AIBU to think if you are childless, go on 3 holidays abroad per year and live in a 4 bed detached house on a private road then you don’t have the right to moan about being ‘poor’? My DF and his wife have been like this recently. He earns over £150k a year. It shows how far away from reality they are imo. Really gets on my nerves when there are millions of people genuinely struggling. Anyone else experienced people like my Father?

Yes. There's a difference between poor and skint because you've spent all your money.

@denim

When they say they are "skint" they mean they "have spent it all"

My sister was once telling me about her friends, who had "financial difficulties".

This amounted to them moving from a huge, four-bedroomed house, to a much smaller, three-bedroomed house, in a road which they didn't consider was posh enough.

At the time I was getting divorced and trying to support myself and my DC in a tiny, rented two-bedroomed flat.

I could tell that my sister knew immediately she'd said something wrong.

KarenTheCashRegister

Also so sick of hearing about £100k not being much in London. The average household income isn’t even £50k!”

Of course it’s relative. To a family of 4 getting by on £14,000 in Bolton, £50k seems like an unimaginable fortune. Doesn’t feel that way to a London family struggling to cover all of the bills on it.

Of course no-one on £100k could be considered poor at the wildest stretch but to describe them as “rich” as in the question is equally inaccurate. It depends entirely on specific circumstances, location, size of family (and their specific needs), cost of living etc.

Ergo, relative!

I once had to leave an online group because someone mentioned that another person had moaned to them that times were so tough they would have to sell their holiday home abroad, when the first person was living much more hand to mouth. It turned into a bit of a pile on and I couldn't let it slide so stuck up for the OP. They just didn't get how insensitive it was AT ALL. Someone even asked if it was because I was jealous and thought I deserved it more! Fucking idiots. I was incensed at the time.

@800msprint
Did you?

Even if a high earner is "skint" they can usually access money via credit cards etc.

Many years ago there was a Lord who resigned a ministerial post because he could not live on £36k per year (for context, I earnt £7k a year in my job then).

Some people have no sense of perspective.

£100 k goes nowhere in the South.

A relative of mine was so broke that she was having to decide whether to get rid of her cleaner or her personal trainer

there is a level of complete ignorance with some people. I genuinely think some people do not get what it means to live on the breadline.

However, i do understand why people may moan as between my DH and myself we earn well but I get frustrated that despite that i'm not in such a comfortable position as my mum and dad were at the same age, despite us being in better jobs. Increase in house prices and cost of living means we don't have much spare cash so in in effect we've had to be more successful just to reach the same standard of living as our parents.

Social media doesn't help as it makes us aware of what everybody else plus there is more to buy (phones, big tv's and all the rest of the stuff which is now considered essential).

however, this is no excuse for being ignorant twats.

£100 k goes nowhere in the South.

That is absolute bullshit.

My friend has little having had far more in the past. She dumped her last guy, who had a fair amount of property and money. She is really content. It would be a lot tougher if her exes didn’t help her. But she has the attitude of gratitude as ladybirds illustrated. Some people are never happy with what they have got even when it is a great deal.

I agree! Whilst you can feel not particularly well off because you have high outgoings, you are not poor (even in London) on £50k plus! I often have no money at the end of the month but that's because we spend too much on food, our dog is spoilt, the kids don't have student loans and we increased our mortgage to extend. Oh and we know too many people with 2x professional salaries (I work only pt) and with family money which can distort your perspective

Hoppinggreen
That’s brilliant

Completely agree that no one on £100k is poor - by any stretch of the imagination.

But I can also understand the London issue and how people feel. With rents being so high - there can be families on £100k salaries in tiny rented accommodation, spending astronomical sums on rent with no hopes of ever getting on the property ladder.

These people might be shopping at Aldi and Lidl, on seriously small budgets, and struggling to make ends meet. Often they can't take holidays. Because the cost of living is so much higher.

If they earned half as much almost anywhere else in the country they'd be feeling comparatively rich.

There's also a complete breakdown where older people own homes, and so seem wealthier on a smaller wage but for younger people in London, what seem like high wages in numbers terms actually go nowhere/

Anyway, it's still not poor, that's for sure, but I do get it.

We have a household income of around £35k, two older DCs who cost us a lot with high level music and swimming. We have a mortgage, one car (which is over 20 years old) and our idea of a holiday is a few days camping in a tent in Cornwall. I'm so grateful for all we have and wouldn't dream of pleading poverty. We are so rich compared to most of the world population.

£100 k goes nowhere in the South

Rather depends on what you spend your money on. I live in the South, most people are not earning as much as £100k, yet somehow they seem to manage.

In this world, there are people who are poor and people who make themselves poor by overspending!

It can sometimes be guilt-driven.

I have a very property rich friend who always says how lucky we are to go on holiday and wishes she had money to burn like us.

Sell your fucking mansion then and live in a flat like us and you could probably buy Majorca.

Now have to lie down from venting

I agree that that is a lot of money. Although I think you have to pay something like 40% tax on it. Still a lot of money though!

Who actually goes about their daily life remembering to feel grateful? I've had my ups and downs and ups again. My rich was someone else's scraping by and my poor was living the dream compared to some.

When i was poor i struggled to buy enough food for us (5) and had to chose between bills. Some would say they'd be grateful to be able to pay any bills at all. And that i should have been. Fair enough, but i can't say i felt very grateful at that point in my life.

We have a Family income of around £60k. We feel fairly rich as we live in a big house and have a cleaner etc. But we don’t go on big holidays or spend loads on nights out. My parents were genuinely skint when we were growing up: my poor mum wore cheap leggings which she always had to sew up as they kept bursting (she made sure we didn’t do without). I’m eternally grateful to them for putting us first, and grateful that we don’t need to worry about money.