He stabbed me with a feather!!!

[HelloDearHusband]

I was just about falling asleep last night and my (d?)h decided to stab me in the side with a feather he'd pulled from the feather duvet!! He says it's been stabbing him for days. (And for some reason that must be my fault right?)

WIBU to find and equally sharp spikey thing and stab him back when he falls asleep tonight???

(Ps...light-hearted as he found MN and has been asking if I post about him, and after said stabbing by feather he asked if I was going to post about it on MN??? So here it is....and the answer to his question is no I haven't posted about him before this is the first time.... )

Ltb

smother him with that exact duvet

Funny that, I get blamed for the pillow feathers stabbing my DP 🤔 it’s clearly my fault!

Turn it into a game. Blindfold him, and stab him with a variety of things, making him guess what they are. The possibilities are endless: cotton bud, tweezers, safety pin, bristles of styling brush. Tell him you're doing the science experiment of testing which parts of his body can detect if it's one stabby thing or two.

LTB

Do a Dutch oven

I threatened to leave my very own bastard the other night when he came to bed and decided to tickle my feet when I was already asleep

Final Written Warning on this occasion I think.

You still have a feathered duvet?

😂

Wtf?! How rude of him!

I'd poke the feather (pointy end first) up his nose 😂

Was it a feather from your fluffy angel wings maybe? A feather from angel wings prodding the unrighteous.

You still have a feathered duvet?

They are far superior to a plastic one.

You still have a feathered duvet?

They are far superior to a plastic one.

I have a wool one! No feathers, no plastic. Just cuddley and warm.

Or you could pinch his ear lobe or the fleshy part under his arm this is what I do when dh is annoying me.

You still have a feathered duvet?

Yep, why would I have got rid of it? To add to the already overflowing landfill problem? There’s nothing up with it and I will keep using it until it falls to pieces.

Don't use the pointy end. When he is falling asleep next time, use the feathery end and just very slightly tickle under his nose. Depending on how much you tickle, he will twitch or sneeze (or both if you're very skilled ) and wake himself up. Repeat three times.

The fun bit for you (as well as enjoying his discomfort) is not being seen or caught with the feather). You can do this each night until he cottons on.

Not that we do this kind of thing in the CisCityHome of course Once DH accidentally scratched me with a toenail in bed The next morning I pointed out his grey eyebrow hair and offered to pluck it with tweezers. I told him it doesn't hurt, in fact he wouldn't even feel it.

He keeps his toenails to himself now.

LTB.

Why not wait until he has fallen asleep, then position a hairbrush where he will roll over on it in his sleep?

@ptumbi you can get wool duvets??

heads to google

I have a wool one!

Will no one think of the poor sheep?

Where do women find these awful men?! Why didn't their mothers raise them properly?!

My mum has a silk duvet. It's amazing.
Drop an ice cube on his foot.
Evil

earthporm.com/shrek-sheep-escaped-shearing-6-years/
what sheep like this?
I have to have plastic as have allergies. wool does sound cosy

smother him with that exact duvet

I love this

Regarding the feathered duvet debate, I'm vegan and still have feathered pillows/duvets, plus assorted old leather boots. I will use them until they are used up!