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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you how you met your partner?

133 replies

Overandoverupanddown · 02/05/2019 15:41

NC
My DP and I are coming to the end of the road. One of those unfortunate 'we both have a different vision for the future' kind of endings where you're both sad to break up, but you both know it's right (along the lines of one is moving abroad, one definitely is not moving abroad, or one wants kids, one doesn't).
I'm been coming to terms with it for a while now.
I had envisioned marriage and kids with DP so am coming to terms with my life being different to that, and slightly aghast at the idea of having to start again from scratch with someone new (but also excited at the idea of a relationship where there isn't this big 'issue' between us?)

The idea of going on a date or getting a dating app or essentially putting myself out there is terrifying to me- I thought I was done with all that!

So AIBU to ask you to cheer me up by giving me hope with telling me the random place or way you met your DP?

Did you meet at work? At a running club? On a train? In Tesco?

OP posts:
TheWernethWife · 02/05/2019 18:11

In a pub in Manchester City Centre, still together, 34 years this month.

nrpmum · 02/05/2019 18:12

School not helpful

BogglesGoggles · 02/05/2019 18:12

In a coffee shop. Have met every single man I’ve ever dated/flinged with eother in some random public place or through volunteering. He was my first committed relationship and we married very quickly. This was all in London mind you. That town is like some sort of sex pond.

Racheyg · 02/05/2019 18:14

@Hermie12 wishing you well for tomorrow xx

Met dh on a Internet forum talking about tattoos 10 years ago. 2 kids and a marriage later...

Original poster
Overandoverupanddown · 02/05/2019 18:15

Hahahaha @Zippy that made me smile

OP posts:
Original poster
Overandoverupanddown · 02/05/2019 18:17

@eastmidsgps that sounds like it should be in a film!! That sounds amazing, minus any broken bones!

OP posts:
dreamyflower · 02/05/2019 18:19

Met my dh online. Wasn't a dating site but a site to get to know people before you started uni. We weren't even doing the same course but just started talking and switched numbers. I'd never been to London so went to visit him there and he took me on a tour.11 years later and 2 children and we're still happy.

Yummymummycupcake · 02/05/2019 18:20

On a dating site. Plenty of Fish.

funnylittlefloozie · 02/05/2019 18:23

Met my now exDH in a bar at uni. There had been a hog roast in the garden that evening, and his immortal chat-up line was "do you know the weight of an average hog?" (Rolleyes).

The current Mr Floozie and I were set up on a date by a mutual friend. He and I worked at the same place for 3 years, but never met, although i DID know his ex-wife. First date went so well, that we had another, and another.... only 10 months in, but its all going bloody brilliantly!

storynanny · 02/05/2019 18:23

14 years ago, aged 48/51at jive classes.

PorpentinaScamander · 02/05/2019 18:24

Online. On a geeky based dating site Smile

Yummymummycupcake · 02/05/2019 18:25

I'd been on it for about 2 years, had some dates with nice people, but I didn't really feel a spark with any of them. There were loads of idiots and time wasters on there too. I decided I wasn't getting anywhere and was about to delete my profile when he messaged and I gave him a chance.
Almost 3 years later we're married with a 20 month old DC and he took on my other 3 DC. I'm so glad I persevered with online dating.

jinglet · 02/05/2019 18:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cricketballs3 · 02/05/2019 18:29

in a pub - he was an acquaintance of my ex BF and there was a huge queue to get served, asked him to also get mine and my friends drink he asked what it was worth I was a bit tipsy so I snogged him

about to have our 25th anniversary

formerbabe · 02/05/2019 18:30

We met in a bar on a night out which seems to be a rare way to meet someone nowadays

FedUpParent · 02/05/2019 18:38

My best friend's little brother, we'd been best friends for 5 years before i even looked twice at him Blush

DonttouchthatLarry · 02/05/2019 18:41

I was 5 months out of a 12 year relationship (met him at uni) and absolutely not looking for a man at all! Was out with horsey friends and one said there was a man who kept his horse at her yard who would be perfect for me. I asked why she wasn't interested and she said he wasn't her type but he was mine.

Obviously she knew me better than I thought - we met, after a couple of dates I practically moved in with him and we've been together 19 years and married 5.

Don't be scared of the future OP - ex and I were not really suited to each other and had our ups and downs but my husband is my perfect match and was worth waiting for Grin.

EastMidsGPs · 02/05/2019 18:43

@Overandoverupanddown

We should never have met, both mature students but on different university sites. Both out of long term relationships, had made life changes and neither looking for a partner.
I couldn't stand him at first sight but as he's pestered to make up for my injury I agreed to have a coffee with him. He took me out into Derbyshire and we just hit it off. Even though he was definitely not my type. He just seemed so comfortable with who he was. The rest they say is history.

Shootingstar1115 · 02/05/2019 18:54

Dating sites always seemed scary to me. I was worried about what kind of weirdos you could meet on there but a few years ago I joined one and it was the best decision I ever made.

I met my Wonderful OH on there, we’ve been together for 6-7 years and have two DC.

It sounds cheesy but I do believe it was fate. We had both become single at the same time, both wasn’t keen on dating websites but were encouraged by colleagues/friends. I came across his profile within a few days of being on there. I messaged him, he replied and cut a long story short, here we are! we had never heard of each other, only lived 10 minutes apart and again bizarrely our much younger siblings were friends. We were complete strangers though!

Blackandpurple · 02/05/2019 18:56

I had an affair with my now DH. 25 yrs ago. Still going strong when people said it would never work out when we went straight.

musicposy · 02/05/2019 18:57

Church, not an old lady type of church but a modern sort with masses of young people.
We were mid twenties and a little while beforehand I'd split from a 4 year relationship I'd been in all through uni. I thought I wouldn't find anyone again.

Just had our 25th wedding anniversary so something worked!

AEJS · 02/05/2019 18:57

We had been good friends for about 4 years while both engaged to other people.
Both our relationships broke up and we would console each other. Then the consoling turned into kissing.
Neither of us wanted another relationship at that point but clearly fancied the pants off each other! We agreed to have a short fling!

Fast forward 21 years and we are still flinging! Married 17 years and 2 DCs.

username1724 · 02/05/2019 18:57

Met at work, was actually very good friends with my now BIL for about a year before OH started in our workplace. We met on a night out about a week before he started, then just hung out at work, then after work, then things went from there! I'd been using dating apps and was actually getting out there and meeting guys. I highly recommend it (when you're ready) as it did my confidence wonders! Learning how to interact with strangers, dealing with the nerves, meeting different types of blokes to work out what was right for me, even when it didnt go well It was a huge learning curve and a lot of fun!

SteelRiver · 02/05/2019 19:07

I met my husband at work. Working for HM Armed Forces is a great place to meet men!

tor8181 · 02/05/2019 19:11

at a youth club at 17 and 18

been together 20 years,all happy never had aísse the whole time we have been together

not married as im not interested but do have 2 kids