To be fuming with dh

[midnightgirl]

I'm 2 weeks post gallbladder removal surgery. I am recovering but I'm still absolutely exhausted and light headed. I've just been informed I'm cooking dinner for 8 people tonight, and dh won't be home till later. Also I have learnt he has booked an overnight stay at Alton towers this weekend, I can barely walk around too much never mind go on rollercoasters. I obviously can't go but my dcs are disappointed so I feel guilty. He doesn't want to go on his own with 4 kids. I'm fuming with him for putting me in this position

If the kids are 12 and over then he doesnt need any help at alton towers!!!!!!! I could understand if they were toddlers and he had to go on rides with them. But it isnt the case here. Spend the day in bed. And as other posters have suggested.... dominoes tonight!

Look, OP, just SAY NO!

Jesus wept! Just tell him NO. And he can take the kids on his own.

Do takeaway and have him reschedule this weekend.

Stop being so spineless! Who’s coming after the school run? The relatives?

Just fall into bed and say no not doing it.
Also tell him to shape up.

Tell him to pick up a take away on his way home from the school run. Surely that's OK isn't it? Or is he wanting home cooked food?

he's in a mood now

Well he should have thought about things a bit more shouldn't he? What a twat. And if you have kids off school ill that's another good reason not to have people round. How old are the kids?

Another vote for him doing dinner (or buying takeaway) and you going to bed. Let him take the children to Alton Towers at the weekend and have the house to yourself. Bliss!

I had my gallbladder out last summer and was advised to take things easy for a month. At about 3 weeks I grabbed my "DGS who was around 18 months old, and was making a bid for freedom, and it was really uncomfortable for a couple days after. You really do need to take things easy.

My DH would happily take on the cooking.

When I had gallbladder surgery I still felt very rough two weeks after surgery. Take it easy OP, look after yourself and say NO. 🌻🌻🌻

Do not jeopardise your recovery.

If there are 2 adults, tell them you're unable to entertain - sorry and all that I suppose - and show them where things are then go to bed and rest. They can look after the kids and themselves until dh gets in. Leave them to it. I'd be fine if you did that to me.

It’s a month recovery from gall bladder removal surgery.
Even if you feel better you have to heal internally. My partner looked after me for two weeks after that I was up and pottering about. But I didn’t go back to work for a month and the dr said it would be stupid to go back sooner!
So look after yourself op. You do need to take it easy. It’s not worth the risk to your health!

Do NOT cook dinner.

Absent yourself. Go to a relative or friend's house for the night, or to a hotel. Tell your DH (and I would leave it til about 5pm if I were yuo) that you are not going to be there and that getting the dinner and the house ready is on him. Suggest that you're not coming back until he recognises your need for quiet and rest post surgery.

Don’t.
Stay in bed and tell everyone that you are too unwell to cook.

With Alton Towers, tell him he is a father, he should be able to look after his own dcs. And that he would be mean to disappoint them like this by telling them they were going whilst knowing it wouldn’t happen. Because surely it was clear yu can’t go AND he doesn’t really want to go either.

Don’t let him bully (or guilt trip) yiu into doing things you shouodnt do.

This a delightful opportunity to reinforce your superiority. What a marvellous treat I will have...........are you taking the afternoon off to do it or the whole day.

Of course I am excited to be going to Alton Towers. Obviously they have wheelchairs there don’t they.

I wouldn't be ordering a take away. I'd imagine he's more than capable. Just go to bed.
If the kids ask about at, tell them you can't stand for that length of time so dad's taking you.

So why have you told him to come home and cook. Why not just say no, I'm not up for visitors, I don't feel well enough you will have to cancel?

Can't be bothered??? Another fucking stupid comment

FFS you know what I mean, can't be bothered as in not up to it, don't want to deal with having to entertain other people but as usual on MN everything is taken so literally.

Have him pickk up pizza they kids will love you for it.
As for Alton towers, I'd stay home, the teens will be fine helping him watch everyone.

He's a fuckwit, OP. Even if recovery goes well, 2 weeks post-op for gall bladder surgery is no time at all.

Take-away or he can cook, and he can take the children to Alton Towers himself, unless you fancy a weekend chilling in a hotel.

UnBelieAble ((((Madd Hugs)))🌻🔆🌻

and it's the fact he's expecting me to still go to AT!

Just say no FFS! He can't physically force you to go can he?!

Hope you're feeling better soon

Aww OP, this is really shitty of him. He's trying to make you feel like this is you being some sort of killjoy or fun sponge or something, when in fact NOPE - why can't he see that you've been ill and should be resting up whenever you can, not cooking f**ing dinner for 8 folk. There's no way you can cope with Alton Towers. You have to be so careful after an op, as others are saying.

It's frustrating with folk like this, because they make you feel like you're being difficult even when you try and make helpful compromises to save the situation - like him cooking or ordering takeout. The whole situation gets twisted somehow so that whatever you do you're made to feel like the bad guy. He should be apologising for organising ANYTHING without realising how ill you are feeling. He should be taking care of you and it's shitty that he isn't thinking that way right now. Hope you feel better soon.

Tell him NO.

The dinner could be remedied with a takeaway mass order for everyone.

But going away with 4 kids and he doesn't want to go on his own despite not having asked if you feel up for it yet.

Selfish and rude.

Tell the kids it will have to be delayed.