Breastfeeding: Only Middle Class Now?

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Was debating this with my DP - he is of the belief that breastfeeding is a mainly a middle class thing. I'm not sure if I agree, wanted other opinions.

We live in a very MC/posh area of London and I'd say 90% of mums at my Baby classes BF. This is his evidence.

We both grew up in working class environments - him in a council estate in London where no-one breastfed and me in a Northern town where is was normal to BF.

So.... thoughts?

Looking back it is actually quite sad that when I fed my newborn a bottle I was very quick to add it was expressed milk. Surely no one should care but I felt the pressure non the less - and yes I am sure it was more about my insecurities and feelings of failure.

This is so true! I've even found myself doing this now!! Which is ridiculous - there is certainly perceived judgement on bottle feeding. Very sad ☹️

Sounds like you are confident and brilliantly supported - how splendid Hope you are enjoying your lovely baby and good luck with your breastfeeding!

@SignedUpJust4This Agree completely. A few months ago I read a thread about US mothers BF-ing, and I think there are far better facilities to pump at work (and a lot of pressure on them to do this) --- I can't imagine seeing a workplace in the U.K. set up for this 🤔

A friend of hours was very young when she had her baby and managed to breastfeed very successfully .I too breastfed both my children (the second for just over a year!).Would agree that it is a mostly middle class thing though.

I bucked the trend a bit as a young 20s low income (although I guess you'd say a higher income upbringing, it's only because we were young we had a low income and we don't now) BF both mine exclusively beyond 6 months, I know a variety of women from many backgrounds and would say most tried it, but I can only think of 2 or 3 who were still BF beyond even 4 months I haven't noticed much difference in class and length.

The only women I know who bf for over about a year were teachery/socialworkery types though

what are teachery/social-workery types? I'm in my fifth year of more-or-less continuous breastfeeding and you've named two jobs I wouldn't do for any money! I have a corporate job. Interestingly several of my female colleagues breastfed to natural term (another mum on my immediate team feeds her 2yo) and I know others where I've eventually discovered they breastfed beyond 1yr as well. You often don't know a woman breastfed beyond 1 unless you have cause to get talking about it somehow because 99.999% of feeds tend to be taking place at home with no one around at that stage. I know a few teachers; they bottle-fed wholly or primarily.

I live in London and it's fascinating to see how much of a microcosm your social world can be. Mums I know (MC, professional and almost all in work) breastfed wholly or partially without exception, although most probably used bottles post 6 months. All members of both NCT groups I was in EBF at birth, introducing expressed or formula bottles at a gradual rate. I know that this is not a good sampling of the national picture, but we don't have a good sampling of the national picture any more, do we? Nobody really knows for sure how things have changed since 2010.

Yeah I got a big shock when I worked in a pharmacy in a lower class area than I had grown up and all the mums were going straight to bottles and formula. I had only ever seen people at least giving it a go.

I was from a working class family, own house, 1 parent working, 1 car and 2 holidays in the UK every year but never abroad.
I breastfed both my DD for 2 and 3 years, but I'm an older working mummy, living in a MC area now, I'm not sure if that makes a difference

@Namestheyareachangin Thank you! ❤️ I know a lot of mums who aren't supported and it's so tough ☹️

Given that I've had colleagues working in cupboards (poorly ) converted into offices I can't even begin to imagine where they would provide space to pump.

Funnily enough I recently read in a Victorian novel a comment on the lack of BFing among the upper classes - re a Lady Arabella invariably using a wet-nurse. 'The Ladies Arabella never can. (feed their babies). The Ladies Arabella have bosoms for show, not for use.'

It's a very well-known fact that breastfeeding trends are very class-based among white UK women. Trends, so obviously there will be lots of individual contradictory examples - but on average middle class women are more likely to breastfeed and to do so for longer.

All members of both NCT groups I was in EBF at birth, introducing expressed or formula bottles at a gradual rate

Is this so they could go back to work do you think?

The Ladies Arabella have bosoms for show, not for use.'

This line 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

I'm a GP in a very deprived area. It is staggeringly rare for a baby still to be being breastfed at the six week check. I'd say well under 10%.

I nearly gave up. We were having terrible issues and I remember being up at night in tears trying all the helplines but they don't operate at that time. Even a doctor told me to 'just give up' when baby was only a day old and my milk hadn't even come in yet. Nobody even told me about the whole milk coming in thing - and I did take NCT classes. The only reason I managed to keep going was because my sister being considerably richer than I am had hired a lactation consultant for her own little boy 6 months prior so she was very knowledgable. There is more support if you have money.

As we're swapping anecdotes, I massively noticed this as a quite posh, not very rich woman who lives in a mostly working class area. At NCT and when I went further afield for paid for baby classes almost everyone breastfed and those who didn't would always apologetically explain why they couldn't (which always made me feel sad that they felt obliged to do that). When I went to things in my immediate local area I was the only one breastfeeding in a sea of bottles, though no one was at all weird about it or anything.

Maybe because middle class mothers have access to more money and therefore can afford breastfeeding consultants etc if it breast feeding is nt as easy as they hoped? Maybe times have changed but when ds1_was born (he ,s now12) I got very little support from the midwives in hospital ,so gave up.breastfeeding very quickly,if they want to improve rates they need to offer far more support .

I think age is definitely a factor. When I had my 1st dd I was 16 (nearly 17 years ago now!) and I don’t think a single person expected me to breastfeed.
I remember being in hospital when dd had chicken pox at a few weeks old and being asked what milk she was on and the disbelief from the doctors face that I was breastfeeding her. I had numerous people including midwifes tell me I wouldn’t do it, luckily I was determined to prove them wrong and fed her for 16 months. I think a lot of people expected me to be embarrassed about it somehow? But it did seem like everything was against me. Even having my other two dc in my early 20s was met with surprise but certainly not as much as when I had my first.

I agree as well as age, it’s more likely the circles you run in rather than class. I’m my group of friends the norm seems to be to breastfeed for the first 6 weeks (or less) then switch to bottles, I think everyone except for 2 who bottle fed from the start did this.
I also think it can dependant on how your mum fed you too, as it seems common to do what is familiar.

I think it’s a class thing too and MC women are more likely to do it.

I was surprised to see that someone thinks women who are not white are more likely to BF. From my own experience and observations (so completely, subjective, anecdotal and in no way backed up by empirical evidence) I would have thought just the opposite. In my social circle (a fairly diverse London borough) I cannot think of any BAME BF-ers.

It seems such a shame that although the evidence is there that BF is the best way to feed a baby so few women actually do it. I know it can be difficult to do at first (IME it was the hardest thing I ever persisted with) but when you and the baby finally crack it, it makes life so much easier.

This is interesting as I got my arse handed to me when I first joined MN and said BF was a class issue, seems opinions have changed.
Like tanning and being thin, BF historically was a marker of poverty (only upper classes had wet nurses), but this trend has been reversed.

Quite possible a generation thing as well-you are comparing not only class, but when he was a baby and now as well. My mum said very few people she knew breastfed in the 70s but literature and midwives really promote it now.

In my social circle mainly MC 'teachery/social workers types' as so eloquently described upthread, and city professionals BF is the default, if someone isn't BF is usually because there was an issue rather than as a first choice. SIL and her friends are more the TOWIE type so comfortable financially, most DPs/DHs are well paid tradesman, but they all have a perfect prep, a sleepyhead, a bugaboo (tattooed eyebrows) and only one of her wider circle BFs and they all think she's a bit clingy and fussy with her baby (she's really not especially in MN terms). They all also have baby stay overnight very early, from 6 weeks ish , I know SIL thinks it's odd DS had never stayed with someone else and is five months.

Of course it's a class thing. In my world, formula feeding (and use of dummies) is so totally alien, nobody even mentions it.

Made it infinitely harder for me, because I hated BF and my continued obsession with doing it contributed to my PND. I just couldn't imagine formula feeding any more than I could imagine naming my kid Kourtnee-Storme or whatever.

My trigger word is 'support'. Christ, I had support coming out of my ears. I just absolutely hated it and didn't want to do it.

Support isn't a magic word that cures parenting woes. You can support me all day long but unless you're going to stay in my house and get up twice in the night to argue with a screaming baby who desperately wants fed but hates latching on then your support is purely nominal.

If bf is a task requiring an army of backup then when are we going to admit that for lots of women, it's really effing hard.

Oh and we are the same generation. None of her circle studied post GCSE/some vocational 16-18 level, whereas pretty much everyone in mine had at least a degree, not sure if that has any impact