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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH told me to "sort out my grey hair"

88 replies

Nearly47 · 29/04/2019 18:21

So my, not so dear at the moment, DH said I need to sort out my grey hairs. We were going for an walk around nearby woods so I didn't bother to even combing my hair so was a bit of a mess. But then he looks at me and says: " you need to sort out you grey hair". I am unreasonable to be really angry and tell him to sort out his belly, get a hair implant, sort out wrinkly face and list every fault I find on him? A little bit tongue in cheek but also pissed off at double stardards of society Angry I have a few strands but it didn't really bother untill now

OP posts:
Loopytiles · 29/04/2019 18:22

That was very rude of him.

RosemarysBush · 29/04/2019 18:24

So did you tell him he needs to sort out his whatever? I would have and my DH would have said touché.

SweetestSugar · 29/04/2019 18:28

The answer to this is simple. Say, "OK dear, I will do once you sort out your grey hair first."

Bodear · 29/04/2019 18:31

Was he being serious? If he was trying to be nice (tell you something he thought you wanted to know) then I’d have reacted differently than if he telling you to deal with it. I realise I may be grasping at straws in trying to find a more reasonable motivation but I’m trying not to condemn him.

Singlenotsingle · 29/04/2019 18:35

Funny how it's still double standards. He's perfection personified, I suppose? Has he got grey hair?

NottonightJosepheen · 29/04/2019 18:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Alsohuman · 29/04/2019 18:39

I’m surprised he’s still breathing.

RomanyQueen1 · 29/04/2019 18:41

Oh yes, tell him to get a hair transplant, that should do it and whilst he's at it, his belly is a turn off. Grin

saganorenscarandcoat · 29/04/2019 18:41

A male friend of mine recently told me via a text message to grow my hair back and then put the crossed finger emoji. This friend is very overweight. What got to me is he obviously thought he was perfect that he could tell someone who is very happy with her hair what he deems looks better. We're no longer speaking Grin

HelenaDove · 29/04/2019 18:45

is he going to put his money where his mouth is and pay for salon colour.

Tinkobell · 29/04/2019 18:55

Blooming cheeky beggar he is OP. I'd have a few choice words!

katseyes7 · 29/04/2019 18:55

My ex husband once said to me "if you're not happy about your weight, do something about it!" l was about two stone overweight. He was a 16 stone man 5'10" with a 48" waist shoehorned into size 36" waist jeans, with them under his belly like Desperate Dan.
Divorce soon sorted that out....

Missingstreetlife · 29/04/2019 18:55

Shave your head!

Springwalk · 29/04/2019 18:56

I can dye my hair but that sagging gut of yours is going to need a whole lot more work darling

Smellslikemiddleagespirit · 29/04/2019 18:56

Did you actually say that, though, about his belly and stuff? I really hope so. Cheeky sod.

But don’t go blaming “society”. This was your DH.

LillithsFamiliar · 29/04/2019 18:56

It depends on your relationship. I'd tell DH if he needed a haircut or a shave. If he said to me I needed to sort out my grey hair, I'd say 'oh is it looking really bad/obvious?'
So it's not a double standard in our relationship - and probably not particularly relevant to your question Grin

DizzyPhillips · 29/04/2019 18:57

if you're not happy about your weight, do something about it!

What on Earth is the issue with saying this to your partner? My husband bangs on and on about his weight. I say this to him fairly regularly. I’m not saying I’m particularly bothered about his weight. I’m saying stop moaning and deal with it 🤷🏻‍♀️

llangennith · 29/04/2019 18:58

I'd have asked him if he'd looked in a mirror recently.

You were very restrained OP!

Ellie56 · 29/04/2019 18:58

How rude! And yes absolutely tell him to sort out his fat belly and wrinkly face!

OhTheRoses · 29/04/2019 18:58

Hmm he shouldn't have said it and mine never has but possibly because I sort it and take a lot of care over my appearance in a natural sort of way. He too is always clean and tidy and watches his weight.

ThatCurlyGirl · 29/04/2019 18:59

What a horrible thing to say :(

I'd be more upset than angry at first and I'd feel like never brushing it or dying it because I wouldn't want him to think that saying cunty things would pressure me to change myself.

Poor you, as if you need your partner saying that kind of shitty stuff to you on a nice walk!

StillMedusa · 29/04/2019 19:00

I'd tell him I was going to grow it very long and very grey Grin

(In fact that IS what I'm doing... I grew out the colour and now I'm growing my grey streaked hair long... and my dh loves it)

Unless he's a Jason Momoa look alike I'd tell him to get stuffed!

Ravenesque · 29/04/2019 19:00

I've known far too many fugly men who think that they have the right to tell a woman what to do with her appearance. I can only imagine that when they look in the mirror they wear the world's strongest beer goggles and see Brad Pitt or George Clooney or [insert name of your fantasy fuck here].

Tell him to get to fuck. Nicely mind. N.b. not saying LTB, but do serve him his arse on a plate.

cardibach · 29/04/2019 19:01

*is he going to put his money where his mouth is and pay for salon colour^
I hope this is tongue in cheek. In case it isn’t, why should she want one? Why do you think money is the reason she hasn’t? I love my grey.

AdoraBell · 29/04/2019 19:01

YANBU

I would have told he has to sort out his attitude.