To leave a 2 year old for 10 mins

[BlueSuedeStiletto]

2 year old asleep in a cot they can't get out of. Needed to pop to the shops. 10 minutes away if that, child asleep the whole time, doors locked etc. Friend is horrified. WIBU?

So you wouldn't leave your niece alone if you were looking after her because she's. It yours

But if she was yours you would leave her for 10mins

Good job you haven't got children then

I also only found out about mumsnet post-children because I actually thought, ha ha that it was mums giving each other advice. How foolish of me now.

I think it should be just mums/maybe dads too to to be honest. That was obviously who it was aimed at in the first place and that’s whose opinions I value about my children. It’s a bit frustrating when someone posts their opinions and then you find out they don’t have kids?? No offence but I would never have offered advice to a parent because I knew diddly before I had kids. So it would be nice if the forum was as intended rather than having people who think it’s clever to start a thread about leaving a two year home alone, apparently as a debate??!!

Sb74 thank you exactly what i was trying to say but then everyone jumped on the band wagon! I didnt know anything when i was childless i was self centred made stupid decisions came out with stupid things! And then i had kids 4 of them and new what reality was about as it dropped on my head like a tonne of bricks! Thats all i meant! And the fact that the op has said that she would leave her child alone and she doesnt have children says it all! And when i come on mumsnet to read i absolutely appreciate the posters that are parents, who understand and post wisely, with common sense!!

Norma27 I think your story about your stepdad actually proves that had he had a toddler at home, they would have been safer in their cot than getting run over with him. If he had taken the toddler they would have also been run over. That is the point people are making. When I had 3 very young children and one was at a nearby preschool, it was actually safer for me to leave them asleep in their cots than to take them across a busy road to get her and then try and cross the road back home with a 3 , 2 and 1 year old. I have already mentioned that we were indeed later involved in a bit and run accident whilst crossing the road and yet I never in that time got home to find that either of my 2 youngest had gone from deep sleep to hysterical. Mine used to wake slowly and chat to themselves until I went to get them up. I would have had to ignore them a long time to get to hysterical screaming. If either were awake I would take them with me but no way was I going to wake a sleeping baby to drag them across a busy dangerous road and back. They needed a good sleep and we're safer in their cot. Please people read the article about how we judge based on what we think is moral and not actual risk.

Vdbfamily, no thanks. I’m sorry but I don’t respect anything you say because you think it’s ok and have left your children at home alone. Very poor parenting. Are we going to move past this nonsense at some point or are people going to continue to show themselves in this bad light?

Also, to say the example of a man being run over (which I personally think is an extremely insensitive thing to comment on) is ridiculous. Children are always safer with adult supervision. What a ridiculously insensitive thing to say about when the story was regarding a posters step-dad.

I just can’t believe you smugly and confidently talk about how you left your children sleeping rather than take them across a busy road??! This is so wrong. How are people so stupid to not realise this and come on here proudly telling people??!! It beggars belief.

What Sb74* just said! I swear you are in my brain, my thoughts!!! Lol! Everything im thinking you say! Its so weird! I was saying to my hubby exactly what you just said!

Ha ha! 😊

I have absolutely zero problem with non-parents being on this site - the more the merrier, and it seems extremely churlish / mean-spirited to actively want to exclude them. Seriously? Grow up.

But I’m afraid I will take what they say with a grain of salt, when it comes to what you should or should put do, in terms of caring for DC.

Caveat for those prone to wilfully misunderstanding: unless they’re a teacher, nurse, nanny or other qualified individual. In which case I’d take advice on their area of expertise, but probably be less inclined to take it on things they have no direct experience of, i.e. actual parenting.

It just makes me die how you carry your children (cooking them so to speak) in your belly for basically 9/10 months and thats stress in itself keeping them from harm by eating right not over exerting having regular check ups, being sick for a good 7 months of pregnancy, swollen feet, hands etc aches and pains, then giving birth myself i nearly died with my last 3 children each bloomin' time and then at the end of all that having these beautiful lovely bundles that you want to wrap up in cotton wool and shelter from harm and look after and nurture them, but then all of a sudden its ok to just "pop out" and "nip to shop" or school or whatever and put them in danger, actually not be there at all parenting or overseeing your little ones safety!!! My mind is fried it boggles at that thought!!

I think some people might be looking for Netmums rather than Mumsnet?

I'm a mum but i'm not just a mum, i'm also a woman, a daughter, an employee, a wife, a friend and many many other things. It's good to be able to chat/debate/get opinions etc on all sorts of stuff, sometimes from people who've been through the whole experience and sometimes it's good to get views from people who aren't clouded by the emotions.

I do get that sometimes it's hard to get a relatable view from someone who isn't in the same position as you. It's frustrating when parents of 2 year olds think that they are being insightful on the teen board when they are giving advice on what they imagine it's like to have a teenager rather than the reality. Of course many people without teenagers have great advice but some is just stupid. That tends to be from people whose view you wouldn't want anyway. the nature of a forum is that less than half of the answers to any post are likely to be useful..

Pretty sure that'd be classified as child negligence and you can be prosecuted for it. You say the shop is 10 mins away so a 20 minute plus round trip. ANYTHING could happen in 20 minutes. Choking to death, waking and crying for you and you don't come running, climbing out of the cot and cracking their head open on something, fire, a fit, anything. Is it really worth risking your childs life to get to the shops? If its that important stick him/her in their pram and take them. You might have done this before and been lucky. Next time you may not be. Be a responsible parent.

Exactly... makes no sense at all. The most precious thing in the world to you and you’d just leave it home alone for anyone’s taking??

I see Mrs penfold is back with words of wisdom again.

Think you’re being a tad facetious there Mrs penfold. That’s a completely different thread.

I wonder if all you people saying you leave your kids home alone blah blah blah, loud and proud to be crappy neglectful parents, would dare say it to social services in real life? Would you all be so brazen and flippant then? Oh sorry, I forgot you were social services apparently Mrs penfold??. Not sure I believe that one.
The power of autonomy.

Welcome to team decent and sensible Violetglow. 😊 there a few left on the thread.

Yes welcome

Its nice when you know that there is a slither of hope for humanity when normal rational sensible parents come on here and give there opinion!

I wouldn't leave a two year old. Not for two minutes, never mind ten. And it's not because I think something might happen because logic tells me the chances of that are exceptionally slim! I wouldn't do it because I couldn't stand the thought of my two year old waking up and not knowing where I was for ten minutes. My twins are older now but at this age I would have a mobile monitor with me as they slept/napped so that if they woke I'd be there in seconds. Anything else is incomprehensible to me!

And that’s why you’re a doublefunmum 😊.

It most certainly is good to know, hanywany. Got a bit worrying for a while but think the balance has tipped in favour of normality again.

Haneywaney if you read my posts both on this thread and others I have not passed any judgement on either your or anyone else's parenting.

But you know what? I'm going to now.

Your judgemental prejudiced attitude towards other people. Towards anyone who doesn't think and act EXACTLY like you and your assertion that only parents are valuable people and entitled to post here or express an opinion is pretty grim. If you are raising your children to think as do rather than to respect other people then I think you are a terrible parent and I feel sorry for them.

And that DoubleFunMum is how a parent is supposed to feel! It should come naturally for parents to feel incomprehensible at the thought of leaving there child for any amount of time! Your childs safety, life is not just a whim, a stupid split second decision which you just take for granted!! They didnt ask to be brought into this world so its your job as a parent to take responsibilty for them at all times! You dont get that break just because you fancy nippin out for 10, thats not how parenting works!!

When I had 3 very young children and one was at a nearby preschool, it was actually safer for me to leave them asleep in their cots than to take them across a busy road to get her and then try and cross the road back home with a 3 , 2 and 1 year old.

It’s unlikely that you can say with any certainty which option is safest. Your perception was that it would be safest to leave two young children at home alone, which isn’t the same thing.

Bluesuede , how you can call anyone a bad parent is beyond me. You come on here posting some stupid “debate” about something that isn’t worthy of debate and then admit that you would leave your own child at home alone. Who’s the terrible potential parent there?

I agree with hanywany that it would be nice to have a parents only forum because being a parent brings challenges that really only other parents can truly relate to. It’s called mumsnet so it should do what it says on the tin. It’s not called “anyone who fancies joining net” but unfortunately that’s how it is. Hanywany sounds like a great mum.