To think that some mumsnetters....

[Gettingthroughthedays]

...shouldn't be so bloody horrible? I'm quite sure everyone can give a different opinion without being nasty.

Who does that help? No one. And unless you want to help, why comment unless you enjoy hurting others? If that's the case maybe YOU need some help. Of the professional kind.

I'm almost certain no I've speaks to others like that in real life... unless they have a very lonely one.

People ask for advice because they have a problem, whether you agree or not.

Rant over.

Totally agree.

Because some people think their remarks are funny.

Thank you. I'm bracing myself for abuse lol. All the stuff about cyber bullying re. Kids and the devastating effects then adults do it to each other. Might push someone over the edge, you never know.

I'm with you. There should be more love in the world.

Twas always thus since the dawn of forums and the like. As it happens I'd say Mumsnet is probably a much more kinder space than mostsome other forums and social media sites.

YesIcancan they must do but it's funny only to them and shows a total lack of empathy for others.

I hate when posters say "YABU", but without giving a reason. If you've got something to say. Just come out and say it.

And don't get me started on those stupid dismissive biscuits.

When posters.talk in codes. Such as naice ham, pom bears, cutted up pears. What does all that even mean If you don't understand something it can come over clique

I think some people bully and then the mob culture kicks in and people don’t realise they are even doing it and no they wouldn’t dream of speaking to anyone in RL the same way.

No I understand that Vladmir. Doesn't make it morally right. No one has been horrible to me directly but I see it often and worry about the people involved.

Use the report button, that's what it's for.

If you want to see more love in the world you aren't going to see it in the AIBU topic on MN that's for sure.

And don't get me started on those stupid dismissive biscuits.

Lol I know. I know people can get carried away but surely as adults we should think before we type? If not, what are we teaching our children?

Yep. On my thread yesterday when talking about my alcohol dependency, one poster (in 3 seperate comments) stated that the thread was “attention seeking wanking”, my plan (to improve myself) “was a pipe dream” and finally that I was a “fucking joke”.

How lovey some people are.

I agree. I have a particular dislike for when an OP posts about her shitty relationship and someone pipes up with "Why did you breed with this man?" or some other helpful comment.

I'm not saying I'm perfect. I'm never going to be prefect, I'm.human.
However I always do my best to be as constructful as possible. If I think someone is being unreasonable.
I'll explain why in a nice way.
We don't know anyone's thought process or what sort of life they lead/day they're having.
That one nasty comment could push someone over the edge.
Thinking what you like is one thing. Saying what you like is very much another

I think a lot of users now see posting on MN (and elsewhere) as similar to flicking through a magazine or zapping through channels to see what catches their attention. Sort of light entertainment and distraction, which of course it is to an extent, but it's like there's a "disconnect" and they're a bit oblivious to the fact that they're directing their words at a real person.

Of course quite a few are just vicious arseholes who do actually get a kick out of upsetting other people!

Advice should be offered honestly and with good faith. If they can't manage that then they really should keep their bilious comments for general social media sites and not ones where people are asking for support or advice. No need!

YABU

It's the pile ons I hate. People wanting to be part of it and posting competitively nasty comments to the OP. I've been on here over ten years and I have never joined in a pile on. They disgust me.

Another 'you're all bitches' thread

If you think people are piling in, being rude, breaking talk guidelinesor just plain 'not in the spirit' then take it up on the thread and/or report to MNHQ.

Starting a TAAT about an unspecified set of other threads, bitching about an unspecified set of other posters never achieves anything in terms of problematic posts.

But has in the past been used to undermine MN, by branding everyone as bitches (necessary the quote at the start of this post)

Thanks all (barring the couple who aren't in the spirit of this thread lol!)

I get people are disconnected and understand people being dragged in at times.... but maybe if even one person has a look at this and rethinks how they communicate it will be worthwhile.

Marlena1

Wrong thread?

Yep. On my thread yesterday when talking about my alcohol dependency, one poster (in 3 seperate comments) stated that the thread was “attention seeking wanking”, my plan (to improve myself) “was a pipe dream” and finally that I was a “fucking joke”.

That is bloody awful. Well done you admitting you need help and seeking advice. Ignore the hateful comments, you should be proud of yourself.

"Advice should be offered honestly and with good faith. If they can't manage that then they really should keep their saccharine comments for general social media sites and not ones which are renowned for straight talking and telling posters what they need to hear, which might nit be the same as what they want to hear"

fixed that for you