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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU or is this friend being ultra-picky?

559 replies

scarbados · 24/04/2019 13:14

We moved to a small coastal town from a big city 3 years ago and were happy with the idea that we'd probably have friends visiting, especially during summer. We have a spare room with ensuite bathroom and it's always ready for visitors.

If people are staying, they're welcome to join us in whatever we do, go their own way or a mixture. Sometimes they eat with us, other times they eat out and at others we all eat out together. We never expect them to pay for our meals but it's nice when they do. Neither do we ever expect payment from our guests.

But ... the couple due to arrive tomorrow for 3 nights have just messaged me and asked me to make sure there's white bread and strawberry jam here for their breakfasts, and a carton of orange juice because she doesn't drink tea or coffee. (There's a supermarket at the end of the road which will be open when they get here so they could pick up their own stuff when they arrive.) Then I got a second message from the male of the pairing asking me to 'please make sure there's a clean throw over the sofa and the cat doesn't sit on it before they arrive' as after the last visit he noticed cat hair on his jeans. I use a pet hair brush daily on the sofa as I know the cat loves to sleep on it. He doesn't sit on any of the other chairs in the house, where the guest could easliy sit but he prefers the sofa.

I feel like suggesting he does his own shopping and brings a clothes brush, or books into one of the many hotels in town. He's getting 3 nights free accommodation and fed for at least 4 meals while he's here and seems to be trying to set out a list of requirements I have to meet.

AIBU to be seriously pissed off and tempted to tell them I'll book a hotel room on their behalf and they're paying for it?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
20
Whoopstheregomyinsides · 26/04/2019 07:29

Can’t wait to hear how they behave!

Dillydallyalltheway · 26/04/2019 07:36

Maybe say Something like, we are looking forward to seeing you and you are more than welcome to stay free of charge, but I’m afraid I don’t have time to run to the shops for you and I will try but can’t guarantee that the cat won’t jump on the sofa. If you are worried about this, there’s a brilliant hotel a few minutes down the road, would you like the details.

TapasForTwo · 26/04/2019 07:57

Loving all the cat pictures

VQ1970 · 26/04/2019 08:06

You can have this little shit, he's just be a blackbird in so he comes with lots of black feathers as well as ginger hairs. He's currently sat outside his locked catflap waiting for me to let him back in.

AIBU or is this friend being ultra-picky?
VQ1970 · 26/04/2019 08:07

*bought me a blackbird in

scarbados · 26/04/2019 08:12

@Knittingsavesme - 6 of those huge bags, everything from hand-dyed laceweight to Poundland acrylic. Have you heard about women whose greatest fear in life is that they'll die before their husband and he'll sell it for what she told him it cost? That's me!

@TigerTooth If my only problem in life was some gobshite on a computer screen choosing to accuse me of being a liar, I'd be a very lucky woman.

Update - they went out last night and got sandwiches from Tesco before they went to the pub. They also brought back their breakfast stuff and some things for us - wholemeal bread, oranges, peanut butter and milk. They came in quietly, didn't leave the lights on and remembered to lock the door behind them. This is revolutionary for them! I'm sure she had a quiet word with him before they arrived.

J and I also had a good catch-up about what we've been up to and what's going on at work. And the talk about a new data storage system gave us a chance to sound off about how the people who inflict systems on us don't understand how we use them and are largely clueless twats. The boyfriend is one of those IT twats we were talking about and it seemed like J was relishing the conversation as much as I was.

OP posts:
BarbaraofSevillle · 26/04/2019 08:34

Have you heard about women whose greatest fear in life is that they'll die before their husband and he'll sell it for what she told him it cost

That would be the female version of the men who fear they'll die before their wives and she'll sell his bikes for what he told her they cost. Yes, I know, sexism, NAWALT and NAMALT etc.

Go Reggie. I think cats know who doesn't like them and they use their charms to try and convert, or even better, the cat takes pleasure in irritating a human who is probably not properly trained in the art of cat slavery.

CoolCatKat · 26/04/2019 09:08

Is this a joke? Thats hilarious! Depends how good a friendship you have but I would definitely send a sarcastic reply.

SihtricsHorseWitnere · 26/04/2019 09:14

Sandwiches from Tesco and then went out and all they brought you were a few bits? Didn't even ask you out for a drink (know you don't drink alcohol but pubs serve other drinks)? Tighter than a duck's arse but you seem to find this totally acceptable so crack on.

TigerTooth · 26/04/2019 09:24

@TigerTooth If my only problem in life was some gobshite on a computer screen choosing to accuse me of being a liar, I'd be a very lucky woman

TigerTooth · 26/04/2019 09:26

Nice - not sure what a gibshite is - not a term I use, but rather that than be surrounded by “friend” who are disliked, and being walked over - why don’t you get some friends you actually don’t want to bitch about inline? Weird.

DartmoorDoughnut · 26/04/2019 09:53

Not sure if anyone has found it yet but this is a great read and the Mexican house thief post is on page 6 (reading it on my phone so may be different elsewhere!) www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1735637-Have-you-ever-encountered-anyone-this-cheeky?pg=6&order=

DartmoorDoughnut · 26/04/2019 09:55

@TigerTooth missed your original post but your latest is the very definition of a gobshite aka spouting off ridiculous notions and being stroppy with it HTH ...

anitagreen · 26/04/2019 09:55

Loving this thread the cat pictures are so cute sorry op Grin

DarlingNikita · 26/04/2019 10:15

Is his anus winking at the bloke’s pillow yet?
That's one of the best sentences I've EVER read Grin

OP, glad they seem to be behaving.

CBsDad · 26/04/2019 11:02

I am less annoyed with the person who just stole my new bike then I am with your guests.

GiantKitten · 26/04/2019 11:15

TigerTooth

Nice - not sure what a gibshite is - not a term I use, but rather that than be surrounded by “friend” who are disliked, and being walked over - why don’t you get some friends you actually don’t want to bitch about inline? Weird.

That certainly added a lot to the thread. Well done you Hmm

scarbados · 26/04/2019 11:20

Latest update for all except one nasty person - They're up and around without taking hours in the shower today. Just had a lovely long chat with J while he seems to be keeping himself out of the way. She's definitely said something to him. Reggie's still on the sofa, decorating the nasty fake fur throw.

OP posts:
thetemptationofchocolate · 26/04/2019 11:28

Reggie is my new hero :)

Bookworm4 · 26/04/2019 11:33

I think Reggie could sort out the Brexit mess.

Snog · 26/04/2019 11:33

Ask them why it is that they prefer to stay at your house rather than book into a hotel and then meet up for a meal to spend time with you.

They are rude free loaders OP.

FriarTuck · 26/04/2019 11:40

Reggie is a complete Star and seriously cute.

ScrambledToe · 26/04/2019 11:45

Have you heard about women whose greatest fear in life is that they'll die before their husband and he'll sell it for what she told him it cost

That would be the female version of the men who fear they'll die before their wives and she'll sell his bikes for what he told her they cost. Yes, I know, sexism, NAWALT and NAMALT etc.

Totally sexist barbara my bike costs way more than my dh’s 😂

BruceAndNosh · 26/04/2019 11:45

I wonder if she has a friend on MN who altered her to this thread?

Deadpoet · 26/04/2019 11:53

I do hope you’re putting rose petals on the bed and mints on the pillows!!
Tell them to pop to the shop before arriving and make sure you give the cat a good brush in the clean throw and the bed. CF’s at their finest.