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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Cake-gate

529 replies

8Wina4 · 23/04/2019 23:59

I work in an office environment, in a team of around 20. Before the Easter weekend, I was chatting in the staff room on a break about how I've recently really got into baking, and one of my colleagues jokingly said that she wouldn't mind if I bought some cake to work for her to try. I promised I'd bring some home made cakes in after Easter.

Fast forward to today. I take in four different homemade cakes. I also took in some little vegan cake bites from Tesco, as we have 2 vegans in the office and I wanted them to be able to eat something nice too (everything I baked had flour/eggs in)

One of the vegans approached me at lunch, and told me that she was really disappointed that I hadn't made the effort to home bake anything vegan, and that I had promised homemade cakes, so I should have provided that for everyone. She said she didn't like the vegan cakes I'd bought from Tesco, and that she was fed up with being left out of team lunches/treats.

I was a bit taken aback, so apologised. But the more I think about it, the more I think she was actually the unreasonable one...

Thoughts?

OP posts:
RidingMyBike · 26/04/2019 15:58

This happened to me once. I actually did look up vegan cake recipes, went for a special shopping trip and bought the ingredients (of which there seemed to be several more than in a non-vegan cake), then wished I’d just bought a vegan cake in the free-from aisle as it was a lot of hassle to make the cake and I ended up with ingredients left over that I wouldn’t have used in anything else!

kalopali · 26/04/2019 16:26

YANBU. The fussy twat can fuck off to the far side of fuck.

Veterinari · 26/04/2019 19:01

This has been fun, and now I know that eggs do come from chickens arses.

Except they don’t
They come from the oviduct via the cloaca.

StillCoughingandLaughing · 26/04/2019 19:06

Can't believe the number of people posting vegan recipes.
Who the f**k would be inclined to make a cake for anyone so obnoxiously rude.
I never rewarded rude behaviour in my children why do it with an adult Confused

Did you miss the bit where the OP mentions she has TWO vegan colleagues - one of whom was super-grateful to be included? Maybe she might want to bake for her? Or for other vegan friends? Maybe, as she enjoys baking, she might enjoy the challenge? Why leap to the conclusion that she’s planning on ‘rewarding’ the ungrateful woman?

ThunderStorms · 26/04/2019 19:15

Did you miss the bit where the OP mentions she has TWO vegan colleagues - one of whom was super-grateful to be included? Maybe she might want to bake for her? Or for other vegan friends? Maybe, as she enjoys baking, she might enjoy the challenge? Why leap to the conclusion that she’s planning on ‘rewarding’ the ungrateful woman?

But she's not planning on rewarding her -other people appear to be offering up suggestions so she can (or it may just be they're offering suggestions ...).

The other vegan colleague was happy with the shop bought cake 🤷🏾‍♂️

CletusVanDamme · 26/04/2019 20:04
Hmm
Hanumantelpiece · 26/04/2019 21:34

I was posting the recipe to show that it wasn't a massive challenge to make a vegan cake. I wasn't suggesting that OP made it for her colleague. As I said, the colleague was rude and ungrateful. Cake was provided, and colleague chose to be an arse about it.

Lweji · 26/04/2019 21:37

Except they don’t
They come from the oviduct via the cloaca.

That's what the pp was referring to (explained in a previous post).

mmgirish · 27/04/2019 00:50

Yes she was called unreasonable - rtft to see

Ayemama · 27/04/2019 01:04

If you want to be very passive aggressive, do make a vegan cake (I’ve made a chocolate one before it turned out really fine) then make it for a day that you know the cheeky fucker won’t be at work.
Obviously don’t be too obvious about this and just say oh what a shame you missed it.

hellenbackagen · 27/04/2019 01:06

I'd suggest that since she's the vegan and you sent she bake for the vegan workforce and you'll bake for the others.
Cf!

PersonaNonGarter · 27/04/2019 01:17

Vegan cake is never as good as real cake.

Actual home baked brownie or vegan brownie? No contest.

icclemunchy · 27/04/2019 01:37

Presumably she will be baking for the office next? And of course she'll be baking "normal" cakes with eggs and butter alongside her vegan offerings since she is so keen to have every diet catered for!

ivykaty44 · 27/04/2019 06:34

PNC I disagree with you after my experience, the brownie was seriously better than any other I’d had

RosamundDarnley · 27/04/2019 07:26

I cooked the vegan lemon cake mentioned up thread, and it is light, fluffy and very lemony. www.bbcgoodfood.com/user/4614791/recipe/vegan-lemon-cake

We're not vegan btw Smile

BertrandRussell · 27/04/2019 07:28

“And of course she'll be baking "normal" cakes with eggs and butter alongside her vegan offerings since she is so keen to have every diet catered for!”
What- that special diet where you can eat everything including vegan food? Hmm

Lweji · 27/04/2019 08:17

I think you missed the point of that post, Bertrand. Grin
Would the vegan complainer be prepared to bake 5 cakes for the team? Even two cakes?
It was asking if they'd want to go through all the trouble they wanted the OP to have had.

Plus, just because most people can eat a vegan cake, it doesn't mean they'll want to or like it.

BertrandRussell · 27/04/2019 09:00

Nobody is denying that Rude Lady is rude and does not deserve cakes- bought or home made.

I was being exasperated by the commonly expressed but totally bonkers belief that vegans ought to accommodate other special diets. Including the special diet that involves being able to eat anything except Vegan food. it needs a name- the Clarkson Diet perhaps? The Hopkins Diet?

StillCoughingandLaughing · 27/04/2019 09:00

But she's not planning on rewarding her -other people appear to be offering up suggestions so she can (or it may just be they're offering suggestions ...).

The second one.

woollyheart · 27/04/2019 09:00

When you bake a treat for your team, it is optional. It is perfectly acceptable to bake your favourite recipes.

When someone brings in a treat that they have baked, you don't have to eat it! It is optional! If you are allergic, don't eat it. If your religion bans the ingredients, don't eat it. If the ingredients make you ill, don't eat it. If you have chosen to restrict your diet and you don't want to eat it, don't eat it. If you are fat, and you would prefer not to eat it, don't eat it. If you don't like it, don't eat it.

If they MAKE you eat it, then you should complain.

Lweji · 27/04/2019 09:08

Yes, I get that it was poorly phrased, Bertrand, but I think it was mostly about this particular vegan going through the trouble of baking and catering for different options, as she expected from the OP.

kikisparks · 27/04/2019 09:14

I’m vegan for animal rights and probably what some would consider a bit strong in my beliefs and I think YANBU. I never expect anyone to cater for me unless they invite me somewhere like their house or a wedding and even then I have low expectations and wouldn’t expect them to buy or bake me a cake or anything (although I’m thrilled if they do!). Your colleague was very rude.

Oblomov19 · 27/04/2019 09:16

She is entitled. As are most millennials.

kikisparks · 27/04/2019 10:50

Also I’d be very appreciative of the small vegan cake bites you bought! That was considerate.

BertrandRussell · 27/04/2019 10:58

“Yes, I get that it was poorly phrased, Bertrand, but I think it was mostly about this particular vegan going through the trouble of baking and catering for different options, as she expected from the OP.”
So you would expect a vegan to provide non vegan cakes if she was baking cakes for work?