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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Cake-gate

529 replies

8Wina4 · 23/04/2019 23:59

I work in an office environment, in a team of around 20. Before the Easter weekend, I was chatting in the staff room on a break about how I've recently really got into baking, and one of my colleagues jokingly said that she wouldn't mind if I bought some cake to work for her to try. I promised I'd bring some home made cakes in after Easter.

Fast forward to today. I take in four different homemade cakes. I also took in some little vegan cake bites from Tesco, as we have 2 vegans in the office and I wanted them to be able to eat something nice too (everything I baked had flour/eggs in)

One of the vegans approached me at lunch, and told me that she was really disappointed that I hadn't made the effort to home bake anything vegan, and that I had promised homemade cakes, so I should have provided that for everyone. She said she didn't like the vegan cakes I'd bought from Tesco, and that she was fed up with being left out of team lunches/treats.

I was a bit taken aback, so apologised. But the more I think about it, the more I think she was actually the unreasonable one...

Thoughts?

OP posts:
StrongerThanIThought76 · 26/04/2019 07:36

I'd go so far out of my way to make an absolutely AMAZING vegan cake. Take it in with no fanfare, present to the team as a homebake. Accept due praise from colleagues. When (after hovering on the sidelines feeling all righteous but indignant) c.f. moans about not being inclusive I'd take great pleasure in saying 'oh it was vegan, didn't I mention that?' just as I finished the last crumb.

strawberrisc · 26/04/2019 08:38

I would have burst out laughing and said "could you be any more of a walking stereotype?"

jcq17 · 26/04/2019 08:42

@StrongerThanIThought76 that's the best idea

frazzledasarock · 26/04/2019 10:38

Butter is definitely halal. Anything suitable for vegetarians and not containing alcohol is halal.

BertrandRussell · 26/04/2019 10:40

Sorry- not all butter is halal. It’s to do with the processing. It’s amazing how many things have traces of pork related products, for example.

frazzledasarock · 26/04/2019 10:42

The butters I buy always have ‘suitable for vegetarians’ in the packs.

Which ones have trace animal product on them? I imagine a lot of vegetarians will be upset that veg labelling is incorrect.

alligatorsmile · 26/04/2019 10:43

Some people are just arseholes. And some arseholes are vegan. Doesn't mean that all vegans are arseholes.

frazzledasarock · 26/04/2019 10:43

Not trying to be rude here I’m genuinely asking, as I always presumed butter was made from milk & only check for the vegetarian label as a matter of habit.

BertrandRussell · 26/04/2019 10:45

Presumably the ones that don’t have “suitable for vegetarians” on them? I’ve just checked the coop own brand in my fridge and it doesn’t.
I think some also use some sort of alcohol in the manufacturing process-which wouldn’t be an issue for vegetarians but would mean it wasn’t halal.

frazzledasarock · 26/04/2019 10:47

Lidl one says suitable for vegetarian in the allergy info. Ingredients are just contains milk.

I’m going to check other labels now.

Hanumantelpiece · 26/04/2019 10:59

It's easier to change the recipe a bit rather than make substitutes for butter/eggs when making vegan cakes.
This is my go-to basic recipe.

200g S-R flour
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp bicarb of soda
100g sugar (you can go up to 200g if you like sweeter cakes)
80ml vegetable oil
200 ml soya milk/oat milk/nut milk (whatever is most suitable)
20ml cider vinegar (or lemon juice, or orange juice or anything acidic)

Mix the milk and vinegar together and let it stand around 10 min.
Heat the oven to Gas 4 or equivalent, prepare cake tin/cases etc
Sieve the flour and powders into a mixing bowl
Mix in the sugar
Pour in the milk mixture and add the oil, then mix it all together well with a metal spoon. It doesn't matter if there are a few lumps, but you don't want pockets of dry stuff.
Tip into cake tin. Tap tin on work surface to release bubbles.
Bake.
Eat.

You can add all manner of flavours and things to this - chopped walnuts, coffee (if doing this you can use the coffee in the milk in the first place), lemon, orange, rhubarb, currants, chocolate...

I've made loads to this receipe and nobody has ever known (unless I've told them) that they don't contain butter or eggs.

woollyheart · 26/04/2019 11:07

Lovely! But don't you get people asking if it is gluten-free?

I've given up baking for larger groups and just take fruit or chocolate.

ralfeesmum · 26/04/2019 11:19

Ah, but she achieved her objective ie: she (unjustifiably) made you feel guilty whilst she grabbed the moral high ground AND made herself the centre of attention.

Also, she said you had "promised" and that she was "fed up with being left out" which makes her sound like tantrum-throwing 3 year old.....so who the hell gave her a job working with grown-ups?

Wot a tw*t she sounds!

RoastOx · 26/04/2019 11:34

She needs to remember that being vegan is a fucking lifestyle choice. How bloody rude!!!

RoastOx · 26/04/2019 11:35

I'd go so far out of my way to make an absolutely AMAZING vegan cake. Take it in with no fanfare, present to the team as a homebake. Accept due praise from colleagues. When (after hovering on the sidelines feeling all righteous but indignant) c.f. moans about not being inclusive I'd take great pleasure in saying 'oh it was vegan, didn't I mention that?' just as I finished the last crumb

AMAZING! OP please do this

PCohle · 26/04/2019 11:54

She sounds like an entitled CF. Why on earth should you go out of your way for someone so rude.

timeisnotaline · 26/04/2019 12:57

This has been fun, and now I know that eggs do come from chickens arses. Bonus lots of vegan cake recipes to save!

Mia184 · 26/04/2019 13:08

Here is a recipe for millionaire shortbread bars that contains ingredients for both vegan and non-vegan versions naturalnoshing.com/2012/05/28/millionaire-shortbread-src/

Both versions are great!

mmgirish · 26/04/2019 14:10

This is a crazy thread. OP bakes some nice cakes and helpfully buys vegan treats for the vegans. Then, people come on and say she is unreasonable! Madness, absolute madness.

CletusVanDamme · 26/04/2019 14:32

Can't believe the number of people posting vegan recipes.
Who the f**k would be inclined to make a cake for anyone so obnoxiously rude.
I never rewarded rude behaviour in my children why do it with an adult Confused

BertrandRussell · 26/04/2019 14:59

Nobody is suggesting the OP should bake Rude Woman a cake. Rather the opposite. Some of us are simply pointing out that should anyone wish to bake a vegan cake, it’s not the enormous expensive challenge fraught with abstruse ingredients some people seem to think. The thread has moved on.

BertrandRussell · 26/04/2019 15:00

“Then, people come on and say she is unreasonable! Madness, absolute madness.”
Has anyone said she was unreasonable?

CletusVanDamme · 26/04/2019 15:05

She was called unkind, although granted that was before the thread 'moved on'

BertrandRussell · 26/04/2019 15:16

I think I said it would have been kind to make one cake out of 4 that vegans could eat. Different from calling her unkind or saying that she should bake for Rude Woman.

I still think that. Which is why I posted my intial recipe, so that anyone in a similar position who felt like it could have a go.

CletusVanDamme · 26/04/2019 15:25

Well seeing as we are splitting hairs I believe the post said "it does seem a little unkind"