DP woman at work...

[Sotellmewhatyouwant]

So Dp works away a lot, often goes abroad to different places with different people.

This one girl who he has gone away with in the past has added him on Facebook and tried to initiate conversation saying how lovely it was to work with him etc.

She is known for trying it on with a lot of the men who she works with.

He is currently away for 8 days, with her, and others.
Now I know I shouldn't have done, (so don't flame me) but I looked on her social media and there are pictures of him that she has put up, by the pool in his swim wear type thing.
I asked him about this, as he had already lied to me the night before about going out for dinner with her and a few others, and he had flown off the handle asking why I'm looking and calling me a stalker and basically a fair few other names (including the C word which is a usual occurrence) 

Whilst I'm sat at home, AIBU to just ask that I don't see pictures of him plastered over social media after her already trying it with him (and him deleting it and lying about it) when she knows I exist?

According to DP - she has done this to get a reaction out of me. (I have never met this woman before and can't see any other reason as to why she would do this)

There are no other pictures of anyone else on this work trip that she has put up, only of him.

He has now ended the relationship while he is away as he feels I'm being completely unreasonable in asking him to just agree that it's a pretty shitty thing to see?

I'm annoyed at the lies that she was there, and about taking her side when he's already admitted that she tried it on last time...

He has now got so mad because I was upset, that he has blocked me on all forms of communication and gone out for drinks with her.

Fully ready to be flames and to be told IABU... 

Sounds like he’s got a guilty conscience to me, now he’s ended your relationship you can find someone who respects you. Don’t take him back when he comes crawling, start looking for somewhere cheaper to rent right now!

He sounds like a twat OP. Ending it and calling you the c word because you have seen something suspicious and called him out on it. You're better off without.

It’s sounding very much OVER OP
And as painful as it is , it’s for the best as he seems to have a replacement lined up already
I bet if you think hard there will have been other red flags ?

I think this has been going on for a while.

He sounds like a prick

You only checked to confirm what you pretty much already knew! Good luck

Op I hope you intend to keep the ddog?

OP this was the red flag for me She is known for trying it on with a lot of the men who she works with if he works with her how would you know this. Oh yes because he told you, he’s been putting in the ground work already having you dislike her and not blame him when she “comes on to him” which she probably didn’t. She has probably been listening to him complain about your relationship and has been fooled by him too.

You are better off without him. Good luck OP.

He calls you the C word. Surely you know you deserve better than that? In long relationships, there may be arguments and disagreements, but there is no excuse for name calling and abuse. Honestly, it may seem hard now, but I think this may have done you a massive favour and be the wake up call you need, before you end up with a house and children and total dependency on an unpleasant man.

Making you out to be the bad guy is classic shit boyfriend behaviour.

I’d be using the time you’ve got before he swans back in to hatch my escape plan, personally. You can’t spend your life with a man who behaves like this, especially not when he’s on a work trip.

Free yourself up to find a proper grown up.
Take the dog.

I’d say cheating too. And even if it isn’t calling you the c word and doing that is pretty shitty behaviour anyway. I think I’d take hisbroken up whilst he’s away as the end whatever he says and go out :)

He’ll probably come back, evidence will pop up he slept with her and he’ll do the old ‘we were on a break’ if you get back together.

She was only doing it to get a reaction out of you doesn't ring true as unless you were messaging her directly she wouldn't see your reaction.

So he lies to you regularly swears at you and has now ended a relationship over the phone over a silly argument

I think ywbu to have a go at him for someone else posting pictures of him on their social media - unless hes liked and commented on them all or you have proof he was encouraging her, he might not be able to control this. But given everything else you've said about him, hes done you a favour finishing things and I wouldn't be taking him back. He will probably use this as an opportunity to sleep with her now hes single and although its hurtful I'd try and have the attitude that she's welcome to him

Agree with posters that he has done this so he can have guilt free sex with her

This is almost exactly the scenario that played out when I was being cheated on by my ex, don’t be the mug I was and have his stuff ready to collect when he gets back.

He's ended it as he wants to shag her

What a shitbag

Rent out the spare room? (Move into other room, reconfigure things). Even if you rent out Monday to Friday then you might make enough without too much impact on your life?

Keep the house/dog - dump the fucker on the street.

He is shifting the blame to make out it is your fault

Sorry you wasted the last 4 years

What a tosser!

So sorry, OP.

Are you sure this is actually a work thing anyway? Sounds more like a holiday for two.

He’s reacted by blaming anyone but himself. Complete arse.

I hope you’re ok and have some rl support

Thank you all. I'm currently actually looking for a flat to move to with my little pup, going to make some calls today and try arrange viewings.

He is a total narcotic idiot. I'm sorry xx

At least you know he is a cheating cunt BEFORE you get married.

He told you she was the “office harlot”. He’ll have told her you’re “frigid, that you don’t have sex anymore but he can’t leave because you’re unstable” or some such utter bollocks.

He’s already shagging her, that ship will have sailed a while ago. He’s ended it because he thinks you’re either on the edge of having proof or have actually found something conclusive. This way he can gaslight you by saying “well I wasn’t shagging her but I am now because you pushed me to it” - it’s going to be you’re fault regardless.

He’ll likely try and reconcile once he’s home - bin him, he’s awful and abusive... and get an STI check.

basically a fair few other names (including the C word which is a usual occurrence)

For that alone I'd be well rid of him.

You deserve better..... he probably broke up with you so hes free to do what he wants while hes there then hell come home expecting everything to be honky dory while you do his laundry and cook his dinner...

You deserve better. In all likelihood he was already fucking her and dumped you to ease his guilty conscience and get you off his back. Good riddance to bad rubbish I say.