"It's like it suddenly becomes everyone else's business."
Well tbf you're making it their business when you stand in front of them telling them about it. You can't publicly announce something and not expect anyone to have an opinion.
"I think it is difficult if someone close to you is pregnant and it is unplanned, because you don't want to say congratulations until you know they actually want the baby."
I agree. Disingenuous to suggest that every single pregnancy is a case of unbridled joy.
On mn, and only on mn I think, there are so many ways to offend a pregnant woman. I sometimes think they must be some sort of special rarefied species. Surely you must realise that you are announcing a mundane thing that billions of people have done before and very few people are actually genuinely interested to hear about it.
Like every other area of life, people will have an opinion about it, or be desperately grasping for something relevant to say, or trying to initiate a conversation about the obvious elephant-in-the-room thing, or trying to give you the benefit of their own experiences.
If you simply can't cope with any suggestion of anything other than utter delight and enthusiasm, cut them off at the knees by saying 'I'm pregnant again and absolutely delighted with the small age gap, it's exactly what we wanted and we're not at all bothered that it'll be hard work'
I've had four btw, so have been on the receiving end of every possible comment : can't remember being offended or insulted by any of them.