To be annoyed that people can't just say congratulations.

[NotReadyForThisX2]

We've just announced I'm pregnant with Dc two (a little earlier than planned due to blabber mouth Dp). But not a single person friend or family has just said congratulations without adding there own little comment/judgement about how soon it is after Ds.
Yes I am aware without being told for the 50th time that there will only be 13 months between them and yes I'm sure we'll have our hands full. But if one more person asks me if we planned it or how we're going to manage, I think I'll scream.

What happened to just being polite and saying, oh how lovely, congratulations and then just talking about how stupid we are behind our backs.

Well I think some people like to look for offence when really none is intended.

Maybe they are just thinking aloud
Maybe they are just recalling their own experiences
Maybe they just don’t say exactly what you want them to say ...

well, it's just congratulations from me.
The very best of wishes x

I'm 35 and lived with DP for 5 years and people still asked if ours was planned 🤦 people are generally just dim when talking about pregnancy whatever the situation, I've noticed.
Hoping to be lucky enough to have a small age gap between ours so I can't wait for those conversations if things do work out as we would like....ignore them OP if you'd waited a while you'd have been plagued with being asked when they were going to get a sibling, you can't win.

It doesn't help that Dp is like a eager puppy and so excited to tell everyone, which he's doing. But the negative "oh how will you cope" "what were you thinking" comments are more aimed at me.
I didn't even want to tell them yet.

They must just be shocked or shocked and rude/stupid.

I must admit if someone had a baby at a few months old and told me they were pregnant again I would be a bit 😯 I would defo say congratulations and maybe something about how that will not be easy but I defo wouldn't ask anyone if they planned a baby, that's just rude.

Congratulations

I have 15 months between my eldest two, they are so close and have always had a playmate. They sneak into each other’s beds at night and we find them cuddled up asleep.

Maybe these people are a bit envious? I have a 6 month old now, and I’m feeling a bit jealous of you that there won’t be another little one arriving in my house in 6 months time!

Congratulations!!

There’s 15 months between me and my brother. It’s great!

Now you've made me glad that my reaction to my son and daughter-in-law when they told me my Granddaughter was having her 2nd baby 12 months after her first was "Wow! How wonderful!". And I meant it. Obviously I knew it might be hard work for her, but it didn't need to be said. Why would I risk spoiling that moment of great joy? And now, with her little boys coming up to their first and second birthdays, my granddaughter makes it look easy, and her children are a delight.

Congratulations myself and DB are only 7 months apart , we are very close and love each other very much we are both in out mid 50s but still make the effort to go out with just the 2 of us at least once a month

Congratulations, there are 13 months between my grandsons who, at 6 & 7 are so close it's unbelievable.

One of my good friends had 12 months between DC1 and DC2, then 16 months later had a DC3. People were so weird and rude about it, but she was delighted...so who cares?!

Her girls are teenagers now and have a lovely bond.

Congratulations!

It's clearly a completely normal response if that's what everybody is saying. Can you honestly say you wouldn't have made similar comments in the past? It just sounds like somebody making conversation to me.... or just thinking from their own perspective (I couldn't have handled that small an age gap for example).

As long as they are also saying congratulations then I think it's all good?

Congratulations!

I got it loads with my pair (19 months between them), it’s been fab. They get on great (mostly) and it meant we got through nappies and sleepless nights in one long go!

I know someone who’s DC are 11 month apart, and they’re expecting another which will mean for 3 months they will have 3 under 3. It’s not uncommon to have kids close together

Congrats OP
My DC are Just shy of 3 years apart. (me and my sister are 3 years and 2 days!)

DP grandparents told us to "tie a knot in it next time or use decent rubber" when we told them we was pregnant with second! (I was not happy at all over this remark) they didn't seem bothered throughout my whole pregnancy, but as soon as he was here they loved him,... They've also told us they don't want anymore great grandkids and asked if I'm going to be sterilised! (we would like one more in a fair few years!) so I kind of know how you feel,
Ignore them., you and DH are happy and that's the main thing! Nod and smile :)

Congratulations!

I'm in the exact same position tbh, number 2 is due 2 weeks after DD's 1st birthday and I've had plenty of family members asking if I can handle it or telling me I'm going to struggle. I've even had my grandma bitching to my sister that I haven't let me self recover and what not - not that it's her business! I get why they say it but it would be so much better if people would fully show their support.

Don't get worked up over it as they'll all love your lo when he/she arrives!

Props to you for even thinking about shagging 4 months after having a baby OP. And congratulations!

It probably is @blueyellowgreen and I already said I don't think it's said in nastiness at all.
But it's still annoying when you've been subjected to it all day.

Congratulations!

Fwiw I can relate. We have a 15 month old DS and I'm due to give birth to DD in just over a week.

Not everybody felt the need to pass judgement and friends were lovely but there was definitely some, in among a few 'lighthearted' comments about how we didn't mess around

Very annoying, definitely.

I'll never forget one co-workers response when I told her I was pregnant with DS, she simply said "omm naughty" in a patronising tone. The tit.

Anyhow.. it doesn't matter how soon anybody thinks it is because it's absolutely bugger all to do with them in the first place, enjoy your pregnancy

It doesn't seem uncommon? I know people who actively try to get pregnant straight after DC1 so as to have baby days done! Seems odd to comment negatively, even if in jest.

Then again, I think that people don't understand when it's not them that's pregnant. I'm expecting my first and am amazed by how many people ask if it was planned. From friends I take it it's just because I never mentioned trying, and they're curious. From collegues or near strangers I find it odd, especially as the implication is that I've 'messed up' somehow. (Not really young or anything, just recently started in a very competitive industry where people seem to think that gives them a right to comment / ask).

Congratulations.
The first pregnancy is special because it shows you can do it. The subsequent pregnancies not so much. Not a reflection on your children
People like to make conversation. What do you want them to say ..”brilliant you’ve had sex again since the first?”

Congratulations OP.
As a mother of two, who are 13 months apart, I can confirm that you WILL have your hands full for a very LONG time. So maybe people are just helping you adjust the expectations. Saying that it is none of their business; it’s not like they will be coming around to change nappies and make bottles for you. I would ignore them and make sure you look after yourself.

Congratulations! It's lovely having babies close together. Two of mine are only 12 months apart. They had their own language and are still the best of friends.

Congratulations! How lovely to have 2 so close in age. I'd love to be in the position to be able to do that.

I found when I was pregnant I got a lot of personal questions from people who had no place to be asking them.

No matter how long you waited after DC1 it would always be "oh, how with you cope with 2 under 2/3/4/5"

I understand it must be annoying but some people just blurt out the first thing they can think of and assume they would be the first to make that comment. So to them it's innocent but to you it's the millionth time you have heard it.

Don't let it spoil your happiness

Congratulations!

I sympathise with the comments, but I think people get as far as thinking about how they would feel if it happened to them (empathising), and have a moment of light-hearted shock/horror, which they then express before they think about it any deeper.

For them, it's also likely the only (novel) interaction they have with you that day and quite new and interesting, whereas as you say, you're subjected to it multiple times, all day long.

My sympathies, and I hope it all passes soon so you can focus on the joy of meeting your new little person.