To wonder what exactly middle class and upper class Mums do to be skinny

[Humpy84]

I am a Mum of a two year old turning three July. Not an age that he can be packed up for long walks in buggy.

I have gained weight and feeling overwhelmed by everything.

I have noticed and I think it is obvious that middle and upper class Mums tend to be slimmer.

I want to know if you identify this and if so what is your weekly shopping routine, meal plan, how do you exercise with or without toddler/s, tips and tricks etc, diet plans, etc etc.

A good fix for that is a stint volunteering in an impoverished country

Only the well off MC/UC can afford to do such things..

As a former skinny girl who became a fat girl when I had DS1 18 years ago, I struggled for many, many years to get back to my ‘real’ body shape. I lost stones and then slowly gained them back every time, plus a little more. I finally realized that my body just wants to be bigger, for reasons no scientist, nutritionist, shrink, guru or doctor has managed to explain. Until they do, dieting is a fool’s game. I will never win a war with my own body. Now I focus on staying super healthy, getting lots of exercise and eating quality food. I eat when I’m hungry and don’t worry about calories, fat grams, carbs or points of any sort. But I do avoid artificial sweeteners, transfats, high fructose corn syrup, highly processed foods, etc.

Being slim is largely a matter of genetic luck. All of the mums on hear claiming thy stay slim by skipping breakfast or busy busier than thou are deluding themselves into believing their metabolic luck is some sort of personal virtue. I’m going to put this is caps so it can’t be missed. BEING FAT IS NOT A CHARACTER FLAW. It’s just a little extra tissue your body wants to hang onto for some unknown reason. It doesn’t mean you are lazy or stupid or undisciplined. Most of the fat women I know are on constant diets, eating little plastic pots of steamed vegetables and rice all the time. They are always trying to lose that weight and always denying themselves. They live their lives oscillating between being hungry (because they haven’t eaten) and feeling guilty (because they have.). It’s a crappy way to live.

My advice is to get your DC a little three wheeled scooter and take them out for walks with it. You will soon be getting a good workout jogging to keep up, and feel better for the exercise and fresh air. Stop worrying about your weight and start focusing on your health instead. Being healthy is an achievable goal at any weight. Being skinny, for some of us, is not. Fight the battle you can win.

As for the class thing, I think it works the other way. The world is unkind to fat people and people (especially women) granted thinness by nature are given more and better opportunities.

Don’t be hard on yourself. Your body made that lovely child and you should be appreciating what you achieved. Treat your body well and kindly and don’t worry about returning to your pre-baby body. Your life has changed now, and this is just part of the change. Good luck to you!

@EllenMP Brilliant post!

I think I love you ellen

Drjoshuawolrich on Instagram is also good at pointing out all the bollocks that is talked and posted about diets. Really interesting.

Follow James Smith PT on instagram... I’m afraid I do agree with him though ... nobody is fat by eating little pots of rice. Behind the scenes there’s binging going on

Ellen you became fat and finally realised your body 'wants to be bigger'? I'm not sure what you mean by that?

I think there is a class and time element. TBH I know people who have one child who have more time for the gym etc as child is getting older. I found staying slim easier when my kids were little, I breast fed and walked everywhere with the buggy (at first a single and then a double). That said, I didn't eat healthily, lots of chocolate and cakes. Now the kids are older it has got harder, less time to plan meals cause I work more and they have a lot on and are fussy with food. I still walk quite a lot ((usually at least 10,000 steps a day) but have no time for formal exercise. I know I could prioritise it, but as it is I dont have time to clean the house properly etc Also as the kids have got older, life has thrown more shit at us. Unfortunately I am the type to eat more when a bit low, I also love food especially rubbish. That said I am a healthy size (size 12, 10 if lucky, 9st3 at 5ft5) and am trying to make peace with it as there is so much else to cope with.

Read her post properly WorraLiberty, that's not what she is saying.
I agree with Ellen. Torturing yourself is guaranteed to make you miserable and in many cases people put on weight.
I know someone who is constantly sturggling to lose 'the last stone'. She looks brilliant, is very fit, eats healthily etc. I just want to say would you stop! You are fine, you don't have to be pre-pregnancy skinny. But she feels she does have to be.

Yes ellen!! Beautifully put.

Unfortunately I am the type to eat more when a bit low, I also love food especially rubbish. That said I am a healthy size (size 12, 10 if lucky, 9st3 at 5ft5

I'm a little shorter than you at 5'2"...the only time I've been 9 stone was when I used to eat one meal a day. If I ate more and especially junk food, I'd have never stayed at that weight...yet you can? It really does depend on the person imo.

I don’t think everyone has the healthy capacity to be size 6 or as such, some do obviously, but everyone could be in the healthy bmi range without the body needing to be bigger couldn’t they?

Being healthy is an achievable goal at any weight

I am sorry to pick apart such a positive post, but I do not believe this statement is true. You cannot be healthy at any weight and that includes being too thin as well.

I say this as someone who had to shift over 6 stones herself. My right knee pain disappeared and my acid reflux has improved no end.

I simply was not healthy at 6 stones heavier, no matter how organic my calories were.

Eleanor she is saying her body wants to be bigger etc and that means it wants more calories in than out. She therefore seems to be looking at short term health only and not the long term strain on her heart and joints.

Being slim is largely a matter of genetic luck.

people (especially women) granted thinness by nature.

Those two statements are just risible nonsense followed by yet more excuses from the usual litany of excuses that are peddled for people being fat or overweight in order to stop any level of personal responsibility being assigned to them for their choices.

Yes there's a lot of 'bad luck' sweeping the Western world amongst men, women and children nowadays...

Worra to me Ellen is saying that her post baby body and metabolism were different to pre pregnancy ones. She exercises regularly, and stresses that she concentrates on fitness and good food
Now I focus on staying super healthy, getting lots of exercise and eating quality food. I eat when I’m hungry and don’t worry about calories, fat grams, carbs or points of any sort. But I do avoid artificial sweeteners, transfats, high fructose corn syrup, highly processed foods, etc.
How can you disagree with that? She is just saying that fighting to stay skinny is sometimes not the way to go, and she is right in my opinion.

I disagree with EllenMP's post - if you disregard calories, fat, carbs & you eat them in excess of your requirements then then you will put on weight, regardless of how healthy the food may seem to be.
You don't need to count these but you need to recalibrate mentally the normal portions. Initially, this may mean counting & weighing but then you get into the swing of knowing what you need. If the weight starts tocreep up then revert to checking your portions etc.

WorraLiberty it would seem so.
I have to stick a load of steroid foam up my bum and that is notorious for making you gain weight so I adjust my calories.

If it is genetics, how come it is a recent thing. I often watch old cheesy movies dirty dancing, mannequin, there are very few if no obese people in them.

I also disagree Ellen

Those fat women are repeat bingeing (not on rice and veg..) and dieting no wonder they don't lose weight.

I agree that you need to make peace with your body and respect it and positivity often helps on the road to becoming healthier but you cannot be "healthy at any weight" what a ridiculous statement.

Create healthy habits, stick to them, feel the results and its self motivating. You just need to break the cycle.

I lost stones and then slowly gained them back every time, plus a little more. I finally realized that my body just wants to be bigger,

I will never win a war with my own body.

Yet more excuses and abdication of responsibility, but have to say these are at least original, and I note that posters have already grabbed them with both hands. Your body does not want to work harder to do the basics, your organs don't want to work harder just to keep your body functioning, your muscles, joints and bones don't want to work harder to keep you mobile or supported.

Lots of posts here from women who get something out of punishing themselves to stay thin. ellenIs not hugely fat and there is nothing intrinsically bad about being overweight according to bmi. Even my gp said that! Obese, yes.

Michael Fast diet guy will be the next to be debunked mark my words.

lost stones and then slowly gained them back every time, plus a little more. I finally realized that my body just wants to be bigger
If you are having to lose stones at any time in your life you might not be best placed to give out nutritional advice.

Oh fgs. Loads of women think they need to lose stone +