AIBU to be annoyed?

[Trocadero]

Had conversation earlier with DH discussing what we were having for evening meal (I usually cook - as am a better cook than him & he tidies kitchen afterwards which I don't like doing!)

Then I asked him if he fancied cooking it. It was an easy enough meal and I offered to do the kitchen tidy up. He agreed, all good.

When he called me through to eat he'd done a different meal to what I'd planned!

I'm annoyed because he never said he was going to change it, otherwise I'd have cooked it so as to get what I wanted to eat.
I spend my life asking him what he wants to eat and pretty much cooking that meal, so feel a bit irritated that he thought it was ok to just change the bloody meal without mentioning it.

Yabu
He cooked, he decided what he was cooking and the deal was you clean up. You don't come across as overly happy that you do all the decision making and cooking regarding dinner anyway so enjoy the fact he's made it and decided what he's making.

You can't have your cake and eat it in this case

Maybe he fancied trying to cook something different?
I assume he's not very confident and you've probably knocked his confidence right down by having a strop over nothing! 👏

I do all our cooking, when DP does cook its sometimes shit and I pretend to enjoy it and complement him because I'm just happy he's made an effort 🤷‍♀️

Hate to throw out such a mumsnet cliche but - are you always so controlling?

I really don't think this would have bothered me.

I'm annoyed because I wanted a particular meal and when I sat down, something else arrived.

Was what he made nice?

Sounds very controlling....

The person cooking chooses what to cook, put up with it or cook yourself - unless he's cooked tripe in which case LTB.

If he'd said he was going to change the meal, I'd have said to not do mine as I wanted the meal I had in mind but he didn't even mention it.

I do kind of get it op.. if I’d really fancied eating one thing and something else showed up I’d be pretty disappointed too, especially if the meal I got was something I really wasn’t in the mood for. Unfortunately he’s your husband, you love him (presumably!) so it’s one of those little things you have to let go.

So if it's ok for him to do this, presumably it'll be ok for me to just cook whatever I want without consulting him too in future?

So you decide what you both eat when you cook AND when he cooks. That doesn't sound fair. It's good if he gets to decide now and then.

Wow sorry for you sounds seriously hard work!

And I clearly can’t type this evening

So if you want a particular meal then make it yourself.

@SallyWD, PLEASE read my OP - I said I pretty much spend all my life asking him what he wants to eat & then cooking it for him.
So, actually he DOES get consulted on what we're having...

Yes, cook what you want. My husband does the cooking and doesn’t consult me. I just eat it.

Which I would have done Nicknacky if he'd shared the info that he was going to change the meal!

Meanwhile kids are starving to death...

Chill out OP.
My DP rarely asks what's cooking if it's my turn, he's delighted to get his dinner. You sound like a spoiled brat.

Kids? DC long grown and living away from home.

Does it really matter in the scheme of things? And just cook what you want from now on or have him cook

I can kind of get where you're coming from OP.

If I really really fancied steak and chips, I'd be surprised and a bit disappointed to be faced with chicken casserole.

But once my stomach was full, I seriously don't think I could give it another thought.

I just feel that given I include him in what we're having to eat, he could afford me the same courtesy. 🙄

I really don't think Lucems meant your kids were starving to death OP