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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU not to give my children a double bed each?

529 replies

TheCherries · 16/04/2019 23:22

I am in the process of decorating new bedrooms for my two young teenagers.

Both are insistent their friends all now have double beds and it isn’t fair I am making them keep their single beds.

Changing their beds isn’t an option we don’t have the budget for it anyway but it got me thinking is it really a rite of passage to have a double bed as a teenager?

Surely you wait until you are an age to share the bed with another. My feeling is the larger the bed the more you get used to spreading out.

I would prefer to keep the single bed with guest bed underneath for sleepovers and enjoy the extra space in their rooms the rest of the time.

We have two spare bedrooms so we don’t need to double up the use of their beds for relatives staying over.

Do yours have a double bed?

OP posts:
PregnantSea · 17/04/2019 00:30

I'm really surprised at posters saying it doesn't matter what you think, it just matters what the teenagers want. Such a strange attitude. If the teenagers are so grown up and want the double bed that badly then they can pay for it, surely? Double beds and new mattresses are expensive, I certainly wouldn't fork out for one just because my teenagers said they wanted it. What if they also want new designer trainers and a car for their 17th? Do you have to pay for that too?

NaturatintGoldenChestnut · 17/04/2019 00:33

My teens and even my pre-teen all have king sized beds. By that time their single mattresses were all about 10-years-old and utterly done it (we never put them in toddler beds, they co-slept until they were each about 2.5 and then just went straight into a single), the pre-teen is very tall for his age and has ASD. DD1 is taller than I am and taller than DH is. DD2 is 4 inches taller than I am and DS is 3 inches taller than I am but has not gone anywhere near puberty yet.

If you cannot afford it then fair enough.

Floralnomad · 17/04/2019 00:35

Mine had double or king size from about 8/9 , it made sense when we were doing their rooms .

PickAChew · 17/04/2019 00:37

DS1 sprawls and appreciates the room a double gives him.

Ds2 curls up and appreciates the space a single bed gives him.

stucknoue · 17/04/2019 00:37

My dd got one at 19, it's not a necessity but when replacing I did (her bed was 15 years old!) I bought a divan with storage underneath for the ever increasing amount of stuff.

SleepingStandingUp · 17/04/2019 00:37

It's not really about what you think tbf... it's about what they want as it's their bedroom!
Nonsense.
If the DD wants a double bed with the telly that comes out of the base and a claw foot bath should OP simply say Oh course darling and take out a loan?

If you can afford to indulge their whim, awesome. But that's a choice not an obligation. The obligation is a decent bed in a decent room in a decent house.

SummerPlace · 17/04/2019 00:55

@brizzlemint: A king single bed has dimensions of 106 cm x 203 cm / (42″ x 80″).
So, slightly narrower than a small double, but 15cms longer and wider than a traditional single bed. I went from a double - just for me - to one of these and found it excellent. The extra length was particularly nice.

However, on googling it, that size may not be available in the UK. I live in Australia.

Ihatehashtags · 17/04/2019 01:15

I bought my kids doubles because I knew this would come up when they were older.

Thesnobbymiddleclassone · 17/04/2019 01:20

I had a single bed at my parents and my room there still does! That was just my bed.

Tumbleweed101 · 17/04/2019 06:47

The bedrooms in my house aren’t big enough for any of us to have double beds lol.

Pascha · 17/04/2019 06:54

Ds2 is only 6 but heading for very tall so will benefit from a double bed as he grows up.

Unfortunately for him his bedroom isn't wide enough so he will have to put up with a single til he moves out. He'll cope. He'll have to.

Soontobe60 · 17/04/2019 07:00

Since when did the children in a household get to demand specific furniture? My DDs always got to choose the decor when it was time to decorate, but I wouldn't even have considered asking them what size bed they wanted!
My house, my money, my bed choice!

speakout · 17/04/2019 07:02

My kids had double beds around 15.
Much nicer for sprawing, doing homework etc.

We are a family of 5 adults ande we all have a double bed each.

Beansandcoffee · 17/04/2019 07:03

MN isn’t the real world. My two teenager’s bedrooms are too small for double beds - lots of kids have to share rooms.. All I can say is that everyone must have big houses on this post.

GrandmasNightie · 17/04/2019 07:05

I’m in my 40s and had a double bed when I was 15. My ds19 has a double in his tiny room at home but a single at uni. Dd14 is getting a double bed next week as I am decorating her room.

GrandmasNightie · 17/04/2019 07:08

I don’t have a big house. Ds19 has the same size bedroom as me and we have squeezed a double in plus a chest of drawers. No room for anything else but only sleep in there so it’s fine. My other 3dc have the slightly bigger 2 rooms because they play and hangout in theirs.

Ragwort · 17/04/2019 07:09

My DS has been asking for a double bed for a few years (it would be a Christmas or birthday present if we decided to get him one - his room does have the space). We have made it quite clear that when he starts looking after his room & it doesn’t look like a pit we will consider it ... he is now 18 and his room is still a complete mess, so no double bed Grin.

LawnsLT · 17/04/2019 07:09

Double bed for my 4 year old, have had for 2 years now BUT he is a terrible sleeper and me or my DP couldn’t handle the single bed any longer Grin

DustOffYourHighestHopes · 17/04/2019 07:10

I’d rather my children had single beds and that creates room for a large desk and comfortable chair.

Shutuptodd · 17/04/2019 07:10

My dd is 14 and only has a single and will until she leaves home as her room can only fit a single and a wardrobe.

My 2 ds' will be the same as they share a room.

I didn't have a single bed until I was 22 and before that I shared a room with my sister.

ooooohbetty · 17/04/2019 07:16

Mine never had them. It wouldn't mattered if they said all their friends had them (and some did) they still wouldn't have had one. No need.

Petalflowers · 17/04/2019 07:17

I didn’t know having a double bed was a rite of passage for teens. My dcs, both six footers, both have single beds.

EggysMom · 17/04/2019 07:17

All I can say is that everyone must have big houses on this post. Well, the OP starts this with two teenagers in rooms big enough to consider double beds, and two spare rooms which already have double beds. I grew up in a 3bed semi where I got the smallest room, barely big enough for a single bed plus wardrobe and drawers, not even room for a desk for homework. And that was spacious compared to my friend who was in a 2-up 2-down, she shared a bedroom.

ooooohbetty · 17/04/2019 07:17

My son was well over six foot so I got him a longer length single.

Thepacksurvives · 17/04/2019 07:20

I bought my own double bed aged 16, I was disappointed my mum wouldn't buy me one, all my friends had them from early teens.

My daughters have double beds. Elder is 4yo. Younger is 10m and in a cot but from that she'll go into a double. We have large enough bedrooms for double beds and plenty of play space.

It's worked out well as recently when we had guests dd1 was more then happy to go into the baby's room and the guests had a double to share and dd1 says she can't wait to sneak in and share with her sister sometimes when she's bigger

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