Child neglect or something normal?

[MonaLisaDoesntSmile]

Not a party here, just something I noticed and wandered people's opinions.

So, when I went shopping today to a local to a local supermarket , as I went in I noticed a child (5-6 years old?) with a big shopping bag and an older lady talking to the child. I assumed they were together. At the tills the same old lady was agitated, complaining to the casshier and waving a phone around, saying she was about to call social services or whatever. Turned out the child was in the supermarket on their own, doing weekly shopping (the bag did look quite big and heavy), and apprently told the lady they lived a block or two away, and that their mother sent them to pick a couple of things. For the reference, I live in a city. The lady thought it was unresponsible of the mother to send child shopping unaccompanied when it's dangerous, they could get kidpanned or whatever, plus they had to carry the heavy bag on their own. But by the time she got the phone, the kid took the shopping they paid for and left and she was unhappy the supermarket staff did not think it approoprate to have alerted someone about it. The casshier was saying she saw the same kid shopping before on their own as well, but she deemed it normal.

That got me thinking- I was brought up in a large city myself, used to go back to school and come back on my own, there was nothing unusual with kids going shopping without parents (admittedly to pick a couple of things parents may have forgotten, not a weekly shop!), we spent a lot more time unsupervised in the play area. I do get things get more dangerous, plus there is an issue of how much the kid had to carry.

What is everyone's verdict- was the lady overreacting, or should it be something that would worry you?

If the child is too young to be left at home alone then they are too young to be on manoeuvres alone outside the home IMO. What would people say to a 5 year old being left at home while the mother went to the shops?

www.citylab.com/transportation/2015/09/why-are-little-kids-in-japan-so-independent/407590/

I used to live and work in Japan. I was sexually assaulted twice (both times walking home from work in the daylight), and while I was there was also the time that a backpacker was found chopped up in a bath of acid (or something like that, can't remember the full story!). There is an over sexualization of children (especially school girls), cigarettes and alcohol available in vending machines on every street corner, and a huge appetite for porn (porn mags available in vending machines etc..).

Don't get me wrong, I love Japan. Really I do. I almost stayed there as it is an amazing country. It has many pluses. But would I let my kid travel around on their own out there - no way!!! And plenty of my Japanese friends out there were also of the same opinion. Just because they do things as they do, doesn't mean it's wise or we should follow.

And by the way ... I'd didn't see any little 5 year old Japanese children shopping in a supermarket on their own. None of my Japanese friends would have thought that was ok either. .....

www.aljazeera.com/indepth/features/2017/03/sexual-assault-japan-girl-victim-170307101413024.html

www.nippon.com/en/nipponblog/m00096/the-tightly-regulated-independence-of-japanese-children.html

User, I also lived in Japan at that time. I lived there 8 yrs, working in an all Japanese company and lived with a Japanese man. Crime there of any sort is rare and nearly always of the sick variety. For the number of people in Japan, it’s incredibly low and opportunistic crime is so so rare. I’ve personal experience of my designer wallet being left on a wall at the entrance of a busy station for 10 hours waiting for me to come back and get it. Not a coin taken from it. 10,000 people must have passed within 30cm of it. Anyway back to the point. Many of my colleagues had 6-7-8 yr olds taking multiple trains alone to school. They certainly would pick up food in the conveni on the way home so that’s shopping no? My direct report told me one day her 5 yr old twins went home alone after school and waited the 5 hrs for her alone every day. I was horrified. They would make a simple meal and play and wait apparently😲

@happyspud - that tends to be most people’s experience of Japan / S Korea. It can be considered very normal (depending on the area) for a 5-6 yo child to wait in a shop or cafe after school for their parents to finish work. The shopkeeper will often keep an eye, keep them fed, even help with homework, then charge the parent the bill when they come to pick them up.

You see it in London too: a lot of 6-7 yos travel unaccompanied along my commuter route at 7-730 to go to school. Mostly private school set.

The 5/6 year old child can be anything from 2-4 years older. My DSD until recently was very small for her age so she was the size of a child 3 years younger.

So the kid is probably 10/11 and that is perfectly fine to go shopping on their own.

Year 5 so she’s 9/10 is fine to pop to the corner shop to get a couple of bits (assuming less than 10 mins away and no busy roads)
Aged 5/6 is too young to be unsupervised anywhere and especially not to do a weekly shop.
I’m amazed her parents don’t end up eating mini rolls and harribo all week. Can a child of that age even read a shopping list?

Do watch the film posted above of the little Japanese boy sent out on an errand by his mum, along with his little sister. He quite distressed to start off with (she is completely calm and comforts him) but ends up having fun and completing the task he has been set with the help of shop staff.

Children walk to school on their own at around 6 in Switzerland