To ask what weird/stupid stuff you did as a kid

[Bantameggs]

I think I was a bit of a strange child although maybe I’m not the only one.

One of my favourite things to do aged about 5/6 was to steal a bar of soap and some scissors, find a corner to hide in and shave wafer thin slices of soap off until there was nothing but a big pile of soap flakes. I got into trouble every time but it didn’t stop me.

Our family car had two rear facing seats at the back and if I was sitting there I used sit dead still and make blank-faced unblinking eye contact with the people behind for as long as possible. I think I managed it for about an hour once.

Once aged about 10 I set out to drink as much water as possible just to see how much I could drink. I managed a few litres (I’m aware now that I could have killed myself)

I brought a large dehydrated dead fish I’d found on the beach to show and tell at school when I was 7. Unfortunately it was the last day before the summer holidays and I accidentally left it behind. I think they had to get someone to come in in the end to deal with the terrible smell.

When I was 12 I coloured my entire face in with bright pink lipstick. It took about two days to get rid of completely.

Was anyone else a little weirdo? I think I’m pretty normal now btw!

My dd coloured in her face with lipstick when she was about 12 too.

I used to eat as many fruit gums as possible purely to get the sensation of all my teeth being stuck together

I was thirsty at the seaside, so I took a straw to the sea and started drinking.

This gave me a good laugh! Bet you regretted that quickly!

When I was about 9 I wrote 'count' on my bedroom wall with black marker pen. It wasnt massive but was noticeable. I've no idea why I did it. I didnt usually do things like that I was quite well behaved at that age. I instantly regretted it and tried to cover it up by pouring nail varnish over it but the nail varnish wasnt thick enough and the writing sort of soaked through it and could still plainly be seen.
It was an awful mess. In the end I just had to go and tell my mother.
Looking back it was quite hilarious. I just quietly said 'I wrote CUNT on my wall in black marker pen and I dont know why' my mum just looked really confused. She came to have a look and said wed leave the nail varnish to dry and then just paint over it in the morning as she still had some of the paint for that wall in the cellar.
She didnt even tell me off (which was odd because she was usually quite strict) I think she was just so confused she wasnt able to be angry!!!

Haha *CUNT not count... stupid polite spellcheck!!

Left some spaghetti in a tray of water under my bed very often for 'the man who lived there'. Creeps me out a bit now.

Oh I used to (when front facing) in the car pretend I had an imaginary razor sharp scythe-like thing sticking out of the car that would effortlessly slice through everything we passed - hedges, bus stops etc. I sometimes do it now, it’s oddly satisfying

I used to walk around the house with a round vanity mirror and look on it while it faced the ceiling and pretend I was walking on the ceiling. I also used to take all the clothes out of them ottoman and pretend it was a coffin and I was a vampire and sleep in there. I also used to play in a big cardboard box and pretend it was a rocket, even though I had an actual rocket tent. I was an only child, so I guess I had to make my own weird fun! 😂

I used to go hunting for roadkill and then crush it under a giant rock in the garden.

After I said something I'd keep repeating it back to myself in my head to see if it sounded stupid. Except I ended up moving my lips and my siblings would take the piss. I still do it but don't move my lips anymore. Most of the time.

OP I did the same thing with the scythe thing in the car, except it was attached (in my imagination) to my hips, so tensing either bum cheek would raise the scythe and spare other cars from a terrible fate.

Pulled out eyelashes each night and collected them in a secret pile behind the curtain on my windowsill.

Played with pennies as if they were children in a school and I was the teacher.

I used to tie carrier bags around my feet and 'ice skate' on the carpet...great fun!

Also discovered that spraying perfume into a lit candle doesn't make a scented candle

I used to sit down the side of the sofe hiding from everyone to 'pick my bits' which was the bits of fluff between my toes from my socks.

I remember sneaking downstairs at night a few times to peel the dry outer part of onions around the age of 5/6.

I used to squeeze shampoo bottles into the sink until that were empty.

I once gathered as many ants as I could and put them in into my polly pocket. I remember this happening cause I was dreaming of how cool it would be to shrink down small enough to live in my polly pockets and figured it I couldn't enjoy it to it's full potential, maybe the ants would?

The next time I opened it up, they'd all died.

I used to tuck ALL of my teddy and dolls in the bed with me in case they felt left out. It would be very uncomfortable and I would have little room to move!

Used to get a roll of 2ply toilet paper and pull the pieces apart and make a pile...I have no idea why...

Used to make up songs sat on the toilet.

Used to make a picnic in the picnic box with my friend, walk around the garden a few times then settle down for lunch.

Had a little hamster that if you pulled the string it vibrated.... leave the rest to imagination.

Used to set myself up in a pretend office with a keyboard, phone, stationery and leaflets and run my business....

When reading stories to myself read them like I was a teacher and child at school.

Cut up loads and loads of paper just to make miles of paper chains for no reason at all.

When I was about 5 I hid some tinfoil in my coat pocket and when I got to school I put it on my teeth and pretended I had braces

At my first dance lesson aged 3 we sat in a circle and went round announcing our names. I said mine was Snow White and kept it up the whole lesson even though everybody knew I was lying.

I would shake the earwigs out of my Mums friends rose bush and hit them with a hammer.

We had a slim tall cupboard in our bathroom behind the door. I would hide in the laundry basket and wait what seemed like hours for somebody to come to the toilet, let them start their business and jump out on them.

I once made a ‘cigarette’ from rolled up paper and tried to smoke it behind the trees in our garden.

I used to try and make pasta by filling up a cup of boiled water and putting the pasta in to soak. It was still hard and I still ate it.

I cant imagine my kids doing any of these things

This is going to make me sound like a weirdo 🤪
When there was something in the microwave I used to countdown faster than the timer.

I used to set the timer on the oven to 5 mins and see how many times I could run around the house?!

Me and my brother used to fill the bathroom sink with cold water and try and drink it all like dogs.

We used to pour water and washing up liquid on the kitchen floor and slip around on the lino.

When we were in the car coming home from somewhere and about 5 miles from home, I used to close my eyes really tight and see if I could work out where I was.

Everytime i went under a bridge in the car I would have to duck. (I still do sometimes, DH thinks I'm odd)

There is probably lots more 😮

When my sister and I were 8-10 ish and supposed to be having a bath we’d let all the water out and then cover the bath in soap and go “ice skating”
How we didn’t break a bone is beyond me

Used to put 2 wood lice together and try and make them make babies

We were getting an extension at the same time as having the bathroom re done and the new toilet was being kept in what was going to be my new room. My sister and i would take it in turns to sit on it and pretend to go for a wee
They also kept the new carpet rolled up across the floor in there and we used that for jumping imaginary horses over

This is hard to explain but I used to tap out the syllables from words in a sentence that someone had said using my teeth sort of clicking them side to side (with my mouth shut). Also would do the same copying the pattern of footsteps when walking. Don't know if that even makes sense!

I used to eat raisins and pretend they were drugs with resulting waving of arms and staggering about.

I was obsessed with swimming pools and spent hours looking at holiday brochures to look at the best pools. I preferred pools with some kind of bridge feature.

I really wanted a dog and used to walk around the supermarket with a real dog lead talking to my imaginary dog.

I used to like visiting bathroom showrooms in the hope of finding a bath with water in it. I swear I found one once which started my obsession.

@bobstersmum That makes complete sense...I still do it Usually spelling out my name or dance steps or songs!

I loved doing science experiments from books, especially those for which I had to be blindfolded. My favourite ones were testing if I could point in the direction of someone clapping; tasting the difference between apple and raw potato (while holding my nose); being poked with two pencils or one on different parts of my body; and if I could identify by smell whose clothes were whose. I kid you not - this was in a book, explaining about pheromones! I really wanted someone to drive me somewhere to find out if I could point to where home was (to test my magnetic orientation), but nobody would agree to this!

Ate toilet roll.

Once drank as much as I possibly could in an attempt to see if it was possible to wee so much the toilet would fill right up.

Once covered my face in lip balm then, out walking with my mum, proceeded to go on and on about how I couldn't even feel the wind on my face, as though I was in an advert for this amazing new product (lip balm face shield). Until my mum told me to be quiet.

@bunchofballoons, Thank goodness its not just me! I don't consciously do it now but I think maybe I do without realising!

@theonewiththecat

I used to lap up milk from a saucer like my cat.

I also would shut my eyes to see if I know where I am.... I still do (just not when driving)

Also used to cut out circles of bread and do communion with my friend...

Oh something else I did.
I used to paint my brothers face with crayola poster paint. (He was fine with it btw)

@Theonewiththecat I love the one of you closing your eyes and seeing if you could work out where you were! As a child I loved the moment of recognising where I was, when coming home in the car; and the sheer joy of memorising a complete journey. As an adult I've asked my DH to blindfold me and take me somewhere in town, then allow me to see, and leave me there so I can walk about, and see how long it is before I work out where I am.

@Quandary2018 When a new bath was lying on its side in our landing, I used to sit in it, reading.