To sell up and move to Spain ?

[MijasMaddie]

Hi MN’s!

I’ve nc! So in a nutshell.. I’ve got two DC (sons) 8yrs and 10yrs. DH is 13 years older than me. (I’m mid thirties he’s late 40s)

He works in financial sales and I’m a small business owner (pet care/boarding).

We have a home in a lovely place on the outskirts of London. BUT we are struggling to live!

My DH has unfortunately been out of work/made redundant SO many times! We’ve been together 13 years and it seems every 2/3 years he is out of work.

A couple of years ago he had to ‘leave’ instead of being pushed and was out of work nearly a whole year! This has put us in such a bad financial situation.

We now pay the mortgage and the bills but we have hardly anything to live on. The mortgage and outgoings are huge.

Credit cards maxed out. I’m in touch with debt companies etc only so much can be done!

Life is a hamster wheel and borrowing from Peter to pay Paul etc..

AIBU to sell up and move to Spain? We attended Spanish lessons (myself, DH, DC) but stopped a couple of years ago! So we are no way fluent!

I have no money nor does DH but we have money in our home. After selling our home we could have enough to buy a three bed apartment in Southern Spain (ideally Calahonda area).

DH is saying he’ll have to stay here and rent a room outskirts of London to work his job in the city etc.

I could get rid of my debts and this misarable life but I will also have burnt all bridges to ever be able to come back.

My youngest is 8 and a young sweet 8. He’d be happy and make friends anywhere. But my eldest is 10 going on Kevin the Teenager! I’d have to put them through Spanish state school (also thinking of doing Cambridge p/t home school modules) if he hated it then he’ll hate me!!

Pros - I’d have the debts and financial burdens weighing me down gone. I’d be living in a sunny climate.
I am qualified in beauty industry, massage, animal pet training care..

Cons- what if it all goes wrong?

I’ve wanted to move to Southern Spain since 2013. I love it there. I fully appreciate living there is different to a holiday.

Only other option is to sell this house and rent there for a year (?)

Are kids that are about to turn 9 and 11 too old to be put in a Spanish state school?

I cannot go on like this 😑 too over drawn too broke. Don’t know how I’ll afford food for this week!

The thought of selling up and being able to buy a spacious penthouse in Spain has never been so tempting.

Ps. I have experience in beauty, make up, massage in case you wondered what I’d do over there. Also a very experienced animal carer.

• also Brexit is a factor but as it stands I know I can still go there ...

Please give me some advice (shake some sense into me!) thank you! X

I won't be job hunting when I emigrate. I'll sell my house and buy an apartment worth half as much and live off my meagre pension which will I hope go at least as far in the south of Spain as it does in Dublin.

I would move to somewhere with a high percentage of English speakers even though I speak Spanish. I'd want the option of mixing in to Spanish culture as well as the ease of just showing up for a random bridge class if I felt like it.

My advice was to the OP. Obviously if you are an EU passport holder with a pension and savings then that's a different kettle of fish to the OP, who needs to either have a job or enough money in the bank + private healthcare and who from October (or earlier) may no longer be European and so will not have FOM and will face more stringent requirements for residency.

Golon I’m currently applying for an EU passport. I don’t know why you’re assuming that I definitely won’t have FOM

Maddie - Golondria has given you loads of really constructive, practical advice. You are wedded to this escape dream but as it stands it won't work. Something needs to change to make this work - you need to learn the language, build up savings, work out what it is your DH actually does for a job and do some practical research - not fantasy

Buena suerte pero tienes que pensar con tu cerebro no tu corazón

OP - you may still have FOM but you will still need to meet the residency requirements - as do all other EU nationals. There is no way round that as Golandrina has said. Can you meet those requirements?

Sandwich - right now can or could I meet those requirements? Probably not 😔

every single post I've made today has typos in it - am smh in annoyance and shame

Myrtle - I know you’re right. So hard though when your heart loves something.

Oh absolutely but it depends a lot on what makes you happy I think. I am happy living a very simple life and don't need the ego validation of a high income or the intellectual stimulation of a challenging job! I'm making myself sound great here! :-p

But a simple life in a hotter country would suit me better than the life I have here, locked in to living in an expensive part of Dublin for schools and kids. I'm single and as I age I realise that I"m quite isolated in real terms anyway. Nobody contacts me. Nobody includes me or invites me to dinner parties. I can do shit on my own, just in a different location.

Op, i recommend watching a lot of spanish series on netflix. Cable girls is good clear spanish, very easy to understand. Lots on there.
Sometimes I watch things like crazy ex girlfriend with subtitles in spanish because the language is very contemporary and it's nearly 30 years since I last lived in spain.

I'm not assuming you won't have FOM, I'm saying to the other person who is Irish that her situation (and who will have savings and a pension) is different to yours.

To the OP my point is that it seems she can't meet the requirements to get a NIE, in which case she can't move to Spain to live. It's as simple as that. The rest is academic.

So it really does sound like your first step needs to be to get yourself in a position where you could which as others have said, means sorting out your husband!!

Years ago many people would move out here and got away with being unregistered - those days are long gone. You need the official paperwork for everything now and (certainly in this area) there have been people who have had a visit from the local police and told to get their papers in order pretty damn quick.

I get it Completely!

What about Ireland OP, not Dublin janey mackers no way but somewhere on the west coast of Ireland, where houses cost about a quarter of what they do in Dublin and I"m sure England. You'd need to get a pps number too but that'd be more easily navigated through your own language!

I sometimes think if I don't go to spain if I decide I'm brave enough I'll go to Sligo or Westport

I live in La Cala so just down the road from Calahonda. I think the children would settle ok. You'd have 2 years before the eldest started secondary school at least which would give the opportunity to pick the language in primary school which would be easier.
It's not easy though and besides the apartment purchase you would definitely be needing a safety blanket.
Did you say your business is pet care? I don't think that would work in an apartment. Would you consider inland a bit and buy a finca with a bit of land?

Sandwich and Golon thank you so much today for all your helpful advice 😊

Selkirk- we sound very similar in our hopes and wishes and how we’d be fine loving a simpler life as long as we could do it in the sunshine ☀️ ps. My nanny and grandad were from Westport! Lovely part of the world!

Headinthecloud- wow! La Cala. Love it there as well as calahonda and Riveria Del Dol. Do you have children? I’m assuming you’re a long term resident etc? Love to know how you did it. Thank you for your reply! And I did think about the pet business over there. Seems catch 22 sometimes. Employers don’t offer jobs unless you’re a resident then you hear advice that it’s best to get a job before you’re a resident.

Thank you everyone again x

Employers don’t offer jobs unless you’re a resident then you hear advice that it’s best to get a job before you’re a resident. Either you need enough money to support yourself or you need a job, without one of those two things you won't get a NIE and residency so won't be able to stay more than 3 months.
So, you need funds or you need a job. The most common ways to do this are a job teaching English as they often recruit English speakers from abroad, or your employer sends you there.
How did other people do it? Well, they were either travelling spouses or people who had jobs or funds or came with a job (probably TEFL teaching) or had the funds (maybe EU pensioners). That's pretty much it.
There isn't a way round that.

Yes I've got 2 children. Aged 2 and 13. I've been here for 15 years. I'm also half Spanish although British citizen.
The main thing is getting your paperwork in order. NIE and residencia are massively important for you to be able to work over here.

NIE and residencia are massively important for you to be able to work over here. Totally agree, without them you basically can't do anything: work, sign rental agreements, buy a house, get healthcare, connect to services and utilities...

Following - I feel similar!

Hi Jennifer! Lovely to see it’s not just me 😁☀️

We moved to Portugal nearly 16 years ago, with no plan, but with the proceeds of selling our house and business plus we already owned a holiday rental property in the village. Significantly, we don’t have any children

We have seen so many people come and go, some after a year or two having lost everything they came with and I would say, don’t do it, especially with Brexit and especially Spain which has economic and employment problems (as has Portugal!). It is hard to get work here, especially in winter, the sun doesn’t shine every day and the temperatures can really drop from November to March

We have been lucky, my husband started his own business, which thrived, and I expanded my property rentals and management business. We are both cutting back now, and we are looking at early retirement here. I have applied for citizenship, Portugal allows dual citizenship, I don’t believe Spain does

Costa- wow that sounds amazing. I know you must have worked very hard but that’s amazing that you made it work!
Love Portugal! I find it even friendlier than Spain! X

I've been in a similar situation as you OP. Lots of debt and working just to live but getting no where. I would believe anything, I looked seriously into all sorts of multi level marketing and pyramid selling, I was so desperate I believed the sales spiel. Luckily I didn't sink loads of money into them but a wasted so much time dreaming! Luckily I have a very down to earth DH. I really didn't want to be told that I hadn't looked at any of it realistically, having my dreams squashed was really bad but I had to come to realise that it just wasn't going to work. It's great to have long term goals and if that is living I another country then great but go when you can afford to not now.
I know you are thinking of your children and how good the education system is in Spain but what are they actually going to do with the rest of their lives ? How can you be sure you are doing the right thing for their futures by taking them to a country with 30% unemployment.
I now live 30 miles from Edinburgh and it's certainly nothing like the South of Cambs. or any commuter town I have lived in. It is so friendly and has a great family vibe. Edinburgh is second to London in finance and banking so I would be very surprised if your DH couldn't get a job here.

A couple of poster mentioned making a plan with, say, a 5 year vision.

I moved to Spain when I was in my 20s - single and no children. I didn’t last long, because I had basic Spanish and could only do seasonal, low paid work (I couldn’t drive then either). I knew that, one day, I would like the option to return. I worked out what job I could do in the UK and in Spain and trained for that (this took several years - I’m a fully qualified teacher).

15 Years later, I rejigged some of my finances as I am now married and had a small inheritance. We bought a house in Spain in a different area to the one I used to live in as it is cheaper. Even though I have my ‘ducks in a row’, I am still hesitating to take the plunge as I know how difficult it is. I come over regularly but still have my job in England. Just to add: I have a lot of friends on Costa Del Sol. From the outside, it looks like they live a charmed life, but it is bloody hard work! The easy money in real estate has long since gone.

Where my home is (Alicante), many people start up their own businesses serving the immigrant communities from the UK etc. Things like dog grooming, beauty will enable you to work, but it is not easy.

Move to somewhere cheaper in the UK, learn the language, work out exactly what job / business you will, focus on or train up to, do your research.