AIBU- how do you treat men trying it on?

[wwydoo]

A week ago I was staying at a hotel in Manchester with my boyfriend, we woke up thirsty so I went to Tesco Express to fetch some things. Whilst sitting on a bench waiting for it to open a guy approached me. He extended his hand out for a handshake but I refused it and was called a "fucking bitch". I felt safe as there were plenty of people around.

I always just ignore random men on the street, even if they are just saying "hello". I was discussing this with friends over dinner and was genuinely surprised that a couple of them said they do engage to avoid "escalation". Not the approach I have AT ALL.

AIBU what you do?

I don't always assume that men are trying it in with me - so if someone is just saying hello or something I will say it back and be friendly. But if they are obviously trying it on then i tend to just go blank and ignore them. If I have headphones with me then I use those.

I never make eye contact on the street/ on my commute, but if a man ever does approach me I wear a completely uninterested expression and say 'no thanks' in a flat voice then turn/ walk away, the same as I do for Chuggers. Men who approach women on the street are basically sex chuggers.

You're totally right they are sex chuggers
Urghh

A total stranger pretending to be your friend in order to extract something from you.....

You know that bit in the Muppet Christmas Carol when Michael Caine sweeps past with such hauteur small animals scatter?

That's me, that is.

I can categorically say Ihave never been approached by a stranger who is a woman in the way that I am approached by-a man who is a stranger. So categorically I can say Not All Women, not a one has tried to engage with me in an inappropriate setting as I go about my business, abused me for not engaging, followed me or worse.
Women who have chatted me up have always been in places you would expect it-pub/club etc.
If only there was some way we could tell which ones were going to be creepy, or turn on us, get angry, shout abuse, follow us, before we spoke to them! In my experience it covers old men, young men, men of many ethnicities, big men, small men, men at work, men in uniforms, men in vehicles, men on public transport.....Of course I don’t mind speaking to the nice ones, which ones are they? Any ideas Benjimoon?

Tilikum sex chuggers! Take the rest of the day off, that’s 😂 hilarious

This is the only part of growing old that improves. Now 62, and people talk to you like another human. Young people don't think you are always past it, (but aren't interested in you... just being polite) and you are not a sexual target; you can be an object of romantic interest again, but not based on physical attributes. I enjoy walking around my area and feeling comfortable to greet everyone I see with a cheerful good morning, without wondering if I'm inadvertently chatting someone up.

As a man I think I understand the perspectives being given above to the extent a man could anyway.

I sometimes get the bus to work and during the winter nights it’s usually dark when I get off back in my home town. On one occasion I was inadvertently following a young lady back towards home on foot just the two of us.

I didn’t know what to do, I wanted to accelerate to get past her but knew this could be misconstrued. But staying behind her must have been awful too.

In the end I FaceTimed my toddler for a chat, I have no idea if this helps disarm the situation

The point is that yes, to a stranger I could be a rapist and it’s not offensive to take that stance.