How long before family/friends met your DC?

[mcjx]

Starting to somewhat "plan" the birth of my DS which will be happening in the next 3 weeks or so.

MIL seems quite insistent on being there as soon as I've given birth. I don't want this to happen, as skin to skin with my baby and alone time with just him and my partner at first is really what I want. I'm very keen on breastfeeding and understand that s2s is important in the first few hours is important.

I've only just recently made the decision that I want my mum to be present at the birth, never mind having MIL there too not long after. She's quite interfering and loud, although we do have quite a good relationship and I don't want to hurt her feelings by asking can she wait until we feel ready before she visits.

Am I BU and unfair seeing as my own mum will be there? How long was it for you before you had visitors? I'm a FTM so I don't know how to deal with all this

Birth was just me and dh - well, and what felt like a million and one hospital staff! DD was born in the evening.

First visitors came the next day to the hospital - my parents and also MIL came too (FIL was in hospital so couldn't) during visiting hours. My parents came day after too, and bought my sister (late teens at time) on day 3 who actually ended up coming home in car with us as I was released whilst she was there.
FIL saw dd on day 5 after he came out of hospital.

But we saw people most days just for an hour to two. My mum visited almost every day for much longer periods of time to help out as I had a c section and couldn't do much initially. Meant dh could go back to work some times and spread his time off with us over a longer period.
First overnight guests were probably after about 6 weeks.

These threads always make me really sad. I have a DS and (according to MN) I'll always play second fiddle to my future DILs family. No matter how nice I am, or how much I do, I'll never be equal to DILs mum in my son's family unit's eyes.
I know it's a long way in the future, but I'd be so excited when DS is about to become a dad, and so hurt if I was told that other grandma is allowed to meet her grandchild but I'm not because it would be stressful

Ask MIL to wait until the next day, any longer would be unreasonable. DGC is as much hers GC as your DMs.
You'll probably be on a great buzz after the birth for a few days, wait and see how the birth goes.
I had visitors more or less the next day on DD, same day on DS which was shit, I got home DBro SIL and kids waiting in the garden for me, they stayed hours.

@Biancadelrioisback it just depends on the relationship. I adore my MIL she is a nuisance too but she is a fab one. I have no relationship with my mum and honestly I'm so glad of her.

I think you should let Mil visit soon after the baby is born especially if your Mum is going to be at the birth. She will want to see her new grandchild too.
But she doesn't need to stay long and obviously it should be when you are feeling well. So it will depend on the birth. It shouldn't affect breast feeding or skin to skin. Are you worried about feeding while she is there?
An hour or so after he is born is reasonable I think.

I just wanted me and DH. I thought it was our last time just to two of us and I wanted it to be just us with our baby to bond as a family. And honestly I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Don’t let anyone guilt you into something you don’t want. Only two of you there when you made the baby so only really two of you need to be there when s/he arrives.

Also I’ve not read all the comments so apologies if someone has already posted this but it’s worth a read. So many woman didn’t expect the crazy that babies can bring!

community.babycenter.com/post/a25798437/the_best_of_delivery_room_dramas