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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

My sister is faking her pregnancy.

477 replies

Norrisskipjack · 08/04/2019 17:57

Trigger warning in advance I’ll need to speak about baby loss to give context on this one.

I have 2 sisters: A and B.

3 months ago, B’s beautiful little girl Matilda was stillborn at 38 weeks. About 2 weeks after, our sister A announced she was 6 weeks pregnant and for the whole family, it was a very bitter sweet time as you can imagine.

The announcement was a shock for 2 reasons: A is in a bisexual but in a gay relationship and her and her girlfriend have been together a couple of years. Her girlfriend is adamant and always has been that she doesn’t want children.

B was bloody heroic throughout and managed to react excitedly on our WhatsApp when A talked about baby stuff and supported her when A was complaining how bad morning sickness was etc.

A was spectacularly tactless to the point that in the end I called A and explained while I knew how excited she was, she needed to tone it down in the group chat and maybe just message me without B in the chat if there’s things she’s excited about since A would be hurting despite putting on a really brave face.

A went ballistic at me and accused me of jealousy Hmm then stopped talking to me but continued to message B with giddy excited pregnancy chat Sad

None of us live near each other but we meet up fairly regularly normally. A hasn’t come to any of our meet ups since announcing the pregnancy because she says she doesn’t want to be around me and doesn’t want ‘her bump’ to upset B. Fair enough.

Anyway fast forward to now: I ran in to A’s girlfriend completely by chance on Saturday at an event and did the usual big hello hugs and fuss. I mentioned in passing how excited she must be for the impending arrival and how A must be getting quite big now, but she had NO IDEA what I was talking about.

I don’t know why, but I’d suspected something wasn’t quite right by what A had said before she blocked me so GF’s confusion kind of just confirmed what I already knew. I told GF that A had told us she was pregnant and GF confirmed this was catagorically not true. They live together so I can’t imagine she’d not know.

Anyway, 2 days later A unblocked me and had a WhatsApp rant about me ‘sticking my nose in’. Meanwhile I’d told B what had happened and she confirmed she also suspected the pregnancy wasn’t real.

I haven’t yet responded to the Facebook rant and A during her rant hasn’t confirmed or denied that the pregnancy is fake.

I want to cut her off and not respond but B is keen to understand exactly what’s gone on and why. We haven’t fallen out over it, but we’ve had major disagreements on how to proceed.

WIBU to just cut off A and not engage with the crazy and encourage my sister to do the same, or should we be trying to u defat and what’s actually going on?

I’m 100% sure there is no pregnancy.

OP posts:
MCC85 · 11/04/2019 05:41

Sorry Lovely, but the press have found your post......www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/woman-accuses-sister-faking-pregnancy-14273739?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=mirror_main

I have no advice, but sending my thoughts to B and her beautiful little girl.

I hope you get some answers in respect of A.

X

TildaTurnip · 11/04/2019 08:23

The Mirror have lifted this and are absolutely vile for doing so.

LagunaBubbles · 11/04/2019 08:50

The family's main concern now should be for your sister A's mental health

And that's why she does what she does, knows she will get the attention and drama she wants. Bit like bullies and victims of bullying you see on here, some posters always seem more sympathetic to the poor bullies than the victims.

gertrudejekyll02 · 11/04/2019 09:04

That's cracking journalism - lifting it all from Mumsnet!

Whoops75 · 11/04/2019 09:14

Shame on that paperAngry

teyem · 11/04/2019 09:19

Mumsnet is just cheap copy for failed journalists.

Cheby · 11/04/2019 09:41

This is disgusting, the ‘journalist’ should be utterly ashamed of themselves. Jesus, how can they look at themselves every day knowing this is what they do to make a living?

Playmytune · 11/04/2019 09:49

Feel so sorry for your dsB. It must’ve have been awful for her when A announced her pregnancy so soon after she lost Matilda. She is one special person, as are you.
Hope your news is good and you’re family have a real baby, instead of A’s pretend one, on the way.

ohfourfoxache · 11/04/2019 09:51

Wow. That “journalist” really is a special kind of cunt.

cuspish · 11/04/2019 09:53

absolutely horribly that the mirror have used this story. What utter bastards.

Contraceptionismyfriend · 11/04/2019 10:09

I think the worst thing you could do is reach out to her. She will be waiting. She didn't miscarry. She is a spoilt horrible little birch who will keep being vile until you all stop feeding her the attention she craves. Ignore her. If your mum wants to contact her let her. But let her wallow in her self pity.

DelilahTheSlagFromTheBible · 11/04/2019 10:15

Fuck off Daily Mirror, you shower of twats.

Apologies, OP.

PurpleDaisies · 11/04/2019 10:18

I asked the op if she was worried about this turning up in the daily mail back on p2. The op said no, she wasn’t worried about sparing A’s blushes. I’m not sure that the sympathy for it getting published is necessary or justified.

SchoolOfLife2 · 11/04/2019 10:36

Purple do you work for DM?

meercat23 · 11/04/2019 10:37

Maybe not purple but the anger against lazy and rubbish journalists is justified.

Go find your own stories. Mumsnet, if your are getting paid for letting the press publish things posted here you should say so. If you are not getting paid it is possible you could copyright so that they cannot just lift stuff. Despicable.

Lifting funny stories is one thing but this thread is about a family hurting because of the action of one family member. Not remotely funny and highly sensitive.

PurpleDaisies · 11/04/2019 10:38

No, of course not. I was worried about this happening so I asked the op (thinking she might get the thread pulled). She said she wasn’t bothered.

Contraceptionismyfriend · 11/04/2019 10:39

@meercat23 it's been discussed many many many times. MN has said that as this is a public forum nothing is private or copyrighted. Anything posted here can be used anywhere else and there is nothing that can be done about it.

And why would they even if they could? Free advertising is brilliant.

meercat23 · 11/04/2019 15:19

Contra I know that is the Mumsnet position but I thought it worth putting the question again as to whether this is the position they should be taking. I guess we just all need to be careful what we post here as, given that is the position, it is not a really safe place.

Putthatlampshadeonyourhead · 11/04/2019 17:38

It's not a safe place. Its social media.

Hearhere · 11/04/2019 18:00

we are speaking openly in a public place here

headinhands · 11/04/2019 20:13

If I was a journalist charged with finding this sort of story to fill out the gaps in between the bigger stuff I reckon Mumsnet would be the perfect place to look.

Hearhere · 11/04/2019 21:46

Indeed we are so kind and so generous as mumsnetters, we give our time and effort for free creating content for Mumsnet to monetize and we also create content for free for the newspapers

exWifebeginsat40 · 11/04/2019 23:23

stop doing it then.

youngscrappyandhungry · 12/04/2019 03:31

OP, the same thing happened to me last year: the Sun took my thread seeking advice about a close friend and her abusive fiancé and turned it into an easily identifiable tabloid style article. I was furious and immediately asked for the thread to be deleted by Mumsnet HQ to prevent other outlets from following suit. I also went to the Sun's website and found the email address to report a misprint or inaccuracy in a story. I sent them a request to delete the story from their website and archives as I hadn't given them consent to reproduce my post; plus their article potentially put my friend in danger if her fiancé were to see it. They took it down in less than 3 hours.

I assume they would do the same for you upon request, especially if you complain about the article taking advantage of a grieving mother (Sister B) and exposing potential mental illness in another (Sister A). Your family has the right to privacy in this trying situation, should you want it. It's possible that you've said elsewhere that you don't mind your post being written about in the newspapers, in which case feel free to ignore me! I did my best to RTFT but I might have missed something. Regardless, you're handing an incredibly difficult situation with grace and compassion and should be commended for that. My condolences on the loss of Matilda. Thanks

DantesInferno · 12/04/2019 09:38

You have to love their picture choices, doesn't look like an angry sister to me...

My sister is faking her pregnancy.