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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think he is our child and we will manage just fine Thankyou and have fun as well

117 replies

Driftingthoughlife · 06/04/2019 12:27

We are going abroad for 2 weeks on Monday me my DH and five year old DS.
The two times we have been before with DS grandparents have come as well. This time it will be just the three of us.
The amount of people saying we won’t manage well without grandparents and we will find it hard work with DS
DS is what I would call a normal (whatever that means) five year old boy.
We are fully prepaired for the four hour flight with loads to do and also brought loads of games for DS to play with in the pool and on the beach. There is also a kids club if DS wants to go
I know he will drive is mad at times as all five year olds do but aibu to think we will be ok. We are after all his parents and quite like him Grin

OP posts:
Brienneoftarthiloveyou · 06/04/2019 12:28

Of course you will be ok. Who is saying that to you? Very daft thing to say. Enjoy your holiday.

teyem · 06/04/2019 12:30

Why would anyone think that you wouldn't manage on holiday with two parents and one solitary 5 year old? Madness Confused

Have a lovely holiday.

Cheeserton · 06/04/2019 12:30

YANBU. Why on earth would the two of you not be able to cope with your own child? Is there any other history backing up these numerous weird insinuations?

DobbyLovesSocks · 06/04/2019 12:35

We took my then 4-year old DS to Spain before he started school. Packed a rucksack with activities for the flight there - due to the time of the flight etc we had to be at the airport early which meant that my plan to get DS in the car while still asleep backfired and he was awake the whole journey there (very excited) and in the airport. By the time the aeroplane had taxi'd off the runway DS had fallen asleep and slept the whole flight there! Same on the way back lol
We were there for a week and made use of the kids club a few times which DS loved. Brilliant week and apart from the weather being a bit crap we had a lovely time. In fact its one of the holidays we have had in the last 15 years that I have fond memories of. The ones that were just me and DH are a bit meh really
Enjoy!

ZippyBungleandGeorge · 06/04/2019 12:36

Unless this is a typo and you in fact have five one year olds, I don't see what the issue is? Have fun it'll be great

GrainOfSalt · 06/04/2019 12:39

Gosh I did Australia with a 4 year old and were completely on our own for 9 days travelling and sight seeing. We also survived in France for a week on our own and had a lovely time (but then I too like my DS Grin ) You will be fine - the other people are bonkers

Barbie222 · 06/04/2019 12:41

The only reason anyone would say this is if you had relied on extra help from anyone and everyone since the word go to cope with parenting one child, and we all know a few people where that's definitely the case. Without knowing you, if this isn't the case then YANBU.

Bethan369 · 06/04/2019 12:41

How odd. I can’t image why 2 parents wouldn’t be able to cope with one child!

corythatwas · 06/04/2019 12:42

Good heavens, they don't give you much credit, do they? Of course you'll be fine- have a lovely holiday!

Friedspamfritters · 06/04/2019 12:43

What a strange thing for people to say! I could understand maybe if you have 6 kids under 7 and you're a single mum but one 5 year old and two adults? Why wouldn't you be able to manage that?

NewSchoolNewName · 06/04/2019 12:43

I can’t see why there’s any question about this, loads of families go on holiday without grandparents and manage just fine.

Unless there’s some sort of major drip feed about why you might have difficulty coping coming up!

SandyY2K · 06/04/2019 12:44

Unless there's a backstory I can't understand why that would be said.

We've been on holiday with a 2 year old and I was 6 months pregnant.

We've been with a 4 and a 2 year old, then when they were 6 and 4 year old we went to Florida and nobody ever said that to us.

Unless your DS has complex behavioural issues or either of you have demonstrated to others

that you struggle to manage with him... then YANBU.

Grisaille · 06/04/2019 12:45

What on Earth do they think is going to happen?

Helplessfeeling · 06/04/2019 12:48

Is it the grandparents saying this? Were they hoping to be invited on every family holiday with you?

Ohyesiam · 06/04/2019 12:48

My two have never Been to a kids club, somehow we coped!

Dull People love to catastrophes.
Send them lots of pictures of you all having a ball. Or flicking Vs at the camera.

BaronessBomburst · 06/04/2019 12:49

Is this the grandparents making digs because you're going away without them?
I'm actually laughing. Of course you'll be fine!

QueenEhlana · 06/04/2019 12:51

I suspect the grandparents have overplayed just how much they do for you and your DS, and so people think you rely on them for help.

babysharkah · 06/04/2019 12:51

I can't understand why you wouldn't be fine. What a bizarre thing to say.

bigKiteFlying · 06/04/2019 12:52

Is it the DGP or their friends?

We had this first holiday with kids - apparently it would be awful - it was great - next few they invited themselves along booked after we did - then we decided no it was just us - lots of telling us then the kids it would be awful. It was absolutely great.

(DGP went on lots and lot of other holidays and still do - other DGP don't like any kind of travel/days out or away for us as they worry Hmm)

PregnantSea · 06/04/2019 12:52

Unless there's a huge backstory where you and DH have never looked after your own DC before then I don't see what the issue is?

Sounds like overbearing GPs trying to justify their role... They want to believe that you can't cope without them because it makes them feel needed.

Tell them to give over and enjoy your hols OP!

MoaningMinniee · 06/04/2019 12:55

I went away for nine weeks on my own with a pair of five year olds just before they started school. Apart from a few days here and there when various family members joined us as we trundled around Europe with these travel vouchers I'd won and which would expire if I didn't use them, I was the only adult.

It was amazing!

Jebuschristchocolatebar · 06/04/2019 12:55

Have you ever wondered how millions of people cope on holidays with their kids every year?

pigsDOfly · 06/04/2019 13:00

Do you not look after at home? Why on earth would anyone think you couldn't manage on holiday when two parents are going to be around to manage one child 24/7.

You say at the end of your post that you know he will drive you mad at times, why?

Are you actually giving people the idea that you think you might not cope.

My then husband and I, like thousands of other people, took our children on holidays both when they were small and when they were older, some long haul flights. It never occurred to me, or anyone else as far as I know, that we wouldn't cope with them on our own. Nor did I think that they would drive me particularly mad whilst on holiday.

TheGrey1houndSpeaks · 06/04/2019 13:00

One child?? Haven’t you ever been alone with him before?! This is bizarre.

clairemcnam · 06/04/2019 13:03

Either you are giving people the impression you can not cope.
This is the GPs saying this because they want to come with you.
Or you are misinterpreting what people are saying.

Because no people generally would not think that normal parents could not cope with one child alone for a week.