To wonder what working parents are meant to do in school holidays?

[StepAwayFromGoogle]

DD1 starts school in September. DP and I both work because we can't afford for either one of us to be off. I have applied for part time but my work have been spectacularly backward and refused point blank, which is a whole other thread. I am looking for another job but work in a very specific field in a very specific industry so it's not looking likely that I'll get something, much less part time.
DD1 school have a before and after school club which is over subscribed so she won't get in for the first year. We have scrabbled around and managed to cover the week with GPs and a childminder.
So on to the holidays. DD1 will have 13 weeks off school a year. Between us, me and DP will have just under 10 weeks holiday. AIBU to think that if the govt wants parents (particularly mothers) to work then there needs to be better holiday provision? I'm not blindingly sure what working parents are expected to do after 3pm every day and for the 13 weeks children are off in the year. At the moment all our holiday days will be spent covering time off school and we won't be able to have a holiday together as a family.

What do you do with the children at the moment?

I agree it gets more complicated once they're at school but the answer is to find a childminder who can take them in the morning. collect them after school and have them during the holidays.

There will also be lots of holiday clubs going on but DD might be a bit young to be left at them all day every week. Once she gets a bit older, you'll have more options.

I wish there was a type of agency that could pair up teachers or supply teachers that were willing to take on children for a few weeks in summer. I was on supply last year and I could really have done with the extra money but, in my 30s, there wasn’t many summer jobs around - child care would have been ideal. Not all teachers have children of their own and I usually do 2-3 weeks in school so would be free for 3-4 weeks of the holiday to childmind.

Summer au pair (many girls are happy to come over from Europe for 4-6 weeks), holiday clubs, full time au pair/mother’s help, childminder, combination of all of the above. Arrangements and needs change as the children grow older.

My kids are at an indie so we have 20 weeks to cover. We manage to cover holidays via annual leave, holiday clubs and GP’s. TBH I feel like I am the only one that is missing out as I would love to spend the whole holidays with them. They are quite happy! Would actually love to only have 13 weeks a year to cover!

I m afraid i agree with the previous poster. Part of deciding to have children is accepting responsibility for their care. If you don’t have family help, you have to be prepared to give up your career

I wish as a society we could be more honest about this rather than peddling the have it all myth

iamthere I doubt most teachers would be interested in the usual minimum wage rates for this kind of work.

My mum used to help, we’d split annual leave and when dc started school split another few days with another parent.it wasn’t easy

This will get worse now the retirement age has been extended so far and there aren't any non working grannies to look after the grandchildren. I wonder if the Government even thought about that

Ditto the Pension Credit changes coming in for mixed age couples. The younger half of the couple will be expected to look for work whether he/she is two years younger or ten years younger,

Plenty of people on the Money Matters board were cheering on this change though proving there are a hell of a lot of people incapable of critical thinking.

YANBU!

We're just starting out on this pathway through school & holidays etc

Wrap around care at nursery seems like a distant dream!

Reading posts with interest

Ha, at least you can access holiday clubs etc. ......try managing with a disabled child. Unless you're lucky enough to have a very supportive family you're screwed.

If you don’t have family help, you have to be prepared to give up your career

I'm astounded that this should even be considered a valid opinion in the 21st century. Absolutely nobody should be forced to give up their career to have children, especially as I most families now need both parents to be working in order to afford even a fairly basic standard of living. Being forced to give up a career also leaves the non-working parent vulnerable to a future change in circumstances.

Working parents are benefiting society and the economy and there needs to be affordable childcare options available, as there are in most of the rest of the world.

School is NOT free childcare - what do you think working mothers before you have done during school holidays?

You do what 100s of 1000s of other parents do you get childcare in place. Some use grandparents, relatives, holiday clubs, childminders, sports clubs, church clubs, annual leave etc. It's one of the things that come with having kids you know they are going to start school and you know schools have holidays. If you work you have to find ways around it

I feel your pain, I'm a single parent and work part time. My ds has a care club at school but in the holidays it's held at s different venue. I don't drive and the place is not on a bus route so I have to take him in a taxi otherwise we would be leaving the house at 7.30 to get the bus and then walk nearly a mile to get him there and I'd have to walk back to the bus stop. School holidays cost me more than my weekly wage

Top tip, when asking other parents if you can come to a mutually satisfactory swap, a) try to choose other full time working parents so it feels fairer b) be very gentle and non pushy c) forget anyone with older siblings at the school as they will already be sorted. People are quite often not keen.

Obviously it helps if you get to know each other first and its a friendship not just useful, and if the dc get on.

I don't know how parents/ children with both parents working full time cope to be honest. I work part time and still find difficult during school holidays. Spend a small fortune with clubs for a couple of weeks but can't do too much because it is very tiring for the children too. So each of us take a few days off work to stay with them. And we are lucky that DH can sometimes work from home. Very little holidays left to be taken as a family. It gets easier when they are older and can be left alone for a couple of hours but still requires a lot of planning and £££

We have tried so many options. As many have already said - childminders, part time nannies, uni and 6th formers, holiday clubs, pairing up with another family and sharing and grandparents. We also found the local college had a teacher training course - so found students who were willing to take paid work for childcare. That was surprisingly one of our worst experiences... but that’s another story!

A friend of mine hired a student teacher to mind her son from the age of 7 to 10.

I think things are a lot easier in some ways if you are the parent of a child who enjoys groups of children. Holiday clubs etc are going to be much more appealing to those children than to the children who yearn to spend their free time alone, or with one close friend.

My eldest child has always hated me working, she longs for me to be there in the morning and there after school, and summer holidays are even worse.

Dippy The reason our childcare is so expensive (outside the Nordic countries) is because our standards are much higher. If you want cheaper childcare, then standards around suitable buildings and ratios have to be relaxed OR we all have to pay more tax to subsidise it as in Nordic countries.
And in Denmark, most mums stay at home until kids start school.

I have used all of the following at some point in time:

Holiday nanny
Friend’s au pair
Shared with friends
Holiday club
Taken split holiday
Tutor looked after my child once when I was completely stuck
Friend of family

clairemcnam it's true that we have high ratios for the youngest children but it's also true that many other governments subsidise childcare to make it much more accessible (not just the Nordic countries but Belgium, Australia, Korea, Spain etc). I posted a link many pages upthread with examples of what happens in other countries around the world.

I realised about the school holidays and the school hours along time before my DC started school. So I got organised I am fortunate to work part time and when DC were younger I worked term time only school hours. We didn’t have any support from GP whatsoever (so I had little choice but to do this). My term time working and early finishes were stopped so my DC went to a local holiday club at another school and I took annual leave and used TOIL. Now the DC are at secondary. It isn’t easy but you are lucky you have GP’s willing to step in and help cover with your DC you just have to plan ahead and get organised.

Australia has 1 to 4 ratios of babies which blows my mind, and certainly isn’t cheaper