To wonder what working parents are meant to do in school holidays?

[StepAwayFromGoogle]

DD1 starts school in September. DP and I both work because we can't afford for either one of us to be off. I have applied for part time but my work have been spectacularly backward and refused point blank, which is a whole other thread. I am looking for another job but work in a very specific field in a very specific industry so it's not looking likely that I'll get something, much less part time.
DD1 school have a before and after school club which is over subscribed so she won't get in for the first year. We have scrabbled around and managed to cover the week with GPs and a childminder.
So on to the holidays. DD1 will have 13 weeks off school a year. Between us, me and DP will have just under 10 weeks holiday. AIBU to think that if the govt wants parents (particularly mothers) to work then there needs to be better holiday provision? I'm not blindingly sure what working parents are expected to do after 3pm every day and for the 13 weeks children are off in the year. At the moment all our holiday days will be spent covering time off school and we won't be able to have a holiday together as a family.

Do your work allow you to buy extra days of annual leave? I buy an extra week to help and then we.plug gaps with holiday clubs

We always managed scrabbling together as Heather and others have said above. I mainly relied on sharing with friends, holiday schemes etc. We didn't have breakfast and after school clubs at first so I then got an after school nanny who did holidays too (she looked after a couple of other children so it worked out for her).

Getting a more flexible job and good childcare is how we have managed over the years.

Op you can also take unp parental leave but the cost of losing a week's pay can be higher than the cost of childcare

Look on your council website for holiday clubs
Where is she now? Assuming you currently have some childcare? Will they take them for holiday clubs or after school? Some nurseries collect children for after school care

DS will also be starting school in September - I looked at which schools have holiday childcare and give preference to children attending that school. I've also spoken to the people who run the various clubs, and depending on what school he gets, may have to contact them the day the allocations go out to give them dates, as the get oversubscribed.

I'm a single parent and no GPs nearby, so there is no way I could cover it from A/L.

There is a salary sacrifice scheme that helps with childcare costs. We use thecold voucher scheme which is no longer in use. The new one works differently but is worth looking into. It will make your wrap around and holiday childcare cheaper. Dh and I are both teachers, so we only pay for nursery and wrap around care and they are provided by the same company in our area. Most parents split annual leave where possible and use a nursery/holiday club or childminder. Who looks after your dd currently? Would they be open to a holiday arrangement?

August meant I worked for no remaining money as it all went on day-long clubs other than our two week family holiday which we would book for the end of August so the kids had that to look forward to. Heartbreaking having to explain why they’ve got to go to a club they don’t want to go to, would rather stay home with their toys etc. It’s hard.

If your company won't do part time, could they be more flexible on working hours? I don't know what the distances are to work/school but if it's close could you start later to allow you to drop off at least? Also has your DP asked about changing hours?

If one of you can start early and one later then you can cover it between you (assuming you're local)

Alternatively childminder/childcare is usually available. Ask the school which companies drop off and pick up there.

For holidays there are a lot of holiday club options round here, childcare providers, local YMCA, sports centre. Even the tennis club has a holiday programme. Failing that parents I know will bring grandparents in to help, or arrange swaps with other working parents.

Somehow we all just muddle through with a patchwork of options. Top tip is get to know other parents in your area who might be facing same problems.

Presumably you paid for childcare before she started school so the concept isn't alien to you.

Having said that the vast majority of couples I know where both parents work have either flexible working and or Grandparents/other family members who help out and they pay for minimal or no childcare.

You open your eyes to the fact that school isn’t babysitting and sort out actual childcare?

What have you been doing fo childcare the past few years?

fo = for

Family or friends, book annual leave, holiday clubs, nurseries, childminder. There are options.

I work 4 days and DP full time. During school holidays we juggle our AL, dc go to holiday club once or twice a week and the gp’s do 1 day (appreciate this isn’t an option for everyone). I am also lucky in that my company are flexible during the holidays in that I can do earlier/later stat and finish time if needed or compress hrs into 3 days.

I am a single working mum. Can't rely on grandparents for childcare as my parents still work full time.

I take as much time off in school holidays as I can. Luckily my work shuts down over Christmas which I've found is the hardest time to get childcare so I'm always off for the Christmas holidays. Then I take a week at Easter, the whole of May half term and 10 days in August.

I muddle through with family and friends who help out when they can. The rest of the time I use a holiday club near me which is £15 a day. My company also offers flexible working and I work 4 days a week instead of 5.

This is the reality of having children. Child care is expensive.
Could you have an aupair?

Can you freelance OP? I work more in the term time and weekends and less during the school holidays.

You also need to look at the cost over the whole year. I’ve had people say ‘oh it’s not worth me working because in August I’ll pay out more in childcare than I earn.’ But of course, over the year they’ll earn more than they pay out. You just have to take the long view.

I completely agree that the logistics of childcare are trickier once children start school. But IME if parents have worked right the way through, they’re very thankful to at last be getting 6 and a half hours of the day they’re not paying for! (And yes I know school isn’t childcare, but it does provide that in effect as well as education.)

It seems to be parents who only start working again when their children start school, or perhaps when the child turns 3 and gets free hours, who really grumble about the problems, perhaps because it seems really expensive to them.

Believe me, when you’ve paid full fees for 51 weeks of the year, it feels like a blessing when they start school. My kids’ day nursery closed for a week at Christmas and the rest of the year you paid in full - whether the child was going or not, so if we were on holiday we still paid.

So, while I sympathise with the logistics, I agree with pp that having children means accepting that you do have to pay to have them looked after. And while it would be great if the govt could go even further to help, at least there are free early years hours, parental leave which can be taken in a planned way for young children and a lot more financial help for childcare for low earners. I had my kids back in the day when there was none of this, and far fewer child care options anyway (eg barely any breakfast or after school clubs) I do sympathise but believe me there are solutions

Why do you get under 10 weeks holiday between you? Minimum is 28 days each.
And that includes bank holidays
I used to get 24 days annual leave plus bank holidays, I thought that was pretty standard.

I hear you. My annual leave is taken on the holidays only. We’re lucky in the fact that DDs school has easily accessible wrap around care and offers a holiday club but otherwise it’d be a childminder and whatever holiday clubs we could find. There’s a few about (a general one, a forest school one, a science one, sports ones). I suggest a google of those and find a childminder that does drop offs/pick ups from your school.

I'm not at all suggesting school is childcare. We have been paying for nursery so, no, of course the concept isn't alien to us. GPs will probably help out but are in their 70s now and struggle with having two bouncing under 5s all day. I'll have a look for holiday clubs and hadn't actually thought about sharing with other parents so that's a great shout, thank you.
My issue wasn't with the money. It's with the fact that the government simultaneously wants to encourage mothers back into work but at the same time not ensuring that the school system works with that. We aren't poor but we do need two incomes. So does practically every other family we know.

Unpaid parental leave tops my leave off. I'll probably take 4 weeks unpaid this year. It only leaves me fractionally worse off than paying for holiday clubs but saves the kids from being miserable and reduces the chance of DD having a meltdown.

It is hard. I get 33 days leave but work at a university and can't use leave during their term time, and have to use some while they are at school.

Xmas - i do all

Easter and half term - split between me, dh, cm

Summer - split between me, dh, cm and holiday club

Occasionally my parents do a day.

Dd1 is autustic and finds the complicated plans hard - she gets v anxious. But this is the best we can do so we make it work.

Tbh when you have children you have to factor in all of these issues (working or not) it’s not the governments responsibility for them to pay to look after a child you have bought into the world

I have to agree with this unfortunately.

And school holidays is something all parents have to work out, your position is usual.