Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not understand why people want a nice house?

342 replies

tittletattlelolo · 02/04/2019 16:33

My two friends are into buying plants/cushions/ornaments/flowers etc etc for their house but i don't get it.
What's the point? Only the people living in it see it.
As long as you have the basics fridge /bed etc
Why do you need all the rest?
A bloody tray with scented candles /those smelly things with the sticks etc
I've tried to get into homey things but I just can't
Am I the only woman who doesn't get it?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
Sashkin · 02/04/2019 17:47

Rousette neither had I, just googled after getting sick of the ninety million threads about her on here, looks like Katie Price’s twin sister posing with a bottle of Cif in a very bland grey/neutral Barrett showhome. No idea what the fuss is about.

Patienceisvirtuous · 02/04/2019 17:48

My home is full of ‘stuff’ but nothing useless. Throws and cushions for comfort. Books. Framed photos of family or holidays. Lamps for nice lighting, DS toys and crafts, cat grass masquerading as plants, overarm sofa trays for drinks/iPad etc 😄 ...I need to declutter!!

GreatDuckCookery · 02/04/2019 17:51

Each to their own. Couldn’t give a toss about how others live personally, not my business. I love my house and all that goes in it.

MitziK · 02/04/2019 17:53

Plants improve the air quality (apparently) and their presence is known to have a calming effect, as green is a relaxing colour for humans. It's also nice to have something living in the artificial environment of a flat/house, particularly in heavily urbanised areas.

Cushions are useful for supporting your back or head when you're sitting or laying down and the different textures and colours provide pleasing stimulus.

Ornaments could be for sentimental reasons, tactile responses, the way they catch and change the light in the case of glass or crystal or because they accentuate or contrast to other colours, textures and shapes in the room.

Flowers, like green plants, provide colour, scent, texture, form and promote positive associations.

Many of us have lived in completely bare rental properties where everything was magnolia/white or beige, bare bulbs casting harsh light and a sense that the place was not a home, it was somebody else's property and we were only there temporarily, particularly if financial issues made it impossible to keep warm or purchase luxury items to increase comfort. Once you get into a position where you can actually decorate however you like and get the soft blanket that feels like a hug, a lot of people (most in my opinion) go straight ahead.

Humans have a fundamental desire to decorate and embellish things - there wasn't any need to paint wild bison on cave walls, but early peoples found out that certain substances made marks - so they used them. We didn't need to discover gold, silver, make bronze or decorate ourselves with feathers, stones or blossoms, but we did. I don't suppose a Late Neolithic - Early Bronze Age woman stuck a badger's skull full of daisies on top of the hearth when it was out, but she probably liked having her hair braided, some seeds dried and pierced to carry a strip of sinew through and worn around her wrist and adored the decorated corded ware pots, never mind the decorated beakers that came with the Beaker People.

We like 'nice' things. Because we're human.

(although plenty of animals also collect things that interest them - hence the Magpie connotations - or the amalgamation of feathers, broken shoelaces, ping pong balls and toy mice that are currently underneath my settee, as the TwatCat doesn't often play with them, but likes collecting things that make him happy I'm just glad there aren't his favourite chew toys under there, being real baby mice).

Trills · 02/04/2019 17:54

Only the people living in it see it.

I find this very sad.

Are things only worthwhile if they please other people?

No, pleasing ME is important and valuable and worthwhile.

(I just bought myself a very nice pair of pyjamas that will very rarely be seen by anyone else, but will be seen and felt by me often)

Trills · 02/04/2019 17:54

I'm going to light my scented candle right now.

reallyanotherone · 02/04/2019 17:54

It depends on your definition of “beautiful”.

Personally I dislike all the candles, cushions, scented stick stuff. To me it’s clutter.

My mum buys me loads of it. I “ need” a nice candle, or a few cushions, or a pictire to brighten that wall. Then she calls me a hoarder and i never throw stuff out. If i don’t keep it out on display i’m ungrateful and she won’t bother... until next time.

I prefer clean and basic.

blueskiesovertheforest · 02/04/2019 17:55

The op is worded oddly, but if tittletattlelolo means why do people dress their house with impractical, purely decorative commercially mass produced nick backs and bric-a-brac, especially anything like 200 just for looking at throw pillows on the bed or enormous displays taking up most of the dining table, which needs moving to actually use the furniture I'm largely in agreement.

Meangirls36 · 02/04/2019 17:55

If you don't mind it don't worry about it and if your partner doesnt mind.

Megan2018 · 02/04/2019 17:56

Because we like these things. And not just me, DH does too.
DH has a great eye for accessories!

Why does what other people have in their homes bother you? No one is forcing you to do it!

Cyw2018 · 02/04/2019 17:58

My chosen career doesn't allow for any creativity. Researching and designing my home and garden is my creative outlet.

happilyevernever · 02/04/2019 17:58

My DP is very much like you OP, doesn’t see the point in all the fiddly bits you put around the house and at most will put up a piece of art he likes. But I love decoration, I even have flowers in my bathroom, it makes it feel like home to me

MidsomerBurgers · 02/04/2019 18:01

OP, I agree with you on the knick-knacks as they just collect dust and I hate clutter. I still want a nice house though. Just that things have to be functional not decorative.

burritofan · 02/04/2019 18:03

I agree on not understanding the need for Range/Next/Dunelm-type letters saying "home" or "bathroom" or "kitchen" – I'm usually aware of what room I'm in – or the Sainsbury's tat aisle of unnecessary knick-knacks. (Plastic spray-painted gold rabbit ornament anyone? Don't mind if I don't.)

But OP, you do obviously like some stuff – cushions and canvas prints. What spurred you to buy those particular things?

Singlenotsingle · 02/04/2019 18:03

Beauty is good for the soul. It makes us happy. I like flowers and a few ornaments. Not plugins or candles though.

steff13 · 02/04/2019 18:03

Everyone has different tastes

You answered your own question here.

And plants are excellent for the environment and the air in your home.

Kobea · 02/04/2019 18:04

Why so many threads about people's trinkets and taste in decor and having nice things in their house? But never any threads about houses with no personality/boring furniture/plain walls etc.

Jealousy. That's why. Smile

poundoflard · 02/04/2019 18:07

Oh OP I feel the same way as you.
I dont get it.
Someone asked where all my stuff was. I said I don't have 'stuff'. No pictures on walls no 'twiggy shit' in corners ( I heard that on MN so I know its a thing) Grin
No candles , cushions with plain covers. No bedspreads or fancy quilts. My room has a bed and a chest of drawers, thats it. No bedside lamp, lamp shade on the 'big' light either.
I LOVE plain and boring. No books or cds/dvds on display.
To me its all clutter.

However I do go to other peoples houses and either think, WOW thats nice or bloody hell what a load of tat you have accumulated.

Everyone is different. There is nothing wrong with you OP. :)

Kobea · 02/04/2019 18:07

If you don't like something don't buy it, if you don't like someone don't talk to them, if you can't relate to the YouTuber you watch just stop watching them. It really isn't hard and it's quite sad that youve gone out of your way just to express how much you don't like something. Just focus on your own life and things you do like, you'll be a happier and more likeable person.

Trills · 02/04/2019 18:16

So, who is telling you that you should have scented candles etc?

Tell them to bog off.

GummyGoddess · 02/04/2019 18:19

@NunoGoncalves people have been making beautiful things forever though, it isn't recent. There are ancient ornaments people have made, and the mosaics from ancient Rome! It's just something that humans do.

speakout · 02/04/2019 18:21

OP do you do absolutely no "homey" things?

Is your home totally devoid of anything decorative?

So if you were sitting down to a christmas lunch you would be happy to sit down to old newspapers on the table to protect it?

PookieDo · 02/04/2019 18:23

I have plants that smell nice. They make my house smell lovely without lighting candles (I’m a bit scared of candles TBH)
I have an aloe plant because it’s useful and looks cute

I have cushions to make things comfy and also make cheaper old sofas look nicer
I have a rug for extra warmth and comfort
I don’t like ornaments but I like photos of my family to look at

ginghamtablecloths · 02/04/2019 18:25

Because many of us need more than just bricks and mortar to make a home. Yes, the basics are food, warmth and shelter but a home is much more than that.

To have pleasant surroundings which please the eye is good for our souls. I love pictures, cushions, books, and nice china. They make a house a home. A home is a sanctuary from the world, it's where we hunker down for security and comfort.

HarrySnotter · 02/04/2019 18:28

I never said there was any shame in it,I said I didn't get it and couldn't get into it.
I've tried but to no avail.

I don't understand. You've 'tried' to get into it? Why?

You don't like that kind of thing, other people do. Big deal.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.