Prime example of CFery from previous home owner... Aibu?

[mummabubs]

Two years I've been on MN and this is both my first AIBU and my first CF post! So...

We bought our house 5 years ago. It was previously owned jointly by three male colleagues (let's call them Tom, Dick and Harry). To give a bit of background context there were lots of small niggles shortly after we exchanged- when we moved in it turned out the 3 guys had left a crap load of furniture/broken equipment in the house that they no longer wanted and the garden was littered with hundreds of cigarette ends (no exaggeration). The loft was even left full of their stuff. "Tom" hasn't been any bother to us to give him an iota of credit. For the first 2 years "Dick" caused us no end of trouble as we had weekly letters and calls from debt collection agencies threatening to send bailiffs as he owed a lot of people a lot of money and naturally hadn't left any forwarding addresses. Knew my rights re:bailiffs so wasn't worried but it was frankly a pain in the arse to deal with. Damn you Dick.

The AIBU relates to what I think is cheeky fuckery on Harry's part. Harry randomly turned up on our doorstep three months after we'd moved in to say he'd come to collect his stuff from the loft. My inclination was to tell him we'd got rid of it all to teach a valuable lesson but my DH instantly said "no worries" and went and got the stuff for him from the loft. (He's a good egg). In year two of living here we got a lot of clearly NHS mail for Harry from our local hospital marked Private and Urgent. I didn't open any of the mail but could see the department number from the envelope window so called the hospital just to let them know Harry doesn't live here anymore so they might need to call him instead. Problem solved.

Fast forward 3 years and tonight my DH and I got home from a long trip to find a note put through our door "Hi, it's Harry here. I used to own your house. I'm expecting an important appointment letter from my GP and they have my registered address as here so can you let me know when it arrives. My number is XXXX. Thanks, Harry". I sent a reply saying that I'd look out for it but it was probably wise to check as I'd told the hospital before he didn't live here so it might not be sent here. Also said it might be a good idea to update his GP surgery with his new address. Got a reply a few minutes later saying "no it'll definitely come to you. I haven't told them I've moved as I can get appointments really quickly in that surgery and you can let me know when letters arrive".

So- basically he's refusing to register with a surgery in his own area so he can keep using up appointments here... and also expects me to look out for his mail and act as his secretary. I'm sorry but what the actual fuck?! It's been 5 years, just change your sodding GP surgery!! I've a good mind to get the letter and then tell him it's here but also call the surgery that stamps the envelope to tell them he's not living here anymore. AIBU to do that? Or should I just message him to say I'll let him know this once but I'm not doing it again? Or is that fact I've just endured a 3 hour car trip with a screaming toddler meaning I'm being overly harsh?

We have a GP surgery that’s really good. I can’t rate it high enough. You can get appointments without having to wait for long. And that’s how I would like it to stay, thank you very much. So I would have no hesitation in informing the surgery about Harry’s move because for every appointment Harry has, somebody living local won’t be able to have. And that could be an elderly person or a child. Fuck him.

I'm singing this to myself in the kitchen

Harry doesn't live here anymore
Harry had a room on the second floor
Sorry but he left no forwarding addess
It's a mystery
Harreeeeeeeeee!

It's lovely that you are kind OP. But...

1. There's a reason GPs have catchment areas if they do.
2. It's really not fair or wise to let someone continue to use YOUR home address.
3. Five (not one!!) years later he has no incentive to change his address if you send on post.
4. There's been a GP surgery practitioner on here telling you why it's not ok.
5. And recent GP letters can be used to commit fraud (with a whole number of other agencies & applications) using your address. (That you moved into 5 years ago, when he moved out of.)

I'd be slightly more sympathetic if he was a frail disabled chap, rather than a robust youngster, but I'd still not want to be complicit in a fraudulent use of my home address. YANBU to be peed off. It is deliberate and only you can stop it. I think majority on here have said same. Slightly different if a student or recent home leaver whose mum/dad still lives there, but you are strangers.

He's probably got a STD and doesn't want partner to know about it, which means he's a cheating CF. Letters I've received from my surgery have had a return address on the envelope, so you could phone them, tell them he no longer lives at this address and give them his phone number so they can contact him.

If it’s urgent then the GP surgery/hospital will phone him with his appointment details when you tell them that he no longer lives at your address. Do not entertain cheeky fuckery, not even once. And block his number.

He is well out of order, but if he has a serious medical condition of some sort you don’t want to delay him getting treated. I would agree to it this one last time, but tell him any and all future post will be RTS, no longer here so he has to sort it out now.

If he has a serious medical condition the gp surgery ery can contact him on the phone number op is fortunately able to provide.

Slight echo in here...

Good God! His health is his own responsibility! He sold the place five years ago! He's being a fraud.

Are you not registered with the local gp? They wouldn't permit multiple registrations per address. Or are there a few surgeries in your area?

How can a GP not permit multiple registrations at the same address?! Most people live with other people...

Text back to say you no longer live there and don't know who does. Then block the number

I'd be informing him I wouldn't be passing anything on with that attitude.

And also informing the surgery straight away. Our GP practice has approx 40,000* registered patients and we have to wait long enough for an appointment as it is, without CFs like this one taking appointments.

*No, not a typo, it's a very large practice.

I wouldn't normally advocate rudeness, but after that response from him I'd be tempted to reply, "After 5 years you think this is acceptable. Piss off and don't contact us again." Anything and everything that arrives for any of them gets returned to sender.

I would tell Harry (a) he can pay your hourly secretarial rate of [insert amount I would go for about £350 an hour] with an advance of two hours in cash before you will start work; or (b) that this does not work for him and that you will not be dealing with his mail.

I haven't read the whole thread but just wanted to offer some advice from experience. On moving to a new address, all mail for previous owner(s) is marked 'RETURN TO SENDER' and 'NO LONGER AT ADDRESS' if no forwarding addresses are left, which in my vast experience is never. Mail stops arriving between 4 and 6 months after moving in. What I've described is a courtesy: most people just bin it.

Oh come on, what serious condition can he possibly have that's being dealt with exclusively by post to his old address?

When I receive the letter I would inform the GP surgery that he hasn’t lived at the address for 5 years. Hopefully they have his mobile number, if not you can pass it on.

If he is waiting for an operation you could end up with district nurses calling round post op to do dressings etc. You’d be complicit in his lie and they’d know. District nurses won’t be able to visit him if he’s moved area.

I wouldn’t want him linked to my address and that letter could act like a utility bill to commit fraud from your address.

When I moved my GP told me I could continue at his surgery but that they couldn’t offer me any services apart from appointments and prescriptions.

As another poster said - text back

You’re a check fucker but so are we, you want me to act as your PA and use this address, there are charges of £100 per letter - take it or leave it, up to you

As a Yank I was surprised that Royal Mail charges to forward mail to a new address. The USPS does it for a year, for free. They do so because they make a big pot of money charging companies for access to their address change database.

As others have said, a letter from a hospital counts as ID and proof of address. Do you really mean to continue enabling CF to commit benefit fraud or similar?

Sosidog Not my experience when I moved house. Had been with a surgery for 29 years. Moved 8 miles away and I had to change surgery. When changing address at GPs postcode excluded me as a patient. When registering with new GP had to show on a map exactly where I lived. Medical practices at least NHS have boundary limits. Think the walk in style places take anyone and you don't need to be registered.

Send the letters back saying "not known at this address" on them. He hasn't given you a forwarding address so there's nothing else you can do.
Presumably the surgery will have his phone number so they can contact him that way.
And I wouldn't worry about it being important or urgent, if you tell him that you've sent the letter back and it is urgent then he'll be straight down the doctor's asking about it.

Didn't expect so many replies!

Well the letter hasn't yet materialised so haven't had to do anything yet.

I'm shocked at people saying I'm complicit in fraud... I've been very clear that I'll be contacting the surgery if I can work out which one it is (there are several in our area) and that I don't approve of what he's been doing (unbeknownst to us) with the GP surgery. Financial applications wouldn't accept a GP letter as proof of address so I seriously doubt he's part of some master scheme to sign up to credit via my address. Can't remember who it was who said my credit wouldn't be affected- I know this thanks to good old Dick and his debts. Once we'd proved that he doesn't live here all links to our names and the debt were removed.

I did send all mail back as return to sender for the first couple of years, this is the first piece of mail we've received for him in a long time.

Thanks to all who've reassured me that this isn't acceptable behaviour and reinforced that I'd be right in acting on this. I respect those who have chosen to turn the attack onto me as being entitled to their opinions even if I don't necessarily see it the same way. 😊

I think I would wait for the letter to arrive and send it back to the surgery with "not lived here for five years on". Then I would text him to tell him I've done it, point out he cannot now collect it and he needs to call the surgery to find out his appointment and tell them his new address. Make him do some work!