AIBU to not babysit my niece

[BloodyNorasNeighbour]

Having a very difficult week with my DH. He is between jobs and has been off this week. I am the major breadwinner and work very long hours. I asked him whilst he was off this week if he could do three things for us - clean the house, clear the ironing mountain and put up three blinds. Told him I didn’t care how much time he spent doing things for himself (ie golf, gym, out with friends) but could he please just do those 3 things. Today is the 6th day straight on the golf course He has also been out three evenings. He has done the ironing and cleaned 2 bathrooms, no blinds put up. I am furious and sick to death of being taken for a mug who does everything whilst he is a passenger in our lives. I have just received a text from him whilst he is playing golf with his brother. They are going to the theatre tonight and I had bought tickets to take our son to the cinema whilst they are at the theatre. He has asked if I can get an extra ticket for my niece as my brother in law has no childcare for them to go out. I feel used and a complete mug. I love my niece and to nbevfair my BIL is lovely too but I am furious and so upset with my husband I have said no. AIBU?

So I stuck to my guns. DS and I are at the cinema enjoying a nice night together and some dinner before the show starts. DH and BIL are staying in and not going out.

No, you have plans & can't take her.

BIL needs to sort out childcare or take his daughter with him.

If he'd have to use your husband's ticket well then that's that, isn't it?

Your husband should have suggested that & said he'd have a night out with his own family.

Oops x post!

Well done you.

Well done!

Make it clear you won’t put up with any sulking. If he wants to sulk he can go live with his brother.

Still do that thinking though

Good for you. He'd sulk whatever you did.

Is DN's mum not on the scene OP? There's no mention of her so unsure whether BIL is separated or widowed? I'd he's separated and it's his access weekend then why has he arranged to go out with his DB?

SIL is working she works shifts and has her shift rota months in advance hence why she is not mentioned

I’m going to sign off for a bit as the film is starting soon. Thank you to you all for your wise words. It has been a huge help xx

Good for you OP, hope you have a lovely time with your ds.

Remember, your dh only came home, made you a cup of tea and did the stuff he previously couldn't be arsed to do because he thought he'd get his own way this evening - you, your ds and your plans were never a consideration it was all a strategy to get him what he wanted. Well done for seeing through it and carrying on with your plans, you've put yourself and your ds first for once!

Bet you shocked him, by standing strong.

Well done! Don't excuse or pander to the sulks, though!

Leave

Good on you. Hope the film was good. Don't entertain any childish sulking behaviour from Dh when you get home.

I hope you had a nice time with your DS.

Time for a serious chat with your H.

He’s a sulker too?

I stand by my previous post.

Well done for sticking to your guns!
Even if he does sulk for a week, which won't be at all pleasant for anyone, he now knows that he can't continue to just take advantage of you and you'll just give in to save face.

Whether or not you want to stay with him if sulking for a week when he doesn't get his own way is a common situation, is another matter entirely.