DD in isolation for wearing the wrong socks

[swirlycurly]

DD who's in year 7 is being put in the isolation room at school tomorrow for wearing the incorrect colour socks, white instead of black. She did do this two days in a row after being warned so I do think she should accept the punishment as she was warned. But AIBU to think this is a silly rule anyway? They seem to claim that having school uniform is setting them up for life and work yet what workplace is going to tell someone to work away from everyone facing a wall for the day because they wore the wrong colour socks? So why do schools feel the need to be so strict?

I honestly believe a generation from now we'll look back on this culture of isolation in our schools in disbelief. It's perfectly fine that your DD was told off for not wearing the correct socks and a punishment for repeating the 'offence' would have been OK of it had been proportionate. Maybe an email home or a short detention. But isolation is ridiculous. Who ends up in isolation the most? Kids who for whatever reason don't have parents who can or are able to provide the correct uniform and kids with SEN.

I'm sure that DS gets too hot having to keep his blazer on on a hot summer day, but I think the bigger picture of having a good school is more important.

Seriously, BlueSky? Your child is put into a situation where at best he is too uncomfortable to learn and at worst his health is in danger, but you think supporting a school with ridiculous rules is more important? Surely you realise that having utterly unrealistic rules and enforcing them rigidly does not make the school a good one? Far too many academies go down this route because it looks good superficially, and it's much easier than making the school good by providing high quality, engaging teaching that stretches every pupil and fully caters for the needs of those with learning difficulties.

DS has to wear his blazer unless a teacher gives permission in class(which only happens once or twice a year). While I'm sure he gets a little hot at points, it's a good lesson in discipline and respect.

No, it absolutely isn't. What child respects a teacher who enforces a petty, harmful rule like this? Particularly when said teacher isn't wearing a blazer or jacket herself.

The blazer rule exists at my DD's school as well. Its ridiculous and petty.

I'm not trying make excuses for her but she is quite forgetful

Well she will hopefully learn her lesson this time and not 'forget' again.

Some rules st school are petty. But she chose to break it. Twice. So the punishment is appropriate.

My sons have separate sections in their drawers for school socks - all black and socks to wear at any other time - colourful stripey ones.

I had an incredibly strict uniform (Catholic school) everything had to come from the school outfitter shop and it was glaringly obvious when someone didn't because they stuck out like a sore thumb.

At the end of the day the black sock is a rule. You cannot teach children to pick and choose which rule they obey and which rule they break. Yes we may not agree with stuff but sometimes we have to learn to bend our ways to rules. It isn't always about uniform or clothing policies in work places, it may be about procedures or standards.

Non- black socks for school is not the hill I would die on.

I love the schools motion that it sets children up for the world of work.6th form and uni are mufti but that seems no problem.

She is free to choose her own sock colour
She is not free from the consequences of that decision.
There are lots of laws that I think “Really?” But they are there and I don’t break them

DS has to wear his blazer unless a teacher gives permission in class(which only happens once or twice a year). While I'm sure he gets a little hot at points, it's a good lesson in discipline and respect

How about last summer when we had a heat wave? What really pisses me off about this rule is that the head teacher, governor or whoever else makes up this stupid rule is most likely dressed appropriately for summer as opposed to a thick heavy blazer and shirt.
I’d be happy for my child to break the rule about this every day if they were overheated. I’ve worked in a&e for around 20 years and couldn’t even count the number of children who have been brought in by ambulance during that time for fainting over the summer because they’re in innapropraite clothing ie full uniform and blazers in the height of summer. Usually it’s wearing full including blazers all day at sports day that does it. The blazer rule is one which poses a risk to children health and well being in summer. If it’s about teaching young people to have respect then maybe they should be taught by example and respected enough to decide for themselves whether they’re overheated in summer rather than wait for the first child to faint followed by a relaxation of the blazer rule the next day which is usually how it goes in my experience.

What gets me about the use of isolation for something as petty as this is - what do such schools do about really serious issues? Surely all they can do is impose longer isolations or external exclusions, all of which simply mean that the child loses out on education and increases the risk of further misbehaviour. As someone suggested upthread, a far better punishment would be to keep some pig-ugly black socks and make offenders wear those all day.

I'm divided over these kinds of rules. On the one hand it does teach that sometimes you have to do things that you don't agree with or seem to make no sense whatsoever, which is something most people have to deal with as adults, so it is a good life lesson in that respect.
However the I really think most schools hide behind the 'We are preparing children for the world of work' in most cases that's utter bollocks. In the world of work you either wear your own clothes with guidelines on how you should look (suit and tie, smart/casual etc) or you wear a uniform. Most employers supply at least one uniform if not most of it, with guidelines as to what you need for what they don't supply. You're also not expected to immediately replace something that breaks overnight, because employers are realistic about how and when you can do this. It's usually also ok to wear cheap black trousers say, from Asda, not logo'd expensive ones from one supplier, as long as they're black trousers.
At my DDs school it appears to just be a bit of a power trip, and with some other schools as I've read on here. If it is so important to wear a uniform with such rigid rules for the world of work, why aren't teachers and staff required to wear one? I think an awful lot would change if teachers and students were to wear a uniform, because the impractical aspects of it would be flagged to and changed pretty quick, instead of just the school saying students are defiant and parents need to sort it out.
I'm all for uniform, but it needs to be realistic.

The rule is stupid. As is giving isolation for a second offence. IMO, isolation should be used where other sanctions (e.g. detention) have failed or where a child is likely to cause harm to others.

I watched a documentary a while back in isolation. It seemed a lot of children especially those with sen are just out there and forgotten about. They were behind on their peers as no one was teaching them anything. The teachers were just setting them work from a workbook. I honestly feel that isolation is just the easy way out for a lot of schools. A lot of it is due to the funding cuts so they don’t have the provisions for those who need a bit more attention.

Our school have the sock rule and blazers in the summer. The blazers really get to me. They aren’t allowed to take them off but the teacher is in linen trousers and a short sleeve top. As adults we are not told what to wear unless it’s a health and safety issue (no heels or flip flops etc)

She won't forget again. She broke the rules however petty they may seem.

It's a stupid rule yes. My dd is 11 and would have been so horrified to get pulled up on it there's no way she would do it again the next day, if she's upset why forget?

Hopefully this’ll help her to remember.

When I was training to be a teacher, one of the best pieces of advice I was given was this:
‘messing with their uniform gives students a way to push the boundaries. They’re expected to follow so many regulations and systems. Wearing the tie shorter, or the trousers tighter, is a way of showing their individuality in a place where they’re expected to be the same as their classmates in terms of appearance’.
It may or may not be this - but something to mull over?

She may well tell you she forgot - but she may also be exploring the boundaries of a school that’s still fairly new to her, and changing hormones, behaviour norms etc.

Perhaps discuss with her how not to forget again - perhaps she can pop the white socks to the back of the drawer or in a ziplock bag marked ‘weekend socks’ 😂

I tolerate uniform but I will not send my boys to school in unsuitable clothing for the conditions. No blazers in a heatwave, weather proof winter footwear with school shoes in bag in winter. Any detention purely o this will be intercepted by me whole I work with the boys and school on a uniform fit for purpose. I think of myself not being a disruptive parent, more a surgeon remove useless, cancerous ritual magic. No uniform should impinge on Health and Safety, all my adult uniform HAD PPE rules!

DailyMail but what did you do with that advice? Was it advice to enforce uniform rules or let them slide?

No wonder our kids are growing up to be soft arses expecting everything on a plate. Uniform is uniform. Of course there are workplaces that demand exact uniform.

She had a warning and broke the rule again so gets punished.

Get her to come up with her own system for remembering. Give the school a pair of the right colour socks and explain she is learning to remember. If she forgets ask what she learnt. Every day she does get it right praise her.

Alternatively, stick a spare pair of the right coloured socks in her bag and tell the school

I dont understand the blazer rule. It's lile theyve seen other places with jackets and thought, they look smart, but never been to one of those schools/offices. That's because im convinced most schools/offices you take off the blazer/jacket when you sit to do work. It's not going to be easy/comfortable writing in a jacket.
In fact i think we got into trouble for keeping coats on as you dont feel the benefit when you go out.
We probably wore then between lessons.
However blazers are probably not the most sensible coat too hot in summer/cold in winter

I hate stupid uniform rules. When I was at school you weren't allowed to take off your jumper, ever, even in the height of summer.

I can still remember sitting in class unable to concentrate from being too hot.

Who gives a shit what colour socks a kid wears?!

We had the rule too that you could only take off blazers and jumpers in hot weather when given permission to do so. Conversely I was told off for wearing a coat one day, as the deputy deemed it warm enough not to need one, even though I was really quite unwell but attendance was encouraged. It was all very petty and controlling.

It didn't encourage my learning one bit and neither did it instill any respect for the authority figures that enforced this nonsense. I support the idea of school uniform btw, just not at a petty level or at the point of abandoning common sense.

There are lots of laws that I think “Really?” But they are there and I don’t break them

Such as what? I doubt any of them are as petty as this one!