Driving is not as easy as some make out. Just failed my 5th driving test.

[Aeroflotgirl]

I know on Mumsnet. some on here like to say how everybody should drive and how it is a life skill, and negative comments about non drivers. I just failed my 5th test, took 4 tests 20 years ago and failed, but thought I would try again. My goodness, the test is a lot harder and it is really tough. I can see a lot of people not having the skills that incorporates that. I will take another few, then call it a day.

It is not the person's fault, some people are just not able to drive, and that probably includes me. What I found difficult is reading the road signs and getting into the right lane, especially on the big multi laned lighted roundabouts. So out of my depth and just fell apart.

I feel sad that some will regard me as being immature, CF, and undesirable if I am not able to drive. I always make my own way to places using public transport or taxi or if my friends offer me a lift and insist if we are going to dinner, I will but them a drink at their insistence. So try not to take advantage.

which we never practiced

Well, that part is absolutely not your fault! How can you expect to do something if you've never practiced it?

At least you have a better idea of what the current test entails.

Sounds like we are in the same boat OP, except I haven’t even got to the stage of taking a test yet! This is my 4th attempt at learning to drive and I find it so tough. Keep going!

Yep he never took me on that massive A5 dual carriageway (like a motorway but not), diden't know how to build up speed and join, never ever did that, or independent driving reading roadsigns, so when I got it on my driving test it floored me. He always spoon fed me, which at times I told my instructor not to do. I am changing driving instructors, even the examiner said really your driving instructor should have done that with you. At least I did not get a D fault or crash the car, I did my best considering a year ago I had crippling panic attacks, not one panic attack today, just out of my depth.

Yesterday he suddenly said that we are dropping his cousin home, when I turned up for my lesson and she was in the car.

I think the right instructor helps a lot. I failed a couple of tests in my twenties and gave up. In retrospect the instructor I had then was pretty useless. The instructor I passed with was much more patient and very experienced (had been teaching driving for over 25 years) and specialised in nervous students.

I also decided with my husband that if we were going to invest in driving lessons I was going to keep going until I passed and not give up. I passed on the second attempt that time.

I honestly thought I would never pass. I actually disagree though about practising the test routes. I lived about 30 minutes drive from the test centre so for practicality most my lessons were in my local area and not test routes. I didn't really know where I was driving during my test. So when I passed the test it gave me confidence that I could drive everywhere not just practised routes.

Ignore the ones you failed 20 years ago, that doesn't count.

So you failed 1 test. Just keep going. I failed my first test and I think it was down to not knowing what to expect and nerves.

The comments you'd made about feeling out of your depth demonstrate that you're not incapable, you're just inexperienced and nervous on the roads.

If I were you I would consider one of those intensive courses. They seem pricey but you get days of condensed hours in the car before the test, that will help you become more familiar and confident. I believe the cost of the test is included, and I know the one near me guarantees you'll pass, or you can retake the course for free, until you do.

Good luck. Keep going!

Definitely change your instructor. You need to do the faster roads.

No panic is good, once you've covered all this stuff you haven't there's a really good chance of you passing next time.

@Aeroflotgirl think you need a new instructor... just remember once you 'pass' your test doesn't mean your good at driving! Takes at least a year to get 'used' to driving! I still panic sometime on the new large roundabouts and iv been driving 5 years 😀

I had a year of lessons but had two or three a week - so on that basis you're two years ahead of me! The not practising is really tough, don't beat yourself up. Keep trying!

I took 5 tests. I had a really bad cold on the one I passed. It just slowed me down a bit.

I haven't rtft, but it sounds like your instructor failed you badly and didn't prepare you properly for the test. Please continue learning. Perhaps you can find a different instructor. I think that would be better for you

My sister failed at least 6 times before she passed.

Your instructor not taking you on the potential route Aeroflotgirl reminded me of when I took driving lessons and test in another country. The test was carried out by the Police and my instructor took me to practice near the Police HQ and then suddenly announced whilst we were driving a particular route "If he brings you down here on your test act surprised because I'm not supposed to take you on this route".. Test examiner didn't use that particular route so I didn't have to add 'looking surprised' to my driving skills and I passed with no problems.

Test route or not your instructor should have taken you to practice things like dual carriageways and large multi lane roundabouts and to have persistently done so until you had mastered them.

I took 4 goes and 4 years until I passed. It is hard! But you can do it.

OP please don't despair or give up. I passed on my 13th go!

Your instructor sounds rubbish.

You should be so proud of yourself for getting this far after dealing with anxiety, not berating yourself for not passing first time! Bloody well done, you're doing brilliantly.

I agree some people are not cut out for driving.

My friend for example would be a danger on the road, she has zero space awareness and cannot grasp how traffic travels. Roundabouts confuse the hell out of her!

But I think for a lot of people it just takes time and LOTS of practice. Good luck!

My driving instructor (many years ago, to be honest) used to say there were two reasons for people failing their driving test. Either they weren't ready, or nerves.
Having said that, l took my test nearly 30 years ago and things have changed a hell of a lot since then. l don't think l'd like to be having to go through the current one. Don't give up if you're really determined. Good luck!

The ONLY way I passed second time is because by a total fluke I had the same examiner as the first and we did the same route and the same manoeuvres. Otherwise, I don't think I would have passed

I feel sad that some will regard me as being immature, CF, and undesirable if I am not able to drive.

That's their problem, not yours. Would they think that if you had a medical condition that stopped you from driving? Don't let that bother you. lt's practice and experience and a bit of common sense. And some nerve when you're learning and first driving on your own.

If anyone needs drugging to pass a driving test they shouldn't be on the road, they're not confident enough. May sound harsh but the day after they pass their test they can be out on the road, still lacking confidence.

Driving instructors are definitely NOT told they cannot take learners round the test route. That aside, your instructor knew the type of roads the test would take place on and didn't bother to ensure you practised driving on them.
Change your instructor. Find someone who has a reputation for teaching nervous drivers.
You can do it!

Definitely sounds like you need a different instructor OP.

I'd make that your first priority.

We (DH and I) are in the territory of having engaged/engaging instructors for DC.

There are lots of instructors who seem to specialise now (different from when we learned) wrt younger/older/nervous drivers.

We googled local instructors and tried to find the best fit.

That said when DSD wasn't making good progress we changed and it was well worth it.

Imho it's not necessarily that one instructor is better than another per se - rather it's about how their teaching style meshes with the learner.

There is nothing wrong with you a bit more practice won't sort out. You need to practice all the test routes. I spent most of my driving lessons on every convolution of the test routes after I sacked an instructor I wasn't progressing with.

I was taught when learning to drive not to use the middle lanes on roundabouts when you enter them. So on a 3 lane roundabout for the first two exits I would use the left hand lane and for all the other exits I would use the right hand lane. (If there is a 4 lane roundabout with the first lane going left only, then second lane is 2nd exit, third lane isn't used and fourth lane is all other exits.)

Then to take roundabouts slowly but obviously keep moving. This allows you to flow into the correct lane as you go round. It has also stopped me for being involved in many accidents over the years when I could have driven into people who have not been aware that I was already on the roundabout.

What also helped was a friend of mine saying those multi-lane roundabouts are just one big roundabout.

None of my family had cars to practice in-between lessons and we all passed eventually - some quicker than others.

Keep at it. My Auntie tried 12 times before she passed.