DH told to "sort me out"

[feelslikeadream]

NC for this because I don't want to be outed here. Brief background - DH and his friend (let's call him A) were discussing me and someone else (B) not getting on. I explained to both I didn't want to have anything to do with B right now (B has openly bitched about me even though they've never spoken to me). Both A and B know I have a lot going on, and so apparently understood my reasoning for not wanting to get involved yet. Anyway, long story short, B messages me because of A speaking to her about it (they're dating) and I explained I wasn't comfortable with it.

A then told DH to sort me out. I don't want to say what DH responded yet because I don't know if IBU.

What would you expect your DH to do if someone had told him to sort you out?

(Also I have no posts under this name but I'm on here all the time. F the Daily Mail for anyone that thinks I'm trolling)

Is the backstory something along the lines of she was the OW/second wife, your loyalties still lie with first wife, hd so you’ve been avoiding meeting her? And she’s pissed off about that and is slagging you off for being stuck up/judging her?

Just block both of them, and avoid situations where either of them are likely to be. If your DH wants to deal with them he can do it on his own, they both sound awful.

Someone told DH to sort me out once, he went "hahahahahahaha, no." and walked off.

Not read all the comments but where I come from to “sort out” your partner is a sexual thing. And I would hope my husband told him to stay out of our sex lives. It’s got nothing to do with him.

Yeah if anyone told my darling DH to sort me out he d say .
no way .. you do it if you think you are tough enough ... now Fk off ! .
.
Obviously I don’t know what’s going on .. but your DH mate sounds an utter knob!

I'm pleased that you and Hubby have talked further about it. I was going to say if its the first time someone has said something like that to him, he might have been taken aback somewhat and didn't have an appropriate comment to push it back at A.

Now he has had time to think on it and heard your thoughts, it's given him more confidence to tell A to mind his own business.

Dh would ask if they've met me!

Originally i thought the comment was sexist.

Reading the updates and i think it was beyond sexist and it was aggressive.

Just asked my DH about this, he looked at me like I was mad to even have to ask and the words "tell them to &%£* off" were mentioned. He then asked what I'd do if someone asked me to sort him out. I said probably be momentarily stunned and then deliver a lecture about spousal respect and equality. Then we'd both downscale them to acquaintance or non-friend depending on how much fall out de-friending would cause in wider circles.

Sorting out laundry is generally much more beneficial for a relationship than sorting out your partner.

Gosh, they are a bit... common, aren't they?

I have no doubt my DH response would be: you have met my wife haven't you?!

This is a difficult one. Obviously your DH isn't your boss as such, but I don't think there's anything necessarily wrong with a friend of his asking him to (in effect) get you in line if you're behaving inappropriately or rudely towards an associate of his.

It's difficult to comment without knowing the full details of the ongoing feud between you and this other woman, but there isn't anything necessarily wrong in principle with someone asking your DH to sort you out, or your DH then doing so IMO.

I can’t be arsed with A and B threads either.

There's no context here, depends on situations:

Y: is this whole episode just you being a total diva about an issue that's a bit ridiculous but you're pushing this woman out of social situations just because you're being difficult and manipulative?

Z: has this person done something really bad that's unforgivable but her boyfriend thinks you need to forgive and forget

Terminology : not ideal

Does ' sort you out' mean talk you into A and B 's way of thinking?
A is a tosser.. A double tosser in fact. I'd be telling him to fuckety fuck off

He has spoken to you.
You don't need their drama. They can fuck off and come back when they have grown up
End of.

My DH would laugh at the very prospect! YANBU tho context is everything. If for instance, B's mother was dying and you were scathing about the way B was going on about it, then yes, get a grip. If it's something really trivial then ask if its worth the friendship.